Enough

                                    

                                          
I wake up to the smell of coffee and Yelena being replaced by a pillow. I get up change back into my own clothes and then walk around to find Yelena making coffee and pancakes. 
                          
"Good morning, how'd you sleep?" she said cheerful "Morning, I slept well but I had a really weird dream." I state and Yelena looks intrigued. "About what?" she said with thrill. "I kind of dreamt that after Russian class I went to my professors apartment to get tutored but instead I befriended her by getting her number and then I cooked dinner and then we watched scary movies and cuddled because I was scared." Yelena laughed "What a coincidence! I had a similar dream but I was the professor." I chuckle and sit down Yelena hands me the cup of coffee. 
                          
"So are you sick of me yet? Or are we going to study today?" Yelena asks while flipping a pancake, I nod "We should at least look through some of that stuff today" I say Yelena placed a stack of pancakes in front of me and another next to me. She sat down and we started eating. 
                          
"These are so good" I say after a while Yelena looks at me and smiles "Thanks but your dinner yesterday was better, you're a great cook." she said not taking the compliment I roll my eyes "Do you ever accept compliments?" I smirk as I earn a chuckle from Yelena. 
                          
Once we finished eating Yelena was looking at me with a smirk "What?" I look at her confused "You have syrup on your face" she says keeping that smirk on her face. "Where?" I questioned she swiftly wiped the syrup away from the corner of my top lip but she left her hand on my face for a moment and we locked eyes I felt a tingling sensation in my stomach and then it just happened.. 
                          
She kissed me and I kissed back but we quickly pulled apart "I'm sorry! This.. fuck this is so wrong." Yelena rambled while I just stared at her. "Y-You should go. Yeah. I have a bunch of work to do. You have to go." she kept rambling but raising her tone a bit "What?. but.." I got cut off "Go. You need to leave Y/n, get out." she said in a strict manner "But-" I get cut off again "I SAID GET OUT! A-AND LOOSE MY NUMBER!" I backed up into a corner I felt my eyes burn so I quickly screw them shut before the tears could fall. 
                          
Once Yelena realized that she scared me she lowered her tone and tried to come up to me "Y/n I'm sorry I-" "N-No! Just don't. I-I don't want to hear any of it!" I yell out between sobs as best I can before grabbing my stuff and running out of her apartment. 
                          
I looked around I didn't know where exactly I was but the place seemed fermiliar, I called an uber and as I drove back I deleted Yelena's number like she requested. 
                          
Once I arrived I sat in my dorm all day and didn't really do much even if I was angry at Yelena it still felt lonely and cold in my dorm room. When Yelena yelled at me it brought up memories I had worked so hard to push down. My Parents. When I turned 15 I moved in with my grandparents because my parents were abusive and I finally had gotten enough proof for the police to get away from them. I tried over and over since age 10 to get away from them by running away or staying at friends houses or even on the streets but they played their roles so well in public and in front of everyone who asked anything about my bruises they
played the perfect parents but in the house when it was just me and them they'd yell and beat me for every mistake that's also the reason I didn't really believe in love and of course the one time I opened up to someone.. he cheated on me with my best friend. 
                          
Now I was done. I was never good enough for anyone. Not even myself.
                          
It was Monday. Russian.. I couldn't stand the thought of seeing Yelena so I skipped.
                          
Yelena's POV
Class started but Y/n didn't show up I was hoping that she was late or something like that, I had to apologize. The way she looked at me when I raised my voice, her eyes were full of fear. I didn't mean to scare her like I did. I was scared myself.. I don't know why I kissed her.. It just felt right I suppose but it was wrong. 
                          
I had to keep reminding myself that she was my STUDENT whatever our relationship was it couldn't be more than a friendship no matter how much I wanted it to be more. I didn't even know if she liked me back. But I knew that I had to at least apologize. 
                          
I tried texting her but she blocked my number and I didn't know which dorm room was hers so I had to wait until she came to class but considering that she wanted to quit, she might be talking to the principal about it right now! 
                          
I was praying she wasn't, I truly did admire how she was there for Russian unlike the boys. I just developed feelings for her but that didn't change the fact that I wanted to help her.
                          
Y/n's POV
                          
TIME SKIP
                          
Friday which meant that there was that test today as much as I didn't want to go I still studied for that stupid test all week and was interested in seeing if it really was just the strain of only learning all the time and if that down time did help my brain relax a bit and not forget everything. 
                          
So I did go to class of course I was still a bit anxious for the test but I also just really didn't want to see Yelena.
                          
After PE I made the effort to change and put a revealing dress on, on purpose hoping that the boys staring would distract me from Yelena and I planned to play the player for now. 
                          
When I entered the room I instantly felt the boys eyes on me and to my luck Yelena wasn't there yet  "Where's Ms. Belova?" I asked the boys "She said that she had to print out our tests, cutie." one of them answered with a smirk, a handsome one too. 
                          
I smirked back seeing that there was an open seat next to him "Can I sit there?" I ask pointing to the seat next to him. He nods. I strut up next to him "Back up" I tell him and he backs up with his chair, I sit down on his lap and the other boys "ooh" at us, I hear footsteps and the boys quiet down indicating that Yelena entered the room, I kiss the boys cheek and move to the seat next to him and he wrapped his arm around me, I smirk and glance at Yelena for a moment, her face was priceless. 
                          
She looked pissed, I held the guys hand and she somehow she managed to look even more pissed after that. She handed out the tests. Mine had a note attached. "Talk after class" was written on it. I rolled my eyes and started the test. 
                          
When I went to give my test to Yelena I took my pen with me. When she took the paper out of my hand I 'dropped' my pen, she wanted to pick it up for me but I quickly bent down and grabbed it myself. I felt the eyes of the guys on my ass. I got back up slower than I bent down. "Keep your eyes on your tests and learn some manners." Yelena said sternly. 
                          
I smirked at her and went back to my seat and took the guys hand again. Yelena glared at me the whole time. The lesson ended and I stayed like she wanted but the guy who I sat next to stood by the door. "I need to talk to Y/n. It'll take a while. You can leave." she blurted out clearly pissed. 
                          
I smirked at the boy and grabbed a pen "give me your hand" I demanded he held out his hand I wrote my number down on his wrist kissed him on the cheek "Text me. I'll see you later." he gave me a genuine smile and a wink I smirked at him and he left. 
                          
"What the hell was that!?" Yelena practically yelled making me flinch slightly "sorry." she hummed after. "Why do you care? You were the one who practically kicked me out and yelled at me to lose your number." I said crossing my arms "Because I was scared! You're my student and I kissed you!" she said lowly. 
                          
I scoff "Fear DOESN'T give you the right to yell at me!" I hiss "I know but what was that?! You sat down on HIS LAP!" she hissed back "Are you jealous?!" I laughed "I didn't think you'd get jealous over my little show." "I'm NOT jealous. You're my student I still think that whatever that was at my place was a huge mistake that'll never happen again. It can't. You're my student. You can't seriously think that we could be something." Yelena's words stung. 
                          
They hurt me, I didn't want them to hurt but they did. "of course it's a fucking mistake, to you." a few stray tears escaped from my eyes Yelena wanted to come up to me but I backed up and wiped them away "Y/n-" Yelena wanted to say something but I cut her off "No. You can take your unconditionally infinite bullshit to someone else! For a moment there I thought that I finally was enough for someone. Turns out that I'm not. I never was and I never will be!" I yelled with tears flowing down my face I wasn't sure why I said all that but I did, after I did I got my bag and left.