Chapter 38

                                    

                                          
College dorms are small, so we decorated every inch.
Everything in Rhoda's room became a prop. The clouds on her ceiling became spider webs. The shower became a bloody crime scene. The kitchen was decked out with glossy white pumpkins and small plastic crows hiding among branches. Blood bags filled with drinks were served on ice.
Candles and LED's lit the room in shades of orange and purple when the lights were turned off. I just hoped no one would drunkenly knock one of the candles over and set the dorm on fire.
I ended up doing most of the decorating while Rhoda texted last minute details to our guests and set out snacks. I didn't mind this arrangement. The methodical task of stretching cobwebs over kitchen cabinets gave me something to distract myself from everything else filling my brain.
Sarah and I hadn't spoken since our conversation outside the caf, and I hadn't tried texting either. Mostly because I wanted to give her space, but also because part of me didn't want to know if I had been blocked. I didn't think I could handle seeing our blue iMessages suddenly go green.
Sarah had always been the one to start conversations in the past. If she wanted to text me, I told myself, she knew what my number was.
I was filling a cup with eyeball ping pong balls for beer pong when Rhoda came into the kitchen. She grabbed an orange Cheeto puff from the open bag on the counter. "How's it going?"
I set the cup of eyeballs down and took a handful of Cheetos, figuring I could use a break as well. "Good," I reported. "I see the vision coming together."
Rhoda stood back, tilting her head, and looked around the kitchen. "Do you think it's too over-the-top? I don't want this to look like a kids' party." She used her Cheeto to gesture to the life-size mannequin body hanging by a rope from the ceiling. "Do you think people will think I'm trying too hard?"
I grinned and gave the hanging mannequin a friendly push. "I think it's cool. Besides, everyone's gonna be too busy getting wasted to judge your choice of decor."
She frowned and munched on the Cheeto before returning for seconds. "I hope so. Dude, I'm so stressed. Can you ask your boyfriend to bring some weed over?"
"Woah, woah, woah!" I said. "Big no-no."
"What?" Rhoda laughed. "The weed or calling him your boyfriend?"
"What do you think?"
She just grinned at me and crossed to the sink to fill a glass with water.
"I mean, he has a girlfriend." I said the word hushed like someone would overhear. "I'm basically the mistress."
"Jesus, Ben." Rhoda took a sip of her water. "He's not bringing her here, is he?"
"Oh, no," I assured her quickly. "She's not really the party type." Then I paused. Bringing Heather along was just the type of wack shit Michael might pull.
Rhoda rolled her eyes. "Listen, I'm not trying to tell you what to do. And I'm not coming from some morally-righteous angle because I've done fucked up things too. But if this guy doesn't get his act together, you really should..." She trailed off, ending her point with a meaningful nod.
"I know, I know," I sighed. Shoveled down a mouthful of Cheetos. "You're not the first person to tell me that. I've just... never been in a situation like this."
"You mean where there's a third person involved?"
"I mean where I actually like someone." The Cheetos were starting to taste like ash in my mouth. "My relationships in high school were so superficial. You know, just someone to take to the homecoming dance. I've never been in love."