90

                                    

                                          
Back to reality. I sat in the dark dining room, my attention turned forward as I was too scared to make eye contact with anyone else in the room. There was an eerie green tint to the room thanks to the fire that the Dark Lord had lit himself. 
The confidence of every person in this group of killers was instantly drained when they sat at this table. Narcissa sat quietly a few seats away from me. Lucius looked worse than he had when I had gotten him out of the prison in Azkaban. Like I said that day, just a hollow version of the man he used to be. 
Despite how confident Draco acted when we were alone with one another, he coward down in his seat just like his father did. He would mouth off to anyone in this room without a lick of hesitation. But he was not one to stand up to the Dark Lord, fearful of what he was capable of. 
I, on the other hand, wasn't sure what I felt. I had been through some of the torments that the Dark Lord would do to those he believes disobeyed him. I wasn't scared of the curses he might put me under, having already felt their pains once before. The only thing that scared me was the only unforgivable curse he hadn't placed on me yet.
My parents sat across of me. Their blue eyes stared back into mine as we didn't dare make eye contact with the Dark Lord. A bunch of cowards. The whole lot of us. How were we supposed to be some of the scary people? 
We can hardly look each other in the eye. 
Or was it the body of Charity Burbage that I didn't wish to glance at? Floating in the air just a few feet away from us all. Everyone knew there was no good outcome for her in this meeting. She was the professor of muggle studies, after all. A muggle sympathizer. 
My attention moved to the doorway as Snape was the last to rush in to the meeting, knowing he was already late. He stared at Professor Burbage for a moment before his eyes scanned our crowd at the table. 
Our eyes locked with one another for a moment, this being the first time I had seen him since he saved my ass and got me the hell out of Hogwarts when he had the chance. I gave him a weak smile, slight relief filling me as I saw him. He discreetly nodded in response, glad to see I had been doing better than he had heard about. As much as I had been annoyed by him through the years, he was one of few that I knew would bring me comfort in our upcoming school year. 
Please don't let this year be hell for me. Please don't let everyone know it was me. Please keep me safe. I was bargaining with him in my head as if he were using legilimency and was listening to what I asked of him. 
"Severus." Voldemort said in an airy voice. Snape's attention turned towards him now, breaking away from mine. "I was beginning to worry you had lost your way." I could hear the disturbing smile in his voice, causing me to shiver slightly. "Come. We've saved you a seat." He gestured to an open seat that was just a few away from his own. 
I tucked a strand of my curled hair behind my ear. After the meeting he held a few short weeks ago, my mother had me dressed up like I was a doll for her entertainment every meeting since. She said I needed to look my best 'incase anything happened to me.' A kind way to say 'you need to look nice incase you die.' 
How morbid. 
False eyelashes, makeup done, hair always placed to a T. My mother took her time with my appearance each time, ensuring that I looked perfect. The black and smokey eyeshadow looks I had been sporting were not my taste, but she said they matched the black attire better than anything else. Plus, it's combination with my light hair and olive skin made my eyes stand out like daggers. Almost like Draco's.
He was not one who complained about my looks throughout the days. Any chance to suck on the soft skin of my body that he got, he took. No matter the time or the place. Hallways, in the kitchen, against walls, in random rooms. I found his lips on the skin of my neck frequently as he could hardly contain himself. I wasn't exactly sure what had come over him, but he claimed it was just how he took his stress away.