chapter 14 - you cut and die

                                    

                                          
Thank you @user266
                          
Christens Pov
                          
I just dont think i can do it any more. Always so lonly, ugly and stupid. Blake starts to wake up and opens one eye. " hey babycakes, lets get ready for school and make it our bitch". I make a small chuckel and smile. We get up and i go shower first. After my shower i pick out black skinnies a top with the quote
                          
" if i cry in front of you, im realy hurt. I hate crying in front of people. I feel week like im begging for attention and sympathy and im not this kind of person" And black vans. I look at Black and take a look at what hes wereing blue skinnes black top black vans and a blue beanie. " hey you ready to go babycakes". I node and we make are way to school.
                          
As we hop out of the car all eyes are on us as we walk with are head up and not down. I plan to live my last day not looked down upon. Yes, when i have PE im going into the bathroom and killing myself. Its not like anybody will miss me, Blake's just trying to be nice, im all alone, my family is dead , i have nobody, at leas when i die ill see my mom.
                          
Time skip to PE
                          
As all the girls walk out of the lockerroom I make my way to the bathroom . I kick open all the stalls to see if anyone is there and lok the dore. I reach into my bag and pull out my razors, paper and pen along with the pills. I wright a note to blake.
                          
Dear Blake
                          
Hey baby, im sorry i did this, its not youre fulght, you did not know i was this broken. You tryed to fix me but i just cant be fixed, The only person who truly loves me is my mom. I'll be gon, youll be happy, Ill be happy, youll have a nice family with your future husband and ill be dead with my mom, i deserver it afterall. go be happy. for me
                          
Love: Your dead bestfriend Christen 
                          
I pop open the bottle and swolow all of the pills and open up every cut on my body including my thighs , feet, arm stomach ect. As i here the sounds of a person knocking on the dore I see black spots and then im passed out.
                          
I open my eyes and see my body in the bodybag along with Blake breaking down. I here footsteps behind me and i turn around to be face to face with my mother. "Why, why did you do it baby". I run over to her and cry my eyes out and explain to her why.
                          
" Im so sorry mom i really am i just could not handal it, i was all alone nobody to love and nobody to love me". " hey honey its okay whats done is done".
                          
A/n yes i know and im sorry i was away for so long i just hade school work and speeches and a hella lot of tests. song is give me love by ed sheeran i have a new book out with 2 chapters out. Jock and nerd, vote like comment 
                          
love you my purple monkeys