Accidents Happen - Part 2

                                    

                                          
Lauren's POV
As soon as we reach the hospital I jump out of the car and run inside. There's a woman at the front desk so I quickly go up to her.
"Hi- I'm Lauren Cimorelli- my girlfriend Y/N got into an accident-" I say, out of breath. "Can I see her yet?"
"I'm sorry ma'am, she is still undergoing surgery. Please have a seat and we will let you know when the doctors are done." She points to the waiting room chairs.
Sighing, I nod and take a seat. I need to calm down anyways.
My sisters walk through the front sliding door and sit by me. Christina is directly next to me so she speaks.
"Any news yet?"
I shake my head.
Christina then whispers to me as my other sisters start to do other stuff. "Are you still mad at her?"
"Well, yes, but I think fear is overpowering it right now. Even if I do end things, I still want her to be... alive..."
She nods and pats my shoulder before going on her phone. I close my eyes, imagining the worst possible scenarios. I mean, what else would you think of?
What am I gonna say if she's awake? Is she even gonna remember what happened? What if she slips into a coma? What if she doesn't remember me at all? What if-
Okay. Let's not go there. I open my eyes to see a nurse pointing her hand to a doctor in my direction. Oh shit. Moment of truth.
My begin to play with my hair and bounce my knee as the doctor approaches.
"Miss Cimorelli?" The doctor asks.
"Yes, that's me." I say, fear evident in my voice.
"We managed to successfully treat her wounds, however she is very fragile and will probably be asleep for, maybe, 24 to 48 hours. Her concussion was bad but not enough to see any brain damage, which is good."
"Thank you so much doctor!" I smile, my eyes teary. "Are we allowed to see her?"
"Yes, of course, please just be cautious of the wires and equipment. I'll have my nurse guide you there." 
"Thank you again, doctor." 
"Of course."
The doctor leaves while the nurse guides my sisters and me to Y/N's room. I'm scared to see the damages but I also want to see her safe.
Entering the room, I am met with the sight of my girlfriend wrapped up in many bandages all over her body. Tears instantly fill my eyes and I take a seat next to her bed. Holding her hand, all I can say is "I'm sorry."
I forget that my sisters are also here. "Do you want some time alone with her?" Kath asks, concerned.
I nod. "Thanks."
When the door shuts I start to bawl even more. I let out all of the feelings I've been holding in, hoping that wherever her mind is, she might be able to hear me.
"I'm sorry for not saying 'I love you' back. I love you so, so much. Sometimes I think it harms me more than I'd like to admit. I miss the way things were before, when we were still scared of telling each other how we felt and it was more of a concept and not a burden. We were in love without knowing it. But now I sometimes feel like you don't love me as much as I love you. And I hate how I can still love and worry for you after all of the things you said to me. For the things you didn't do that were important to me. It's like, I want, or maybe even need to move on, but memories of our past make we want to stay and pray to God that one day this weird bump will end. I'm scared that if we break up, you'll be able to move on faster than I am. And that maybe you truly meant it when you said we weren't serious."