"That was Ethan, not me." He huffs, running a hand through his hair as Archie runs back in.
                          
"Toothbrush."
                          
"Oh shoot!"
                          
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"I bet so many of you have clicked on this video expecting a meaningful story, but I'm an idiot and you're definitely not getting a sob story from me today."
                          
"Hello angels, it's me Gabrielle, you can call me Elle. Today is a bit of a different video, while I do have a vlog also happening, I decided today just to sit down and tell you the story of Archie. If you don't know who I am, my name is Gabrielle and I'm mummy to a 7-year-old boy called Archie."
                          
"Archie was born in August of 2009 when myself and Simon were 16, both turning in the coming months. My parents were a little annoyed but were supportive, as were Simon's, and I was very blessed for that because I know there's a lot of single mums out there who don't get that type of support." Elle begins, swallowing the lump in her throat.
                          
"Simon and I were together for 3 years prior, and were together for 3 years afterwards before mutually agreeing that we weren't working out. It's common for people to fall out of love, and as much as we hated to admit it, we had fallen out of love with one another. He is still my best friend, he's an absolutely outstanding dad to Archie and I honestly am so so thankful for it."
                          
"Archie and I moved to London when Simon did so we could be close, when he started school I started a part-time job just to get some extra cash, and I would occasionally be in Sidemen videos and what-not. I found out after a few guest appearances that I really enjoyed like the whole YouTube aspect so I started my own channel, and yeah, that's why I'm sat here talking to you about my son." Elle beams as she tucks some hair behind her ear.
                          
"As many of you lovies will know, I was in a relationship with this guy named Isaac for a few years and he appeared on this channel a lot, everybody always loved him and always said how much they wanted me to marry him, and unfortunately I thought the same until he cheated on me the day before our wedding." Elle grins sarcastically, pausing for a moment.
                          
"Yeah, should've seen my face when I found out. Literally standing there in my dress, ready to walk down the aisle and I get a message from my sister saying he was kissing one of my bridesmaids, and that they'd slept together the night before." She moves her hand across her body with a thumbs up, sticking her tongue out in a jokey mood.
                          
"Yeah well I slapped him that hard I broke my wrist, ran away from my wedding that my ever-so-kind soon-to-be parents in law had paid for and went to Greece with Archie instead of him so, live laugh love."
                          
"Nah but in all seriousness, I have never wanted to kill a man in my life until that day, and I swore blind I wouldn't trust no man ever again. Probs won't listen to myself, but we move, we move ladies and gents." Elle clicks her fingers and points at the camera.
                          
"Anyway, he broke my child's heart more than he did mine so if anyone would volunteer to I don't know like beat him up, go ahead, just don't tell anyone I told you too."
                          
"I actually need to stop I'll get myself into trouble. Anyway, yeah, Archie and I are now by ourselves in this very lovely home in London, Simon and I are still best mates which is good because my son deserves the best upbringing ever, and uh... I'm a milf." Elle grins.
                          
"Archie is honestly just my favourite person ever. His sense of humour is fantastic, he's never doing things to upset me or annoy me, he's always on his best behaviour, has the cutest smile that makes me want to cry sometimes and is genuinely the only boy worthy of my attention."
                          
"Maybe one day I'll let you meet him, but for now I'm going to protect my squish from all the assholes online and let him make up his own mind about it when he's a bit older, sound good?" Elle questions as if she was going to get a reply.
                          
"I'd also just like to add in that I know he's been in Sidemen videos very briefly, and yes Simon and I have spoken about this, I don't mind it at all, but Simon and I haven't done any videos with him on our own purely because I know there'll be comments bashing me for being a teen mum or there'll be nasty ones about Arch so, yeah, keep your damn opinions to yourselves."
                          
"Oh another thing to mention, shut your mouths about Talia please and thanks. Nat and I have been friends for years, I introduced her to Simon, yes I am captain of the ship and no I don't care that she's close with Archie, she always has been. Wouldn't want anyone else being the step-mother of my child, not even Issie because I can guarantee Issie would accidentally drop soup on his head or something." She rolls her eyes with a laugh.
                          
"Anyway yeah, that's my shit story of how men hate me, see you angels in heaven! Peace!"
                          
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