bonus chapter: julie and prof. robredo

                                    

                                          
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Julie's POV
I came running to the girl's bathroom, hyperventilating and cannot get a hang of myself. Of course having an autism meltdown exactly here inside of the university is embarrassing and frustrating. 
I entered a cubicle and locking the door as I sat behind it with my legs curled up and also curling myself up into a ball. 
This panic attack is the worse one yet and why did it happen when it's time of classes?! Oh god, Prof. Robredo will look for me. It's her time of the class at the moment and I ran outside of the classroom.
My body has been stimming a lot and luckily, I have a fidget toy I brought with me upon running outside. It's a fidget chew toy that I can chew on to ease up my stimming a bit and my panic attacks.
I heard the door open, that's probably Prof. Robredo now.
"Julie? Andito ka ba?" It really was her.
I kept quiet while continuing to bite on my fidget chew toy, careful not to let her know I'm in one of the cubicles. 
But then, she started knocking on every door, trying to know where I am at. 
"Jules? Are you alright?" She knocked on my door now. I made a little noise that informed her I am inside of that cubicle.
"Julie? Andito ka pala eh! Why did you ran outside?" She calmly asked me, but I can't really speak when I'm in this situation.
So instead, I stick my free hand outside of the cubicle door below to give Prof. Robredo my sign language, telling her "Meltdown".
Luckily, she knows how to read sign language. So instead of interrogating with me more, she also sat behind the other side of the cubicle door with her back resting against it.
"Alright. I'll stay here with you for a while hanggang sa kumalma na 'yan." 
Prof. Robredo has always been concerned about my autism. The last time she saw me having a meltdown was also the first time. She handled me so well. 
Each and every time my meltdown starts to attack, she would be there always. She's like my second mother at this point, a mother that loves me so much and understands me a lot.
She doesn't have any idea about autism at all the first time but as soon as I became her student and telling her I have it, she started studying about what autism is and what it can do to a person.
"Can you breathe in and breathe out for me? I can hear you hyperventilating. Nagpapanic attack ka. Para medyo kumalma sistema mo. Can you do that for me?" She calmly ordered me. But of course without hesitation, I did.
She was just there, sitting behind the cubicle door with our backs pinned at each side of the door. While I try to calm down and my whole system. 
After a few minutes of trying to calm myself down, I can finally feel more calm and more stable. My surroundings aren't really loud or bright anymore. 
My vision has been so bright that is overstimulating me and also the surroundings has been very loud. It was disturbing and so annoying. My sensory overload went up.
"Prof. Robredo..?" I called her in a soft tone in my voice. 
"Hmm? Are you okay now?" She responded and asked.
"Yes.." I answered.
So she immediately stood up straight again to wait for me to open the door and finally come out of the cubicle after calming down. 
I also did as well and now I unlocked the cubicle door to finally stand in front of her. She smiled at me upon seeing me doing well now.
"You did a great job calming down, Julie." She congratulated me.
Most of the times, I can't really calm myself down because everything is just so loud, so confusing. It sometimes causes me to have a sudden tantrum and aggressively move around that I can't stop.
But the reason I said that this meltdown is the worst one is because I was actually about to pass out from breathing too hard. I can't really control my breathing a while ago. And also, my ears have been ringing so bad.
"Prof.." I shyly called.
"Why?" She asked once more.
"Can you like.. hug me? I don't know.. I just want a hug.." It was embarrassing for me to ask this but I actually want her arms wrapped around me at this moment.
But she didn't hesitate and instead, she held me tight wrapped around her arms, while I also did back tighter. She was also caressing my hair upon embracing me. 
"Sorry if I ran.." I murmured.
She just chuffed and kept caressing my hair from above till the nape. 
"It's okay.. you don't have to explain nor say sorry. Just tell me next time if you're having meltdowns again, I'll be glad to stay beside you till you calm down." 
This is just making me tear up. But I don't really want to cry so instead, I buried my head to her shoulder and kept on hugging her. 
"Thank you.. Prof."
If it was only possible, she should've been my mother instead.
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"Sa exam ang tingin, hindi sa akin."
Shit.. she saw me. I whispered to myself.
I know I have test papers to answer but my distractions are just.. annoying me. I can't help but to get distracted over Prof. Robredo's pulchritudinous facial appearance right now.
Maybe is it because of her outfit? Her aura today? I don't know, but definitely something's up with Prof. Robredo now.
But hey, as long as it makes me happy, I'm good with that. She makes me happy.
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