18

                                    

                                          
⚡COntRol⚡
Chapter 18
                          
The next day...
[Kaminari's POV]
                          
I could hear Mr Aizawa outside, talking to the class. I didn't know how much he was telling them, or what he was telling them, but Recovery Girl had acknowledged my privacy, and repeatedly told me that nothing would be shared with anyone else.
                          
Recovery Girl answers the door when Mr Aizawa had knocked on it, the two exchanging a few words, and seemingly in argument. Maybe over the idea of this being a little overwhelming for me. Beyond the barely opened door, I could hear the chattering of my classmates.
                          
I couldn't say that they did anything wrong. It wasn't their fault for believing my poor lies, exactly as it was for Mr Aizawa. But I could only expect the shower of pity and sympathy that I would get, again making me feel like a charity case.
                          
Almost as if they had drawn to a conclusion, Recovery Girl turns to me with a sympathetic smile that was disguised as 'reassuring', offering me a thumbs up. I meekly nod in return - I have no energy to do anything more. Then, she walks away from the door, Mr Aizawa stepping in and offering me a smile. 
                          
I only acknowledge it, but never return it.
                          
One by one, the whole of class 2-A trickle in, some appearing as if they hadn't slept as well as they should've, others appearing relieved at my presence. There were very mixed emotions in that room. To say the least, however, I did expect Mina to be the one to leap on me first, Sero briskly following afterwards.
                          
"HECK, DENKI! DO YOU KNOW HOW MUCH YOU'D WORRIED US?!" Mina wails into my ear, so loudly that it made me wince from the groan of my eardrum.
                          
"HELL I THOUGHT YOU DIED OR SOMETHING MAN!" Sero wails equally as loud into my other ear, and I was shocked to feel the sheets being soaked with tears from both of their eyes.
                          
I couldn't smile. Not even for them. But I did manage to offer them a hug, both my hands lifting to thread through the back of their heads, one sleek and silky, the other almost like cotton candy. I was almost grateful for them, if it weren't for it all being done out of pity.
                          
I knew everyone here wanted these problems to go away, just for the old Denki to come back.
                          
No one really cared.
                          
One by one, each of them came up to me. Some, much like Mina, had been physical, providing me with an embrace that caused me to feel nothing but obliged to return it. Others, like Iida, only wish me well, knowing better than to overwhelm a patient.
                          
Not that the others were irresponsible - I know they were desperate for answers and seeing me alive was probably a relief.
                          
"Rest up, Kaminari," Todoroki says politely, a faint smile playing with his lips, "You'll find your way back and you'll get better soon."
                          
His words were a little different to what was traditional. Normally, it was others wishing for me to get better. But he... he almost confirms that it would happen. That I will get better.
                          
I wasn't so sure, though. All I feel like I'm doing is sinking, moving further and further away from the surface. I can't see where I'm going, but the pressure and the desperate need for air are crushing me. And, all the same, I want to let go. Give up hope. Accept that things won't get better.
                          
It already felt like it won't.
                          
I've tried for so long to go back to how things were, but I'm not a fighter.
                          
I'm... I'm not a hero.
                          
Still, I manage to smile at Todoroki, watching as he merges back into the crowd that was still waiting to talk to me.