Strange feelings

                                    

                                          
The reality and the cruelty of the moment hit me.
I opened my eyes and ripped my face off her hands. I was so embarrassed and confused. I could hear her panting.
                          
Everything was slowly coming back to me. How could we have allowed this to happen? How could Isabella allowed this to happen? And why the hell she isn't doing anything? 
                          
All that silence was troubling me. I could still taste her. With one last look at her, I stormed back to my room. Slamming the door hard enough to bring her back to her senses. 
                          
I was angry with myself. I was angry with everything that happened and the worst part was I don't know whether I wanted to get rid of all the essence or to taste it all over again. 
                          
Nothing ever felt more real than this and she tasted dangerously delicious.
                          
Fuck....
                          
.
                          
.
                          
I flinched by the bang of the door. I am ready to give anything to erase the memory of the incident that just happened and the worst part is I don't even know who intended it....our semi-kiss.
                          
I couldn't help but lick my lips to savour the remains of his taste. I could feel the warm remain of his palm print around my waist. Oh God, what have I done?
                          
I picked myself up and headed straight to my room. Locking myself inside. Tears formed in my eyes. How can I let it happen? Isn't he the person whom I despised the most? I should have never come here? 
                          
I pursed my lips and I could still taste his fruity lips. It's hard. That barely nothing incident is playing dangerously with my thoughts. It's so humiliating. Why do I give myself in? I wanted to take revenge on him for ruining my life but here I am few days into with him in Alaska and we kissed. Is it even counted as a kiss?
                          
I was in my room for the whole day battling my own thoughts and understanding myself.
                          
It's evening and I have to cook food. I rolled over my bed and was standing in front of my door.
                          
"God why is it so hard give me strength" 
                          
I pushed open my door and find the room in complete darkness. Scanning the whole room I headed towards the kitchen to make myself some hot chocolate. Probably that will help me to calm down. I lighted some candles to ignite the room with warmness.
                          
.
                          
.
                          
I observed her every move. Maybe she hasn't noticed me because of the darkness. She tilted her nape and gave her neck a slow rub. Everything about her was troubling me now. I slowly woke up from my place to get closer to her, perhaps that way I could inhale enough of her scent to imitate her taste. I don't even know why I'm doing this.
                          
Catching my dangerous thoughts together, I reminded myself about the actual reason I bought her into my life. I hate her and I wanna ruin her that was the plan. I planted the scornful sneer just to reflect how much I despise her. And I do, I honestly hate her and she needed to know that. She needed to treat me in the way she used to. She has to hate me. 
                          
.
                          
.
                          
I took my mug of hot chocolate to sit down and enjoy but as I turned around I saw Kevin standing behind me. The mug slide down my hand and everything got splashed on the floor. I stumbled back, "What are you.."
                          
I got cut off by him as he trapped me between the counter and himself. I was panicking not because I thought he would hurt me which was always the case but now because he was too close to me. My breathing got hatched. I could smell his masculine scent. Without even knowing my lips got parted. I was looking into his deep brown eyes, lost in the moment. He licked his lips and pulled back. I relaxed my state a bit.