Chapter 6. Part 2.

                                    

                                          
I looked everywhere to find Dae Sung after I came back to my senses. I had to apologize. I had to fix this. He was right; I am selfish why I couldn't let him be the way Dara did? Why I felt so rightful all along, turning him into a villain in this story. All he did was play along with Hyung's stupid ploy. His sole mistake was not breaking my heart by telling me to fuck off. It was selfish of me to blame him for not loving me back. But that's his choice. Yet, I kept imposing myself without considering his side of the story. I went to the studio but he wasn't there, nor his office or any other place I knew of. I walked around the city aimless, thinking what to say when I see him. In the evening Hyung texted me to say that Dae Sung is home by now that's why now I'm here at his door. I ring the bell and wait. There is a muffled barking sound behind the door then Dae Sung shows up, with messy hair and vacant eyes
                          
"What are you doing here? Go away! I don't want to see you" 
                          
He tries to close the door but I won't let him
                          
"Please! Can I come in?" 
                          
"No. " 
                          
He pushes the door harder. I let go
                          
"Then I do it here." I fall on my knees in the hallway 
                          
"I'm sorry. I..." 
                          
Before I finish he has closed the door on my face but I continue in this kneeling position
                          
"Fine! I say it like this. You were right. I was selfish for taking you responsible for my feelings. I couldn't let go of the stupid hope I had and tried to find a way back to your life over and over not knowing how much it would bother you. My friend sent you that message as a joke but it's my fault, I didn't stop him. I didn't think of the consequences. I never think of the consequences of my actions. I tried to use your guilt for Nam Il to be close to you but I took you and Hyung for granted. I felt like I'm the fox in the story of " The Little Prince"  who fell for the little prince knowing well that he belonged to the rose flower from the beginning. I drowned myself in self-pity and blamed you and Hyung. But in the end, it is what it is. I should cherish the feelings you brought to me and I never knew they existed but I threw it away and instead tried to hate you for not reciprocating my feelings. That's selfish." 
                          
I grow quiet since I have nothing else to say. 
                          
"I think your neighbors will call the police on me taking me as your stalker." 
                          
I laugh unamused. My finger touches the door
                          
"I'm sorry!" And since there is no reaction I try to get up and that's when the door suddenly opens and a hand grabs my arm hard to drag me in the house
                          
"That was selfish again; making a scene in front of my house" 
                          
He says, eyes scolding and cold. 
                          
"Sorry. I didn't think about it. I see what you mean now. I'm even bad at apologizing. But it's fine. You can call the cops on me. Tell them I'm your stalker, I have a file there already from the last time, so it would be plausible. Then I admit I found your phone number and send you the text from last night. You can tell Miss. Han that. It will fix the problem. I swear" 
                          
" Are you an idiot? Why drag the police into this? And the media?  He says as he studies me passively
                          
"Then I will tell her personally. As if you never met me, you don't know me but I follow you around and I will apologize for the message! Huh?" 
                          
"No. I don't want your help. I'll fix it myself." 
                          
He punctuates and I feel hurt. Well. I guess I won't be needed here anymore. I played all my cards and have nothing to offer anymore. If he loves her that much that gets this crazy over a text, there won't be any hope for me to stick around any longer. I blink.