37. Lazy weekend (Suga pov)

                                    

                                          
a/n: hollllyyyy craaapppp its been foreeevverrrrr!!!!! sorry my schedules kinda whack i will try to do better in the future with posting, probably not as often as i used to, but still. ahh what else what else...sorry this chapters rly not action heavy, i swear i am getting to the main action part of the series now that competitions will start in the next suga pov, but until then i apologize if things are boring. one last quick thing, not to promote my other work at all, but in between this chapter and the last i had the inexplicable urge to write an incredibly specific and angsty semishira series so if anyone is interested in that and my writing, now it exists lol. ok onto the story, sorry for the wait! (also i dont own the coverart, and ACarpet it wouldnt let me at you here but ill put the link for my dorm simp wall in a comment to the right LOL)
                          
I still wasn't used to waking up next to another human. I spent so many years isolating myself from them in minor ways that to sleep next to someone, something so intimate really, was still a huge novelty, even though it seemed to have become the norm when Tooru and I were staying at the other's house. I still wanted to freak out, to push him away–kind of–but I would stop myself, realize where I was and who I was with, and settle back down, into Tooru's chest, further into his embrace, and try to go back to sleep (sometimes I instinctively woke up early, for one reason or another). It was still pitch black outside, so it was fairly early.
                          
   As I shuffled around, very slowly, lest I wake Tooru any earlier than necessary, I silently wished there was at least some light so I could study Tooru better. Sometimes I really just wanted to stare at him. And then keep staring. And could anyone blame me? He was like, super handsome, I mean how did I end up with him again? But, aside from that, his face had become synonymous with comfort, he was my comfort when I had so few others.
                          
   Lost in thought, I must have accidentally moved too much or something, because a moment later Tooru was shifting and sleepily murmuring, "Good morning beautiful." I became grateful it was still all dark.
                          
   "I wish there was some light in here so I could see you blushing," Tooru sighed mournfully and he moved slightly away so he could lay more on his side and face me as I did the same.
                          
   "I–I'm not blushing!" I insisted (very convincingly). I didn't need the light to see the look in Tooru's eyes as he replied, "Surrrreeeee Kou-chan, whatever you say." As my eyes began to adjust to the dark, I could just make out his teasing gaze. I weakly glared at him (of course it only made him laugh).
                          
   After we settled into a silence, Tooru asked, "You didn't wake up from a nightmare, did you?" The tone in his voice had changed. It was more serious, and I could tell he was trying to keep it light still, not wanting to make me feel bad or anything, but I was no fool and I heard the somber undertones clear as day. But it didn't set me off or anything, it just...made me feel good to know Tooru was concerned about me.
                          
   "No. No nightmares tonight. Just...biological clock I guess." I mumbled back, smiling a bit when I saw Tooru's face soften when I informed him there were no nightmares.
                          
   "What time is it?" He yawned, reaching to his bedside table for his phone. "It is...4:27. 4:27, oh my god Koushi, tell me you don't wake up at like, 4:30 every day, please?" He whined as he placed his phone back on the nightstand, muttering something about not needing to wake up for another two and a half hours.
                          
   "Only on morning practice days I suppose..." I answered as Tooru groaned, moving closer to me again–alright that was another thing, all the contact. Like I had said, I was still getting used to any kind of touching, sure, but once I got past that, there was the...the...the novelty and...nervousness? that came with touching my boyfriend. Like, who would've thought I of all people would be sharing a bed with my boyfriend at the beginning of the year, let alone even have a boyfriend?? It was kind of like a surreal dream, except this wasn't a dream, this was real, Tooru was real, and he was really mine.