Chapter Sixteen

                                    

                                          
Elias Salazar 
   I can't stop touching her. 
   And smelling her but that's besides the point. 
   The point is, I physically can't get enough of her. Like I need some part of her to be touching me or else I start flipping the fuck out. 
   Okay maybe that's an exaggeration... and a bit crazy. But I can't help it. I've gonna so used to holding her hand or having her on my lap, or even my hand on her belly that any moment I spend not touching her... it just feels wrong. 
   Maybe I sound a little crazy for a guy who's only known her for a month and for a guy who isn't even her boyfriend, but I'm working on it, okay? 
   Or at least I think I'm working on it... I don't know how to flirt to be quite honest with you. Or how to get in a relationship with someone. With my last girlfriend, she was the one to say she liked me. So I'm a little confused about the whole 'getting in a relationship' process. 
   I don't even know if she wants to be in a relationship. I would like to think she does. You don't let someone hold you, kiss you, and cuddle you unless you felt something for them, right?
   Speaking of which- cuddling. 
   Holy shit, her cuddles.
   Honestly when I woke up and discovered that my arms were wrapped around her like an octopus, especially her neck- I thought it was over. I thought as soon as I let go she would run for the hills and never speak to me again. 
   But she didn't. Clearly not since that was Monday and it's now Friday, and we're still going strong. 
   She even laughed when she felt me pull her closer into my embrace. That sound that I elicited from her just made me more reluctant to let her go. I never want to let her go. 
   She felt so soft and so warm. I know it's because we were underneath the blankets for some hours but I didn't care. I couldn't let her leave, I didn't want to. Having her warm body next to mine, my face buried into her neck and smelling her sweet flora scent, it felt right. 
   She was so warm it made me shiver. Her body heat comforted me in a way I didn't know was possible. Just knowing she was there- it made me relax. It made me feel like everything was right with the world. 
   When I had pulled her into my side initially, I got the sense that she didn't know what to make of our position. And to be honest I didn't either. We've had intimate moments before, but this felt different for some reason. This was our bodies being smushed together in a way that was sexual, but sensual and sweet. 
   I could tell it overwhelmed her a bit so I rubbed her back and sides to try and ease her mind. I can't push her too far, because if I push too much, she might run away and not come back. 
   When she finally relaxed into my body and let the weight of her leg fall onto my abdomen I wanted to sigh with relief. Peace. That's what that was. The girl who had managed to invade my soul was snuggled up next to me and it felt nothing short of perfect. 
   It's not lost on me that she's scared. Maybe she's scared of her feelings, scared of what could be, scared of my intentions. 
   Angelica expressed to me that sometimes it can be hard for girls to date guys because they don't know what our intentions are. For someone so young, even she has the impression that guys are douchebags who use girls. It breaks my heart that most girls think that, but all I can do it show Alex that I have no intentions of hurting her.