Special 1 - Pain Has a Memory

                                    

                                          
"All the breakup songs in the world seem like they were all about me."
I Wanna Hate You by Boramiyu
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FLASHBACK
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The 10th Broken Heart
Nanon's heart had been broken for 9th times. He used to think that he was not lucky when it comes to love. He could not lie that he want someone to love him, so he did things that will probably boost his luck in this particular thing. Nanon believed in fortune as strong as he believed in God.
He was a sensitive person and cared a lot about people around him. As energetic as people saw him around them, his heart was actually delicate. 
He used to be a person who get depressed easily when someone broke his feeling, any way they did to hurt him, whether that person was his crush, girlfriend, even his family.
Until, at one point of his life, those awful memories of brokenhearted moments felt unnecessary. He fell in love with someone. He thought, his life had been completed. He did not need any lover. This someone made him feel loved and he could be whoever he want to be by this person's side.
For the first time in his life, he had someone as important as his family. His prayers had been answered.
That was what Nanon thought up to one day, this someone came to meet him at work, looked so happy while catching my hand, saying something while smiling widely...
"I finally have a girlfriend, Nanon,"
Yes. This person was a man, the 10th person that, in the end, repeating the history.
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That Night
That day was supposed to be their happy days. Their work just got more awards. As usual, their fanclubs would arrange a mini gathering for them. Both Nanon and Ohm were exhausted. Especially Ohm. He had filming and photoshooting all days. He also being backlashed everytime he wanted to interact with his fans in social media. Luckily, his girlfriend knew it was not Ohm's fault and she could take the bad talks about her easily. 
Nanon came to Ohm a few times in the gathering, to make sure Ohm can still hold it. He reminded fans not to use flash in the camera since he was aware Ohm would have more headache if they use it to take pictures. 
The last time Nanon approached Ohm, the man stepped back. Nanon did not realized it and kept showing his concern. "It's better if you go home now,"
"Why in the world are you telling them that I am not feeling well?"
"They need to know,"
"They will judge me as someone unprofessional, won't they?"
"No, wait, we are not working here. This is only a mini gathering. I will give them explanation,"
"People are underestimating me and you still push me to do something that can make it worse?!" Ohm raised his voice. He did not believe that even in this time, Nanon was failed to recognize Ohm's need and what Ohm was trying to do. If he did not have to prove himself, he could just go home from the beginning.
At that time, Earn, Mae Ning and Nonnie came to calm them down.
"No, you listen to me. I do this because I care. You have to go home."
"You will never try to understand me, won't you?"
Nanon's mind went blank for a few seconds when Ohm stabbed him with his eyes. In that second, Nanon knew that he hurt the man in front of him. It was too different, Ohm's voice, it had never been this deep and fierce. His eyes glared at Nanon. All the words that Ohm said to him and he fond of were all replayed in his head. And still...
"I don't think this is the right place for you to behave like this," These words came out of Nanon's mouth, pronounced clearly and nervelessly. He could not accept his best friend's behavior while being surrounded by many fans that had planned the mini gathering for them after receiving an award, yes, and he felt the need to control the situation.
"So what? What are you gonna do? Bring it on!" Ohm's body was unsteady. His face reddened.
Nanon lost his words. Earn pulled him back to another side of the venue, not too far from Ohm. She took over Ohm from Mae Ning who was holding at Ohm's arm.
Ohm apologized to fans who were following him to another side of the venue, making sure if he was alright. 
Nanon could only watch it from afar. Earlier, when Ohm was brought by Earn and passed him by, Nanon's eyes were still following him but Ohm did not turned around to see Nanon. He had no idea that it would need a long time for him to see that back turning back at him again.
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That Night²
Ohm was sitting in his room after coming back from attending the award ceremony and mini gathering. He ignored his girlfriend's call. Ohm knew that she must had seen the update in social media.
Thai, his brother, knocked his bedroom's door, "Phi, you can talk to me, you know?"
Hearing his brother, Ohm could not hold his tears. He buried his face into the pillow. 
"Phi, Nonnie said you were arguing with P'Nanon. Are you alright?" Thai knocked again.
How could I be alright? Ohm thought. He just lost his best friend.
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That Night³
Mae Ning was on the driver's seat. She checked his son from the rearview mirror. She was fully aware that it was all miscommunication between the two young men. Both looked hurt by each other's action. No one wanted to give up and be silent to hear another one's point of view.
Nonnie, who was sitting in the front passenger seat, looked at the back seat. She had just done texting Ohm's brother about the situation. "You are allowed to cry here kha, P'Nanon. No one sees you," she said.
"Believe me," Nanon replied. "You don't want to see me crying right now. This hurts me, I want to destroy the world."
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