Chapter 17

                                    

                                          


                          
Trigger Warning: Some of the contents may be disturbing for certain readers
                          
(Suhana)
                          
I sighed looking at the mock test results. Not that good. I need to study more. But because of Arjun, I can't even concentrate that much. Whenever I try to concentrate and study, he wants to meet me, or call me, or send messages... It's not like I hate it. I love being with Arjun. But if it goes this way, I won't be able to get into a good medical college next year as well. 
                          
"You look sad about the scores." Said, Arushi, my friend at the coaching centre. 
                          
"Hm..." I said. Folding back my report card. I need to concentrate more on my studies. 
                          
"Mine is not that good either," Arushi said. "And I really need to do well this yea. Since this is my second time repeating. If the results turn out like last year, then..." She looked nervous. Both of her parents were doctors and their dream was to make their daughter a doctor. "Mom and dad will kill me if I get bad rank again this year." 
                          
Yeah. I also really need to concentrate more time on studying and make Arjun understand as well that it's important for me to study now. Should meet him less and cut short the long calls. Even last night, I ended up talking to him late and was really sleepy during the class today. This will end up ruining my life if I don't change myself and study more. 
                          
"This is all because of my boyfriend." Arushi sneered. "Hate him..."
                          
I looked at her. She looked irritated. 
                          
"Anything wrong between the two of you?" 
                          
"I don't know if I should say something is wrong. Because..." She was looking concerned. "Ah...I don't know. I just hate him..."
                          
"What happened?"
                          
She looked at me and looked around to see if anyone else would hear our conversation. 
                          
"He just wants to do it all the time?" She frowned. 
                          
"It?" I asked. 
                          
"You know... it?"
                          
I could not understand at first, what she meant. Then, slowly clicked. 
                          
"So you... are – doing it with him?" I asked. 
                          
She nodded. 
                          
Okay... It feels a bit strange. Because even till a few months back, sexual relationships felt really an alien world to me. It was like something that would only exist in old people's world. But suddenly, it feels like we entered that world. Even my friends were doing that. First, it was Jiggy and now Arushi.  
                          
"I just..." Arushi looked irritated, "He just wants to do it because all of his friends are doing it too? Does that make sense? Will you jump in the well if all the others are doing it too?"
                          
"It feels a bit bad to do it just because all his friends are doing it too," I said, honesty letting out what I think. "Because it's not like it's supposed to be a fashion or trend."
                          
"Exactly." Arushi is one year older than me. And she has more experience. So I tend to listen to her for advice on boys. "Those are the worst kind who will think of sleeping with a girl just to show off in front of his friends..." I saw Arushi's eyes filling up. 
                          
"Did you tell him that you don't want to?" I asked. 
                          
"Hm... A lot. He says it's okay. He somehow makes me agree..." She sighed and wiped her eyes. "Saying everyone else is doing it. And it's not a big deal. Coz everyone else is doing it too."