"So, all the little moments... they just don't matter to you?"
"Of course they do! It's just that it's not... right. We will never be a match."
"Why does it always have to be what others view us as? Can't we just like each other without you worrying...
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Just as she expected, Ashton had gone back to avoiding and ignoring her for the second time, except this time it was way more serious than she had seen coming.
And both times that he had avoided her were all her fault because it was all her doings.
He completely stopped coming to the library for her tutoring or sending her any messages and when he ate lunch with Julian, he didn't even look at her or glance at her. Even if it was, he was looking at other things except at her. So because of this, she decided to stop coming to the cafeteria for lunch all together.
She knew that it was stupid of her to have pushed him away and kept on denying her feelings for him but still, she felt as if it had to be done to make sure they will both be happier in the end.
But now all she felt was misery.
Especially when she saw him starting to hang around Cathy Benson, where the girl would laugh or giggle almost every single time he said something. She wanted to feel happy that he was probably moving on since it had been slightly more than a month after they had last talked but only pain and longing filled her whenever she thought of him.
And it was all her fault.
She had wished she could banish all of those doubts and negative thoughts in her head and throw them somewhere far at the back of her mind but even if she managed to do so, she knew she would have been too late to bring Ashton back to her side and turn everything as it used to be again. But she also knew that would be impossible. After that night where she had told Ashton off, she had cried herself to sleep and could barely wake up the next day as she slept in most of the day and woke up around late-afternoon, having no energy to even attend the prefect meeting that morning. She stayed in her room for most of the two days of the weekend, telling her father and Piper that she was not feeling well until Piper had to eventually barge into her room and demand answers out of her, telling her that Julian had told her that she and Ashton had a fight. That was when Delancey bursted into tears and told everything and while Piper wrapped her arms around her and attempted to comfort her, a huge wave of regret crashed into her.
And now, after a long while of her miserable life, she had turned more stricter and colder toward the students that some will probably complain that she was just giving them detention for her own entertainment, she knew they would. She barely smiled and Piper wouldn't even hear her laugh that much anymore unless the joke being made was truly hilarious.
She woke up that morning and tried not to sigh since it was a monday and she had to face her whole weekly routine again. Step into the school, survey the area then head to her classes, when lunch would arrive, she would either roam the school for a second round or finish up her homework in the empty classroom that they had cleared up, since Ms. Kaden allowed her to. Throughout her lunchtime, she had let Piper sit with Julian but sometimes Piper did join her to have her lunch wherever she pleased. After lunch, she would head back to classes then once classes were finished, she'd go straight back to her room.
