Chapter twenty-five: Lincoln

                                    

                                          
The phone wouldn't stop ringing. I buried my head under the covers and groaned as the ringing seemed to get louder. Who was ringing at this ungodly hour? Not even Alex was up at this time.
Rosie started barking and I swore with Alex as he got up to answer the phone, rolling onto my stomach and pulling my pillow over my head.
"What the hell do you want?" Alex snapped into the phone. 
So the man had a breaking point after all. Interesting. 
"Ok thanks." He said, in a much softer tone before there was a click of the receiver. 
"Lincoln, come down here, kid." He called. "I know you're up." 
Why was I being punished? I wasn't the one who'd woken him up. I groaned and slid out of bed, opening the door to Rosie yapping at my feet. I showered and dressed quickly before going downstairs. 
I slid into the chair without a word and a cup of coffee was set in front of me. I crinkled my nose at the smell before taking a sip.
"Good morning." He said, softly. 
"Yeah, whatever." I murmured, taking a drink and yawning. 
"Why did you wake me so early?" I grumbled.
"Louis has set a date for the girls to visit." He said. 
I perked up. "When?" 
"Next Saturday." He said gently. "He cleared it with Emily. Now I want you to remain calm, ok?" 
"Why wouldn't I?" 
He laughed, his eyes crinkling with amusement. 
"Lack of experience." He replied. "Lincoln, you are very quick to anger. I want you to stay calm this week." 
"Ok." 
"I'll come up with a list of jobs for you to do. Including finishing that coop." 
I sighed. "Ok." 
"Good lad." He touched my shoulder affectionately. "We're going to handle this well, aren't we?" 
I nodded. 
"Alright. Now go outside and sort out that coop. The chickens are getting restless." 
I stepped outside into the cool morning air and headed to the pile of wood that was slowly becoming a home. Day by day, it was being shaped and structured into something sturdy. Permanent. 
I'd done that. I couldn't help but feel a hint of pride. 
I couldn't help but feel anxious about the girls visiting. Whenever I was with them, all I ever seemed to do was mess up. 
But I wouldn't do it this time. Alex wouldn't let me. I wouldn't let myself. 
I needed to apologise to them properly. I know I shouldn't have shown up out of the blue like that but I couldn't keep waiting around hoping for a chance to see them. They understood that. I never meant to hurt them. I only did it because I loved them and missed them too much to bear. They understood that. 
Right? 
I stared at the heap of wood in front of me. No matter how much Alex told me it was looking good, all I could see was a fragile pile of wood that would topple over with one kick. 
Maybe that was the problem. I didn't know a good thing when I saw it. I looked at the hens clucking at the ground. They deserved a stable home. One that was sturdy and strong. One that would keep foxes and other dangers out. 
I had to give that to them. Even if it meant leaving them alone. They deserved it. I couldn't mess this up for them. 
Maybe this whole thing was a bad idea. Maybe I should just leave them alone and let them have their own lives. Maybe I should stop trying to fit myself into their lives the way I did when we were young. Maybe it was hopeless to try to repair the damage of the lost years between us.