Chapter 73 - I was my own worst enemy

                                    

                                          
J A S O N
We were late to the party. Daisy had changed outfits a million times, only to end up looking like a character from a kids show, and Zoe had fallen asleep waiting for her, looking like Zoe in her jeans and t-shirt, a knit vest over it, like she was going to the farmer's market and not a high school party. 
In the end, we still had to stop at a drive-through to get something to eat, so by the time we finally got to Kylie's house, everyone was already drunk or high, and we were just full of burgers and fries. The girls didn't mind. They were just happy to be at a party after years of not getting invited to any. 
I told them I had invited them only out of pity, because I felt bad they had gone through school without ever getting to experience the mediocre atmosphere of a loud, crowded, sticky house party. In reality, I had invited them because I actually wanted them to come. I almost just told them this, but I wasn't ready to reveal the secret I had been hiding for years, which was that I had always liked them, and that I had always wanted them to like me back. Except, of course, I had never caught up on how to express any emotion other than anger, and so for years, I had been a pain in their existence instead, and by extension, a pain in mine too. I was my own worst enemy. 
"There's Tristan!" Zoe said, walking past me to go grab her boyfriend from behind, who put down his joint to hug her back, and smiled, a genuine, almost child-like smile I never thought I would see on him. 
I also never thought someone like Zoe would date someone like him, but there she was in his arms, smiling back, telling him something, anything, that made him lean in to kiss her. I looked away. 
Isaac and Edward were sitting together on the couch, laughing at something Ethan was saying, sitting on the carpet across from them, letting Caitlyn braid his hair, a joint in her mouth, a beer in his hand. I knew Ethan's name because Isaac was always talking about him at practice, and I knew Caitlyn's because the teachers were always saying it, never for any good reasons. I thought he was as nice as she was scary.
When we were close enough, Edward asked what took us so long, and I said Daisy, without giving away that she had put a ridiculous amount effort into looking like a clown, and then collapsed on the couch next to them, only to have her collapse on my lap.
"At least I don't look like a randomized Sim," she said in my ear, and I laughed because I could say the exact same thing to her, and then moved to make room, so I could finally push her off me. 
On the other end of the couch, Edward moved to make room too, leaning closer to Isaac, who put his arm around him, smiled at Daisy, and asked, "You're his sister, right?"
She smiled back, "Unfortunately, yes."
"I'm Isaac," he said, pointing at Edward after. "This is Eddie."
"Edward Amin, I know," she said. "I voted for you for student president last year."
Edward scratched the back of his neck, "You must have been the only one."
"No, Zoey voted for you too."
"I did," Zoe said, still in Tristan's arms, his hand in her hair. 
I looked away at Edward, "Are you making cocktails tonight?"
"No, but I can, if you want me to," he said. 
"Yes, please!" my sister and I said at the exact time.
Before I knew it, we were both tipsy, going on drunk, and then just drunk, really drunk. Suddenly I was showing up places I didn't remember going to. In the hallway, watching Daisy try to do a handstand against the wall. In the bathroom, holding the door while she peed. On the couch again, smoking weed with the others. Outside to get some air, watching Daisy try to do a cartwheel this time. Back in the bathroom, this time peeing while she held the door. And finally, in the kitchen, looking for food in the fridge.