new beginnings

                                    

                                          
JJ's POV 
"Hey Em. It's been a year now. I feel bad. It's my fault this happened. I miss you. I wanted to say goodbye. I never got to. You died before I could say goodbye."
                          
I laid the flowers I had brought on the stone sign. There were multiple bouquets. 
                          
Emily Jean Prentiss
Beloved hero, friend and daughter
                          
"I took Penelope's advice and asked out someone. He's nice. Although his accent is kinda bad. You would hate it." I laughed. 
                          
"Elle and Spencer have become closer if you can believe it. Garcia told me all about how they got caught in a broom closet together. She said Spencer turned so red."
                          
"Pen is good. She has a new boyfriend she met at a coffee shop. She helped fix his computer. I think they have a date planned soon."
                          
"David gave me pasta recipes to practice. I think they turned out great. I didn't burn anything."
                          
"Work is good. Everyone knows what happened so they have been nice. Andy wanted me to say thanks."
                          
"You can rest. We're okay. We have each other. We love you and miss you and want you here. But you can sleep." I finished. 
                          
"Oh darling, I am so sorry. I didn't know you were here. Do you want to have more time?" Penelope took me by surprise. 
                          
"No thanks. I am all finished. She has a nice garden from everyone today." I laughed looking at the pile of flowers. 
                          
"She's okay now. I love you sweetie." She said before I left. 
                          
The next day I went to get ready for my date. We planned on getting Italian. I threw on a nice red dress. It wasn't too slutty but I looked hot still. 
                          
"You look great." My date said when I got in the car. I thanked him and we left on our way. 
                          
"Reservation for Will." He said at the restaurant. We were led to the back of the restaurant and ordered wine. 
                          
"So tell me about yourself." I said. I learned he grew up in New Orleans and stayed there until getting transferred to DC. 
                          
We went back and forth exchanging stories about our childhood. It took some getting used to, but the accent was okay. 
                          
"I had a lovely time today Will. Thank you for taking me." I said back at my apartment. Normally I would have kissed him, but I'm not ready. 
                          
"Thanks for coming. I've been wanting this a while." He said. I smiled and nodded. "We should do it again sometime." 
                          
"Sure. You have my number. Let's plan a movie or something." I told him. "Mamma Mia is playing at that drive-in this month. We should go." He offered. 
                          
"We'll see. Goodnight." I said before turning in and locking the door. 
                          
I slid down the door and hugged my knees. "What the fuck? I was fine. I am fine. I'm over it." I cried. In my opinion, I shouldn't be crying every time I'm reminded of her. 
                          
Emily's POV 
All the dialogue would be in German but I don't feel like translating. 
                          
"I am aware that you feel that way. Maybe if you got your head out of your ass you would see that isn't the case." 
                          
I had gotten in a fight with someone almost every case I worked on. Today someone was complaining that his partner was using her maternity leave wrong. 
                          
"Well she shouldn't be shopping." Was his argument. Apparently if you have a kid you have to only care for it. 
                          
"She pushed a nine pound baby out of her vagina, she can do whatever she wants." I pushed him out of my office before chugging the rest of my coffee. 
                          
The day was over by 6 so I ran to the grocery store before heading home. It wasn't far so I walked. Normally I caught the bus but it was nice out. 
                          
I needed a lot. I started in the veggie aisle, went to get my snacks, grabbed the meats and dairy and stood in front of the chips. 
                          
"What are you getting?" A guy next to me asked. "I don't know, right now I'm thinking Cheetos. But I don't think I deserve them." 
                          
He was puzzled and asked about it. "An ex loved Cheetos and I treated her like shit."
                          
"Ahh. Exes always ruin things for everyone. She probably treated you like shit but you were to in love to realize." He said. I grabbed a bag and walked to the register. 
                          
"She was perfect." I threw at him. Something about claiming JJ treated me like shit pissed me off. 
                          
"Did I say something wrong?" He chased after me. "Don't assume things." I said and kept waking. 
                          
"Woah, let me make it up to you." 
                          
"I'm good."
                          
"She's better off without you." He spat and walked off. I went to check out, walked back to my apartment and put my things away. 
                          
I opened a bottle of wine and drank straight from the bottle. Kinda felt like crying so I put in Mamma Mia and just bawled. 
                          
Normally I would invite Elle over to get wasted but I hadn't made any friends like that yet. 
                          
The only friends I've made were coworkers. I haven't had that instant connecting here. I've been hoping for one though. 
                          
I have to start adjusting. It's already been a year. I need to get people. Anyone.