Chapter 19 - Consequences.

                                    

                                          
The atmosphere in the common room that night was strange, Remus was acting normal and so were the girls. Peter just looked nervous, James glanced over at me worridly when he thought I wasn't looking and Sirius wouldn't even meet my eye. Part of me was wondering if they knew but that didn't make sense, how could they? It was just my guilty conscience. 
"I saw that dog that everyone was talking about today, fed him my sandwich." I smiled and sat down next to Marlene. 
"No way I haven't met him yet!" Lily loved animals and animals loved her, she was the second highest in care of magical creatures next to Remus. 
"What's up with you?" I asked Sirius who had been giving me a hard stare ever since I walked through the portrait hole. 
Sirius crossed his arms and Remus shot him a quick warning look, the way mums do when you misbehave in public. "Oh nothing y/n nothing at all." He said but it wasn't convincing at all. 
"No don't bottle it up, you've been sat there with a face like thunder for half an hour either tell us, or go smoke something until you cheer up." I shrugged. Sirius and I weren't afraid to keep each other in line, we had that honesty with each other. 
Sirius opened his mouth to talk then bit his lip, thats how I knew it would be something offensive. 
"I dont understand why you're being like this have I done something?" I crossed my arms, everyone was silent now. 
"Uh guys let's not-" James of course tried to calm everyone down but Sirius was being so infuriating. 
"No if you've got a problem tell me instead of sitting there sulking like a child." I sighed. 
Sirius stood up "Right then I'll go and sulk in the comfort of my own dorm perhaps."
"Oh my god why are you being like this it's like you're trying to cause an argument." I really wasn't used to arguing with Sirius and I didn't like it one bit. 
"I'm not being like anything!" 
"You're being a little bitch!"
"You don't seem to mind that, just look at your boyfriend!" He snapped and his eyes widened as he realized what he said. Oh my. It all made sense. Every part of the puzzle clicked into place. Sirius was the dog, he was an animagus. 
"Oh my- Sirius let's just talk about this I didn't mean for you to find out like tha- wait you were spying on me as a fucking dog!? What the hell! Jesus I didn't realize you were that plain dishonest and sneaky and-" 
"Don't talk to me about dishonest and sneaky!" Sirius cut in "You're dating my brother! Of all people, my brother! You're supposed to be my friend Y/n, you're so shit!" He yelled then stormed off up to his dorm. I stood there for a second, stunned into silence like the others. That was my best friend Sirius Black. That one was alot of damage. 
"Y/n he doesn't mean that," James said softly "he's just annoyed." 
"No I deserve it." I bit my lip holding back tears "God, what have I done?" I sighed and held my face in my hands so the others couldn't see me cry. "I'm gonna go get some snacks." I quickly turned around and speed walked out of the common room. 
I got into an empty corridor and sat against a wall and just cried letting it all out. Sirius hated me because I loved Regulus. I loved them both so much, it wasn't like I got to choose who to fall in love with. And if I did get to choose he really thought I would choose to love his brother? I quickly dried my eyes when I heard foot steps and sniffed standing up, it was Marlene. "Oh darling come here." She  softly and pulled me into a hug.
This act of kindness made me lose it completely and I sobbed into her shoulder, I wasn't worthy of love when I was such a bad friend. "I don't know what to do Marls. Sirius hates me now. I love them both." Marlene, Lily and James, those were the only people I was this vulnerable around. They were just so good at being comforting and they gave good hugs.