It's hard to watch the love of your life spiral into darkness, it's even harder when you cant help.
After Oliver's death, he watches over his boyfriend George as he gets pulled into self-destructive behaviours of grief and pain until one day he sees...
I watched George cautiously get into Clay's car. I didn't have a good feeling about this and apparently neither did George from the constant fidgeting and anxious nail picking. I sat in the back middle seat of the luxurious car, not that either of the men in front of me would know.
The car ride was a sickening silence. The only thing audible was the occasional drumming of Clay tapping his fingers on the steering wheel. The air was so dense that even I was finding it hard to breathe. We drove for about 10 more minutes, the houses we passed were getting gradually more grandeur by the minute.
The car slowly came to a stop as Clay effortlessly parked the car into a driveway. I shifted through the roof of the car while Clay and George stepped out of either side. I noticed George's jaw slightly drop and his eyebrows raised in surprise or shock. I followed his gaze to the house and my face instantly formed to mimick George's
Holy shit.
( A/N: This is what I'm imagining but the wood would be much darker. You can imagine whatever you want <3 )
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"Is there a problem?" Clay questioned, breaking both George and I's trances of awe. "No...none at all. Your house is just...gorgeous~" George responded, not breaking his gaze from the building. "Oh yeah thanks I guess, to be honest, I dont really see what people like about it so much, I would much prefer something much smaller and cozy but my father gifted this to me so I dont have much of a choice about it." he hummed while gesturing for George to follow him into the large estate.
I decided to take a look around by myself while Clay gave George a small tour. The interior was just as, if not more, lavish as the outside. Clay was right, it felt too large and empty even with the fancy furnishments, it didn't feel like a home, more like someone was just living there. If that makes sense.
When I came back I found George and Clay on the large white sofa. Clay was giving George looks of empathy while George kept his eyes down, picking at the hem of his shirt. "-it just been hard losing him..." George mumbled, he must be telling Clay what happened to get to where he is.
I dont have a problem with George sharing my death in fact I'm glad he's opening up except George is normally very closed off and I wouldn't have thought he would have shared his life story with someone he barely knew.
I suppose George would have to be trusting of Clay seeing as he was staying with him for who knows how long.
I chimed back in to listen in on their conversation. "Speaking of Sap and Niki, I should probably let them know I'm okay" George spoke, taking his phone out of his pocket. "Nevermind, it's dead~" George stated, disappointed.
"Oh dont worry, you can borrow my charger, there's one in the kitchen" Clay smiled
"Thanks."
-
George came back a few moments later and returned to his spot on the couch, now without his phone. "So tell me about you, what's your favourite colour? Do you have any pets? What do you do for a living?" George interrogated.
"Uhhh well my favourite colour is green. I have a cat named Patches, she wanders around the house and you'll catch her every now and again. I work in...social media? I'm not sure how to say it but I guess you could say I'm an influencer. I do youtube and stuff" Clay responded thoughtfully, not even taken aback by the flood of questions.
"Oh, that's really cool! What do you film?" George questioned with curiosity. "Well, I play uhm...Minecraft" Clay mumbled out wearily "Oh I love Minecraft! Oli and I play- used to play it together" George responded, hesitating at his words.
"Sorry..." Clay apologised "No no no it's not your fault at all, it's okay" George assured.
"So...tell me about Oliver? You dont have to of course" Clay said with a smile, I noticed George's eyes soften a bit at the mention of my name. "Oli was...well Oli was impossible not to love. I reckon you and him would've gotten along really well~"
I think so too.
"He was an adrenaline junkie, always forcing himself and me to step out of our comfort zones. You would look at him and be captivated by his charm and overall aura, he just seemed like the kind of guy everyone would want to be friends with, but he was also humble and really fucking kind~ like he would go out of his way just to make you smile. I remember this one time before we were dating, I was cheated on by this dickhead and Oli drove an hour to the store and then to my house with a bag full of plates and stuff. We spent that night reminiscing and smashing plates on the rooftop of my apartment. Oli was brave and outgoing~" George broke into sobs, unable to continue.
It hurts to see him talk about me in this way because he still loves me so much and he's clearly not moving on anytime soon. It's okay, I'll be with him the whole way even if he doesn't know it.
Clay pulled George into a hug and George sobbed into his chest. I couldn't help but feel a pang out jealously overtake me, I should be the one holding him, I should be the one comforting him.
But I'm not, I'm fucking dead.
"From what you've told me Oliver was clearly the light of so many peoples lives and I think even though he's passed, his life will always have a huge impact on you and your friend's lives but in the best way possible with all the memories you've shared and the lessons he taught you." Clay comforted, still holding George tightly.
George sniffled, wiping his nose with his sleeve before speaking up between his sobs,
"Sometimes I wish it was me who died because not nearly as many people would have been affected by my death. Oli was too important."
