Children are still such an sensitive topic that I tense at his mention. 
I want family especially cause I thought I'd never be able to have my own. But I know that Helena isn't ready and that she feels pressured to have babies.
                          
I want to give her a much time as she needs because I understand her anxiety about it all. But I'm also impatient, dreaming about a whole pack of children warming our hearts and one day our home.
She showed chances I never thought I'd had, showed me the beauty in the simplest of things. Is it too much to ask for the whole world and a family with the love of your life? 
                          
"Why does it matter? When I die you're taking Kattegat like we said. My Queen can go back to her Island in no time and find a new spouse." I shurg feeling like I could throw up by the thought of someone else ever touching her like I did. Someone getting to feel her warm embrace like I did. The words I love you falling off her mesmerising lips for someone else. A hot wave of anger washes over me as my own thoughts just ignite the fury buried in me.
                          
"If she agrees to even be your Queen. I see myself as having an incredibly stubborn woman myself. But you caught yourself a Queen that killed her husband to gain power and independence. You should be careful to not cage her as well. She won't fly away but gut you if you try." he laughs thinking it's incredibly funny.
                          
As if I didn't know that I caught someone with the southern temperament and the northern beauty all these men keep talking about.
                          
"Let's drink to that." I chuckle already imagining how his warm blood would feel on my hands as I gut him. Helena would never try to kill me to escape my love. At least if I can keep my sins from her. Only the gods know what would happen if she knew what my plans were before I fell in love with her.
                          
We lift the cups to our mouths and as we put them down again he leans back in his throne with suddenly a serious expression.
                          
"While we are at it, I got some news regarding her." he begins which makes my head shoot up.
                          
"I send someone to look how the lands establishes with her." he begins but I quickly cut him off.
                          
"You send spies to look after her?"
I ask feeling anger boil in me. 
                          
If he weren't so essential for my plans I would torture him right here and right now. I see him as a friend of sorts but how dare he watch after Helena like that.
                          
"To make sure she wouldn't fall into our backs. But as it turns out she doesn't seem in the condition to do so."
                          
"What do you mean she's not in the condition?" I ask feeling fear creep into the back of my mind. What if my dreams came true and something happened to her? What if she's lieing on her deathbed and I'mnot there to hold her hand?
                          
"She must be sick they said she's as pale as a ghost and thin like a slave." he answers like he enjoyed it. Of course he does; she's nothing more than a threat to him. My special little warrior that would kill him in no time.
                          
I look up to him hoping to get more answers out of him but he keeps silent for a while. Then he speaks again, even more serious.
                          
"They say she's gone mad, that she's not master of her senses." he answers seeing the worry in my eyes.
                          
"But what does mad really ean these days? I would easily use the term on Astrid as well though I think it's my child thats making her act like this." he chuckles trying to loosen the tension in here.