the aftermath

                                    

                                          
TW: gun violence, death 
Y/N
Y/n moved quicker than she ever had before, stepping in front of Bucky, and protecting him in an instant. He fought to get in front of her but she was determined, pushing him back. 
"Father" she spoke through gritted teeth. 
"Y/n" he tipped his balding head toward her in greeting. 
"How did you manage to get out of prison?" 
He ignored her, instead waving his gun at Bucky, "I see you've become quite attached to the Barnes boy...You've presented me with a great opportunity really Y/n, all I had to do once your little tape leaked was pair up with these nice people here and make plans to get you back."
"I'll never go anywhere with you again, you're a monster" she spat. 
"You see daughter, you will really, because if you don't I'll kill him right now. Oh," he teased as pain sprung to her eyes, "I can see how much that hurts you, so as your father, I hate to do it really, but of course, it is your own fault that you've gone and fallen in love with him in the first place. And you have, haven't you, moncoeur?" 
Bucky went still behind her, his hands on her waist a comforting weight as her father's sickening words threatened all that was good, all that was growing between them. 
"You're threatening him?" Y/n rage flooded her ears, "Really?" 
"Don't you remember what I taught you huh? To love is to be weak..." 
She glared at him, oblivious the the footsteps approaching beside her. 
"This was not the plan Maurice..." the woman's sharp voice spoke, "We want James alive..."
"Well you see dear," his grin malicious, "I don't really care what you want at all" 
BANG!
The shot rang through the air and was immediately followed by others, all of which missed their targets. Y/n had come to know a gentler version of Bucky since they'd been assigned their mission, one that many people would never get the chance to know, but some spark of the old him, the Winter Soldier, flashed in his eyes the minute she was in danger. They stood back to back, Bucky's aim pointed right at Angelo and Y/n's...right at her father. 
It was a true standoff. Each person glaring at their clear enemy. Except, in a triangle formation of sorts as Angelo's aim was pointed also at Maurice. 
"You—you beast" he roared, "You killed my sister" 
It was a mistake really, a miscalculation on his part, and everything seemed to happen in slow motion. As Angelo shot at Maurice, her father turned slightly away from Y/n to shoot back, leaving him open for a mere second, a second that Y/n took advantage of. 
BANG! BANG! 
The look of pure outrage on his face was enough to make Y/n almost hurl. Disobeying her father the first time was hard enough, killing him was an entirely different game. 
"Ha!" his laugh was manic as he fell to his knees, "You know, you're exactly who I raised you to be daughter, and look how it turned out for me...I should've seen this coming" 
His last breaths were garbled by blood. 
"I'm sorry" she whimpered, reaching for him. 
Her shaky hands pressed on the fatal wound. 
"I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry" she chanted like a prayer, one that would fall on deaf ears for if she somehow wasn't considered a sinner before, she certainly felt like one now. 
Strong arms pulled her up with a whisper, "We've got to get out of here Y/n" 
He pulled her away, quite literally carrying her over his shoulder and out of the room as she struggled. When they reached the car, Bucky sped away, concern lining his eyes as he barked orders to Tony via the phone system embedded in the speakers. Y/n's eyes glazed over as the horror of what she'd done settled in her body. 
Her father was a villain, yes, but did that mean he deserved to die? In all honesty, she wasn't completely sure. As she had pulled the trigger her only thought was protecting herself and Bucky from the same man who was responsible for the death of her mother and sister. But Bucky. What would he think of her now? The mere thought of losing him now shattered her heart again and again and again. Silently, tears slid down her face but she kept her eyes on the road, not daring to look at him as her mind replayed her father's last words, "...you're exactly who I raised you to be daughter."
Her body was on autopilot. It felt to Y/n as if every emotion was heightened and yet, at the same time, she was numb to it all. Yes, she knew logically that Bucky was driving, that he was helping her out of the car with a gentle hand on her back, and that he was slowly ushering her inside as he opened the door to the hotel room, but as her swollen eyes landed on the empty coffee cups sitting innocently on the small table in the suite's foyer, she finally lost it.
She shoved Bucky off of her with as much force as she could muster, "Don't coddle me" 
Their eyes finally met. The look of pure, honest love in Bucky's eyes was all she needed. She crumbled in his arms, feeling safer there than she felt anywhere else in the world. He was surprisingly warm and held her, comforted her, even with the blood that was literally on her hands. 
"Come" he guided her quietly, softly to the bedroom. 
Blood was on Bucky's crisp white shirt too, blood that Y/n only noticed as he stood before her in the dim lamplight. 
"You're bleeding" she stated, hastily moving toward him to unbutton the shirt. 
He let her care for his wound. 
"I didn't even realize you were shot" she admitted, eyes rimmed with guilt. 
"It's okay" he cupped her cheek, his rough hands surprisingly gentle, "I can barely feel it...Super Soldier remember?" 
She let out a weak chuckle. Y/n didn't think there would ever be a time when Bucky would fail to make her feel better. Still, she nursed him, disinfecting it and applying the proper bandages that they luckily had with them. When she finished, she went to the bathroom to wash the blood off her hands. She was startled as she looked in the mirror, seeing the broken, tear-stained woman who was being reflected back at her. 
"It'll get better with time" Bucky's low, rumbling voice diverted her thoughts, "the guilt" 
"Did you kill your father?" Y/n questioned with a raised eyebrow. 
"No Y/n, I haven't" his words were firm but his voice was simply weary, "But you know I've killed my fair share—many of whom were innocents, unlike him" 
She allowed his gaze to pierce hers as she turned, pulling him toward her with a gentle tug so that her back hit the bathroom counter behind where she stood. Her lips grazed his, making him let out a low huff. 
"Y/n..." he warned. 
"What?" she nuzzled her nose along his cheek, her lips following, pressing small kisses across his handsome face, "I want you Bucky, is that so bad?" 
He let out a frustrated murmur as if the thought of stopping her from getting what she wanted personally pained him, "I want you, you know I do, but let's do this any other day, tomorrow even, just let yourself rest doll, you need it"
She pulled back, searching his gaze for something, what she didn't know, yet all she found was more safety, so much that it threatened to overwhelm her entire being. The feeling poured out of her eyes, a broken sob escaping her mouth as Bucky pressed his lips to her forehead. He wiped her tears then, before gifting her their first true kiss.