Chapter Four

                                    

                                          
Claudia

"How don't you lock your own door, damn!" Claudia opened the door of Ian's room
 "Fuck" Ian bolted to the parlor 
 "She's not a prude, pretentious yes, but not a prude, right Lu"  
 "Not you too, ugh" Lucia laid back and sighed
 "Wanna know how I know you're not a prude?" Claudia sat next to Lucia flirtatiously 
 "You're always starting something Claudia" Jose rolled his eyes
 "Why don't we ever have an orgy guys" Claudia pouted
 "So that's it, you want to fuck me then?" Lu laughed
 "Because if anyone touches Ian you'll cry yourself to sleep for a week" Jose replied while scrolling through his phone
 "True" Claudia smirked "are you in love with them or something"
 "In love with who" Ian came in asking
 "Nothing" Lucia snapped
 "Chill they probably know, damn" Jose lit a blunt 
 "Know what?" Ian said sitting down "what are you guys planning"
 "An orgy" Claudia said smiling
 "Doesn't Jose have an STD or something ?" Ian said taking the blunt from Jose 
 "Firstly it was chlamydia and i don't have it anymore you discriminatory loser" 
 "You had chlamydia??" Lu asked 
 "anywayyyy , it's a joke Renee would kill us" Claudia sighed
 Claudia was always starting something, in reality she was the boring one, nothing was ever going on with Claudia unless she was with her friends, she was an only child of two very boring parents, sometimes she wished she was like her friends, they all had something going on, Jose was always sleeping with someone or something, at this point no one knew anymore, no one cared, at least Claudia didn't. Renee went through her transition a couple of years back, it was a whole thing with her parents but they're good now. Lucia fought everyday with her single mum and realised that she liked girls and came to terms with her sexuality. And as for Ian, Claudia really couldn't get into Ian. Ian's life has always been so eventful, she couldn't even keep up sometimes, but she was boring as hell, she was tired of being so normal with everything, she was so predictable, she wanted a change.
 She knew her friends went through real life shit but would it be so bad to have some drama, but what Claudia didn't realise was "real life shit" comes with real life baggage and her friends were holding on for their dear lives, Claudia really didn't know how everything affected them deeper than they made it out to be, she always saw it as a reason to live but it was the reason they all wanted to die.
 She felt invisible, which was weird because her friends did their best to make her feel loved, but Claudia was a bit over the bar of selfish. It wasn't really selfishness as much as it was her trying to make up for not feeling like she belonged when honestly she had no reason to feel that way. Watching Claudia create issues for herself and everyone around her to stay relevant was exhausting but not as exhausting as Claudia was watching Ian get high every single time.
She wondered if no one noticed there was an underlying issue or everyone pretended like Ian wasn't an addict, Claudia didn't feel any pity and didn't understand Ian, she didn't want to. She had concluded that everything Ian was going through was on them. 
 "Are you high?" Claudia whispered
 "Who is asking?" Ian smiled 
 "On what?"
 "Who is asking?" 
 "I want some" Claudia looked at Ian sheepishly, she didn't really want any, so she kept asking herself why she asked for some. Ian looked at her for a minute, Claudia felt exposed like they could tell this wasn't her but Ian was too high to care. 
 Ian signaled for Claudia to follow them to the bathroom, Claudia had done drugs before but not Ian's drugs, never Ian's type of drugs. She got up and followed them regardless.
 She quietly shut the door behind her and watched Ian with hawk eyes as they took out this white pill from their pocket, it looked like medicine but she knew it could never be just a regular pill. Ian crushed it and added another pill, crushed and mixed it, they put a strip of paper or whatever on their tongue and stretched out a piece to Claudia, Claudia knew this one at least, acid, after placing it on her tongue she kept watching Ian crush and add more pills to crush, she was so nervous. "What if I OD?" she kept asking herself, obviously it doesn't work like that but she was nervous regardless.
 Ian sniffed a line of the powder and signaled for Claudia to take the other, Claudia didn't hesitate, she did exactly what she Ian do, immediately she snorted the line she felt something hit the back of her head, everywhere went still and she could swear she stopped feeling her skin, it felt good but she was so waved anything felt good and at that moment her skin became sharp and the colours started to mix, she could see Ian inhale another line and signal for her to take the last one and she did. Immediately Claudia sank to the floor, she couldn't feel her legs, she couldn't see the bathroom, instead she saw a field with Ian at the other end of it, they were so far but when they spoke she could hear them.
 "Can you see me?" Ian asked waved
 "I can see everything, what is this? Where-"
 "Nowhere and everywhere" it was so obvious Ian was used to this feeling
 "That makes no sense" Claudia felt like she was sinking into a pool of paint, cold paint, but at the same time, her head was everywhere, she didn't have any time to process how she was feeling but it felt like her brain was doing everything for her. Ian was on the other side of the field convulsing, "was that foam or snow?" Claudia kept asking herself continuously, honestly she didn't care, she liked how she was feeling, it was so windy and her skin felt so nice but the windows were shut. 
 "Clau-" "help" "Cl-" "he-" 
 "Dude shh" Claudia hated Ian's' voice so much, which was weird because Ian almost never spoke at all, only when they needed to and Ian really sounded like they needed to say something. 
***