Chapter 20 | The Idea

                                    

                                          
It had been three weeks since Remus and I had gotten together, and there was one thought that plagued my mind.
                          
Him being a werewolf.
                          
I literally could not care less if he was a werewolf, or a vampire, or a spider (actually, I might have minded a bit at that), but I hated that the others were able to help him while I wasn't.
                          
I wanted to help him when he needed it most. I wanted to become an Animagus.
                          
"Absolutely not," Remus said when I brought the idea up with the Marauders.
                          
I narrowed my eyes at him.
                          
"And why not?" I argued. "They do it. Why can't I?"
                          
"Because they did it without my knowing, and it was a very stupid idea," Remus growled.
                          
James coughed and we both turned our attention to him.
                          
"Sorry to break up this lovers' quarrel," he said. "But you don't hurt us, so why would you hurt Y/n?"
                          
"I just want you to be safe," Remus said.
                          
"I will be safe," I countered. "I'll be an animal. Things will be fine. I just want to help you, Remus."
                          
Remus sighed deeply and didn't say anything for a moment.
                          
"Fine," he muttered.
                          
I smiled at him, and the corner of his mouth twitched upwards.
                          
"So, how do I become an Animagus?" I asked.
                          
"Well... we took the book from the restricted section," James said. "So we'll just have to wait until night-time."
                          
So that's what we did. As soon as the clock struck midnight, James and I ventured out of the tower under the invisibility cloak. He held the Marauders' Map while I held my lit wand out.
                          
"Ow! That was my foot!" I whisper-yelled.
                          
"Sorry," James muttered.
                          
We eventually made it to the library. We entered the restricted section and took off the cloak. James muttered Lumos and his wand tip lit up.
                          
"Alright, stay close so that if a teacher comes, we can hide under the cloak," James whispered. "I'll continue checking the map every now and then."
                          
I looked at the covers of the many books. My fingers grazed over the spines. I saw Moste Potente Potions, Magick Moste Evile... but nothing to do with Transfiguration or Animagus.
                          
"Hey, Y/n, I think I found it!" James whispered.
                          
I walked over to him and looked at the book he was holding out. It was titled, Transformation for the Wild, and had a worn cover.
                          
"This is the book we used," James told me. "C'mon, get back under the cloak."
                          
I did as he asked and held the book close to my chest while James looked at the map. He led us out of the library, and I checked to make sure our feet weren't visible.
                          
We made it all the way back to the common room without any trouble.
                          
"You got the book?" Sirius asked when we walked through the portrait hole (the Fat Lady was very upset to be awoken at forty minutes past midnight).
                          
"Yep," I said, squishing myself next to Remus on an armchair.
                          
He automatically wrapped his arm around my shoulders and kissed my cheek.
                          
James opened the book and began to read the steps aloud.
                          
"Step one: carry a single Mandrake leaf in your mouth for an entire month – from full moon to full moon to be precise. If you swallow the leaf or remove it from your mouth at any point, you have to start the entire process again. You then have to find a small crystal phial that receives the pure rays of the moon, put your saliva-filled leaf inside, and add one of your own hairs.
                          
"Step two: add a silver teaspoon of dew from a place that neither sunlight nor human feet have touched for a full seven days. You then have to add the chrysalis of a Death's-head Hawk Moth to the crystal phial as well. Then put this mixture in a quiet, dark place and leave it alone until the next electrical storm. And really leave it alone – don't even look at it. Don't even think about looking at it.
                          
"Step three: while waiting for the storm, you must place your wand tip over your heart every sunrise and sundown and speak the following incantation: 'Amato Animo Animato Animagus'. If you keep repeating your incantation, there will come a time when, with the touch of the wand-tip to the chest, a second heartbeat may be sensed. Don't change anything. Keep going. Keep waiting for that storm.
                          
"Step four: As soon as lightning appears in the sky, go to the place where you've hidden your crystal phial. If you've done everything right, then you will discover a mouthful of blood-red potion inside it. Then move somewhere where you aren't going to alarm anyone or place yourself in physical danger during your transformation. 
                          
"Step five: Place your wand-tip against your heart and speak the incantation 'Amato Animo Animato Animagus' and drink the potion. You will then feel fiery pain and an intense double heartbeat.
                          
"Step six: the shape of the creature into which you will shortly transform will appear in your mind. You must show no fear. It is too late now, to escape the change you have willed.
                          
"Step seven: When your transformation is complete, you are strongly advised to pick up your wand and hide it somewhere safe, so you can find it post-transformation. To return to human form, visualise your human self as clearly as you can. Do not worry if you don't change back immediately, with practice, you will be able to slip in and out of your animal form at will, simply by visualising the creature. Once you're an advanced Animagus, you should be able to transform without your wand.
                          
"And those are all the steps," James said, handing to book over to me to read.
                          
I skimmed over the pages and looked at the warnings. There were a few, but I was still determined to do this.
                          
"When did you guys have a Mandrake leaf in your mouth?" I asked. "For a whole month?"
                          
"Remember when we made the bet about who could stay quiet for the longest?" Sirius asked.
                          
"Of course I remember," I said. "Best month of my life."
                          
Sirius threw a pillow at me.
                          
"We had the leaves in our mouths then," he said. "We could probably do the same thing for you."
                          
I nodded and looked over the pages again.
                          
"This is illegal, you know," James said. "We're all unregistered."
                          
"I know," I said. "But I want to help. I can do it."
                          
I looked to Remus and smiled softly at him. His arms tightened around my waist, and I rubbed a comforting hand up and down his arm.
                          
I was going to do this. If only for him.