|| Trapped ||

                                    

                                          
For you I could pretend to be happy when I was sad. 
For you I could pretend like I was strong when I was hurt.
________________________________

Jimin felt something ring, or more like vibrate. He heard it. He slowly opened his eyes, not minding to look around. He looked at his phone. The time was exactly 2:45 AM, and with 150  missed calls. This looked familiar. Too familiar. Jimin now remembers. This reminded him of the day he got late to the dance practice. He started panicking again. As he tried to answer the phone, the call ended. He let the phone drop on the ground next to him, breathing slowly, waiting for another call to answer. He looked down at his hands. They were shaking, but not as extreme as they were. His clothes were kind of wet and his jacket thrown on the floor. He looked around at his surroundings. It was dark, enough light to see, but still dark. There were stalls and sinks and there were mirrors. Jimin remembered, He remembered everything. From how he felt exactly, to what happened with details. He didn't want that. He didn't want to feel this again. He was tired. 
His phone rang for the 153rd time. It traumatized Jimin at this point. Everytime he heard/felt the vibration, his heart beat goes crazy and his whole body starts shaking. He didn't want to feel like this forever, But he also knew he couldn't do anything about it. He answered the phone, knowing that he couldn't keep ignoring the calls. As if he has an option.
"H-hello?" Jimin hesitated. His voice cracking a little.
"Jimin!!!! You answered !!! Are you okay ? Are you dead ? What happened ? Where are you? "
Namjoon.
"Did he answer ?? Jimin ?? Can you hear us ? Where are you ? Jimin ??" 
Jin.
At this point, Jimin could hear every single member talking -except yoongi-
And that only made him feel two ways.
1) happy that they cared.
2) hella anxious from all the attention.
"Jimin ? You still there ?"
"Y-yeah."
"Where are you ? You have been gone for two hours bro, are you okay ?"
" I am at the bathroom.... I told you I was going."
"you told who exactly ?"
" Y-you... All of you?"
"Jimin, baby, you didn't tell anyone."
"W-what, n-no, no, I told you. I stood up and I said I was going to the bathroom and y-you all n-nodded." Jimin licked his lips. 
Silence.
"Jimin ... Are you okay ?"
" W-what ?? Of course I'm okay..? Do you think I am hallucinating ?? I am not crazy okay ? Tell them tae... T-tell them. I said I was going to the bathroom right tae ? Tae ? Answer me. T-taehyung ..? Tae, you don't think I am crazy right ?." Jimin started to Sob. No one could hear him tho.
"J-jimin...I ..."
"No.." Little sobs started turning into loud muffled crys. 
"No, no Jimin. Don't cry. It's okay. You are not crazy. Where are you ?"
"B-bathroom...restaurant." Jimin barley spoke through his tears.
"Alright jimin stay there okay ? We will come right away. Okay guys he is still inside I'll go get him."
Jimin loved how namjoon took care of every member including himself, but right now, he wanted to be alone.
Jimin stood up, legs slightly aching. He opened the lights and went over the mirror to look at himself. His eyes instantly widen as he examined himself. Jimin looked miserable, his face pale as ever, black spots under his eyes, his hair a wild mess, and worst, Jimin looked at his body, he looked like he was wearing a shirt twice his size. Without his jacket, his sleeveless shirt and v neck collar exposed his shoulders, collarbones and neck. His bones looked like they could pop out any second. Jimin smiled slightly, he lost weight, but then followed it with a frown. He once again, looked at his hands. His skinny fingers that you can't miss, and his tiny wrist that you could curl a whole finger around, and his red and greenish bruises. He remembered each and everytime he sis this to himself, and what each one was for. Especially the new one. Which was on his right arm next to a vein. He cut it today, after the dance video. It looked fresh. He sighed. He wore that jacket for a reason. He quickly washed his face, rubbing every inch of it. He hoped that the color would pop back again, although, he knew it wouldn't and exactly why. 
He stopped rubbing his face, looking at himself one more, straight in the eye, at the edge of crying, why was he even feeling like this? Suddenly? 
He heard two knocks that snapped him out of his thoughts. "Jimin? It's namjoon, the door is locked" Namjoon knocked once again, his muffled voice could be barley heard through the door. "Jimin? Are you okay ?" He spoke again when he got no answer. Jimin freaked out. He instantly began rubbing his face again, with insane force, until his face turned a soft pink color. It sting, but Jimin didn't care. He didn't want to be interviewed by 6 dudes about why he looks sick. He closed the facet and put his jacket on as fast as possible, making sure to zip it all the way up. 
"Jimin, are you there ?"
"Y-yeah." Jimin gulped.
"Uhh thank god. Are you alright ? The door is locked from your side. Please tell me you have the key in there."  He sighed.
Jimin kept quiet. He didn't remember locking the door. But the key sure was inside his side of the door. If he said yes, then he would be asked about why he locked himself in a bathroom. And if he said no, then.. well... He would be stuck here for a while.....On second thought, it didn't seem like a bad idea actul--
"Jimin ??"
"U-uhh yes. The uhh.. key is here." He mentally cursed at himself for stuttering. 
"Okay, that's good. Can you open the door ?" Namjoon sighed relieved.
"I uh... Y-yes.."
"Okay...."
Jimin glanced at himself for the last time, to make sure he doesn't look sick, and then he moved to the door and slowly opened it revealing a concerned Namjoon. Jimin didn't miss the chance to fake the smile. Once the door was fully open, Namjoon didn't hesitate one second to hold the younger between his hands. He hugged him. No, more like, squished him. Jimin didn't really mind the hug, but he was scared that namjoon would feel his bones instead of, well,... Him.
"Jimin what happened ? Did someone lock you up ? Are you okay ?"
"Namjoon, I'm fine." He said slightly pushing him off of him. But it didn't seem to work. His body was too weak and namjoon didn't budge, so he gave up.
"Okay let's get to the others and you'll explain everything." Namjoon sighed, slight concern rushed over him. 
Jimin signed. Namjoon just dragged him out. Jimin gets that he was concerned. He kept his face on the ground till they got out of the restaurant. Yeah, namjoon handled him well and he was actually concerned, but who knows how the others could react. They were already sick of him, so he didn't want to show them his face. Ever. They might start scolding him for making them wait extra 2 hours. Just like that day...It's exactly the same.
Namjoon opened the door for the younger with one hand and the other on his shoulder, as they reached the exit of the restaurant. 
Jimin slowly looked up at the others who were waiting beside the car across from the restaurant. No....
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Hi.  

                            

                                
                            
                              
                                  
                              
                              
                                
                                  
                                  
                                
                              
                             
                            
                            
                          
                          
That'll do.... hopefully...
*Omg I'm re reading this like, in September and oh my god I'm cringing so hard wtaf is this. I'm re-writing this whole chapter everyone. This is really bad. Anyways, future me is better at writing. Also frick you younger me what is this shit.
Jim-out.