DEAR DIARY

                                    

                                          

Dear diary, 
                          
It's quite interesting when you start to like someone. It's like you start to notice each and every smallest details on or around them. Everything about them seems so much more attractive to you which seems pretty normal to everyone else. 
                          
Their smiles seem so much brighter. Their voice is more soothing. The goofiness in their laugh is so much more cuter. It's like their imperfections don't seem bad at all. Every little thing about them just reels you in. It's funny how your views on someone depends on how you feel about them. 
                          
It hurts when you love someone and don't receive the same. But it almost kills you when you don't have the courage to tell someone you love them. To see them with someone else, to see the one whom you thought one day would be yours to share their love with someone else. And I am dying. 
                          
Everyday. Every time I see him with her, it kills me internally. I feel like I want to shout on the top of my voice that I love him. But.... He is happy with her. I see the smile he has on his face, the quirkiness his voice holds as he talks about her. I cannot be that selfish. After all he is my best friend. So all I can do now is that my feelings for him will go away with time and I can continue to be with my best friend. 
                          
-y/n



                          
As I close my book, my phone chimes. So I scoot up the bed, crawling and stretching to free my phone from the charger. And it's the person I nowadays dread to even look at. Harry. 
                          
Harry: Hey.... 
              Are u free? I wanted to see you.  
              We haven't meet in a while. Are
              you trying to avoid me, y/n. You 
              know what, I'm coming to see you
              I need to talk to you about       
              something. See you in 10.


                          
WHAT !!!!! NO HE CAN'T COME HERE. I'LL JUST BLURT IT OUT TO HIM AND THAT WILL BE IT. THE END OF OUR FRIENDSHIP. HE'LL HATE ME. NO NO NO NO NO. 


                          
Just as I am about to text him to not come, I hear the door bell. And all I feel is sick to the stomach. I think all my nerves will make me puke. I take a deep breath and go to the door. And all i see is him with his head hung a bit low, the mess that is his hair, and wait, is that a tear? "Hey, come on in" I say softly, now more careful because of the state he is in. He doesn't say any word and just goes straight to my room. 

                          
What did just happen to make my ball of joy so sad and gloomy. So I quickly shut the door and went in my room. He was on my bed, head still hung low and in his hands. I slowly sat next to him, placing a hand on his back, rubbing small circles to calm him down, just the way he likes. "Do you wanna talk?" And he just nods his head. "We'll talk when you are ready ok. I'm not going anywhere." I hear him sniffle and I just knew he was shedding his tears. This was not our first moment of vulnerability but I have never seen him like this before. 

                          
"She was cheating on me." He said now looking at me sideways. Small sniffles left him, eyes red from all the tears. The sight was just breaking me and making me angry at the same time. And I just wanted to go and punch her in the face. "With Jeff" And now my mouth is hanging so low. "Is she crazy, or what. With Jeff. The Jeff who works with you at the restaurant?" "Yes. With that Jeff y/n and I broke up with her. But you know what. I don't regret it at all. I had loved someone else from a long time now and I was going to do it sonner or later. I realised I could not just drag her along with me but then I saw her making out with him in the back if his car. And I just broke up with her and came directly here." He was liking someone else. Even before I can even muster up some courage and face him, I had been deprived of my chance. 

                          
"Earth to y/n" Harry almost shouted. Snapping his fingers in front of me. I woke up from my trans, feeling a bit off. "I'll be just back. Do you want anything?" "No." So I nodded my head, getting up from the bed and stalling into the kitchen to calm myself a bit down. I drank some water as I felt my throat dry. After a few minutes of silence, which was very unusual for harry, I was a bit worried for him so i left the kitchen and went in the direction of my room. The next thing that I saw, I was not at all ready for it. 



                          
Harry had my diary in his hands. Reading with utter attention. I could feel the colour from my face drain. Sweat covered my palms and I could feel my breath hitch. I quickly rushed towards him. As if on queue, harry saw me and stood up, his hands holding my diary up above his head. His height was to his greater advantage. "Harry! Give me my book back. You cannot read it. It my personal life." Harry continued reading today's entry. I could feel tears welling up my eyes. I was trying my best to control them and get harry to stop reading it. "Harry. Please give my book back." I said just above a whisper. I thought today was the last day I was going to him ever again. To have him as my best friend. To share this bond with him. 


                          
A lone tear travelled down my cheeks at the same instance harry looked at me. "Please." I whispered. Hoping he would just show me, our bond some mercy. But what he said next, shook my whole world. "Why didn't you tell me earlier?"
"Huh?" " Y/n, why didn't you tell me earlier you had feelings for me?" "I- I.. I thought you wouldn't like me and our friendship would also end. I don't wanna loose you harry. I promise I will never come in between you and the girl you have feelin-" My rambling was cut mid sentence as harry's lips found mine. It took me by surprise, so a few seconds after I responded him, our lips moving in sync. My hands travelled upto his curls, deepening the kiss. His hands found my waist as he pulled me into his chest. 




                          
We broke from the kiss, out of breath from our passion, his forehead resting against mine as we caught our breaths. "I love you idiot. It took me some time to finally understand my feelings for you but I love you. I've loved you since we were 18. That is 2 years now. I thought you might go away if I said anything, so I remained quiet. I even tried to distract myself from all those so called girlfriends, but it was all in vain. I love you y/n, only you." He said, his each word covered in passion and truth. "I love you too harry" It was all I could reply before his lips found mine once again. 








                          
Hey guys. It's been long since I last posted. But school has started and I've been busy with it. I'll try my best to post as frequently as possible. Once again,thank you for reading my works and if you like it please don't forget to like, share and leave your comments. Thank you. Love you guys - U