michael knocks on the door gently, not wanting to scare his boyfriend. "calum, baby? i got you some water and cut up some fruit for you."
he didn't hear a response and sighed. he cracked open the door and frowned at the sight of calum in bed. his back was facing the doorway and michael could feel calum's depressed feelings radiating in the room.
it was often that calum had bad days. some are worse than others. his depression would get the best of him and would paralyze him to isolation. of course, michael wouldn't let him suffer alone. while he gave calum the space he wanted and needed, he still comes by to check on him and to show that him that he is loved.
michael shuts the door behind him and crawls on the bed. he puts the straw from the cup near calum's mouth and smiles when he drinks from it. once calum finishes, he slowly sits up and takes the bowl of fruit and fork from michael. he eats a piece of strawberry and grimaces.
"i feel nauseous." calum mumbles, placing the bowl on his lap.
"well, you haven't eaten all day love. we can wait for the water to settle and try eating again." michael offers, but really telling calum what he's going to do. he has to eat and stay hydrated.
calum just nods and curls into the blanket. he's thankful that michael understands his depression, but he can't help but feel like a burden. he should be able to take care of
himself. michael should be able to do whatever he wants without worrying about him. calum should be able to get up and eat and drink himself, but he can't. not today, at least.
calum wouldn't wish depression on his worst enemy.
he closes his eyes as his boyfriend traces shapes on his cheek. he feels michael's finger make a heart shape and calum can't help the small smile on his lips. he draws a heart on michael's thigh back, returning the silent 'i love you'.
after a few more minutes, calum sits back up and tries to eat again. he manages to eat a few more pieces of fruit before his stomach starts hurting again. he mumbles apologies, but michael ignores him and instead whispers words of encouragement. the fact that calum got up himself and willing ate was a big accomplishment. it may seem small to the one who is suffering, but to the other it's not.
"do you want to be alone now?" michael asks softly.
calum shakes his head and tightens his grip on his lovers arm. "stay, please."
"okay baby. can i turn on the fan? it's quite warm in here." michael asks, not wanting to disturb or change calum's isolated space.
calum just nods, glad that michael asked because he was getting a little warm himself. being tucked under the blanket almost all day was not helping his body temperature. he feels a little sticky from sweating earlier, but he'll just shower tomorrow.
michael gets up and flicks on the switch to turn on the ceiling fan. he keeps the light off as the natural light from the sun keeps the room dim. calum like the room to be dim when he's having a bad day. he says it's to help him know that he's not the only one feeling bad. michael doesn't know if that is the most cutest or heartbreaking thing he has ever heard.
michael crawls back into the bed and give calum his space. however, his boyfriend mumbles something that he can't understand. "what did you say honey?"
calum clears his throat and his cheeks blush pink as he repeats himself. "can you hold me? i-i know you like to be the little spoon, b-but i just really want-"
michael cuts off his rambling. "you don't have to explain yourself love. c'mere." he motions to calum, and he immediately scoots closer to michael. he turns his back to michael so that the younger boyfriend could properly spoon him. he sighs in content as he feels michael's arms around him, squeezing him softly and a kiss to the back of his head.
he'll be okay.
___________
sorry that these are so gloomy. it's all i can write at the moment. kinda good therapy too.
