eighteen

                                    

                                          
after everything that happened with his mother, from the lunch to the unnecessary therapy session that was forced onto him, karl agreed to dinner at his parent's house. the only reason that persuaded him to go was that his father was back in town. plus, he hasn't seen his brother, sean, in a while. 
                          
it's been pretty tense the whole night, with the atmosphere so thick you could cut it with a knife. forced smiles and clipped sentences were shared between karl and his mother. karl's father had barely spoken and sean poked around at his food, unsure whether to say something or not. karl could tell from the look on his mother's face, she has something to tell him. he's not sure, but she was for sure hiding something.
                          
karl just wants to fall into a deep dark hole and never come out. he should've never let that doctor 'evaluate' him. he should have told them to leave a lot sooner than he did. he didn't and now he's stuck with his mom who is even more concerned about his well-being. his father had been out of town so he hadn't been caught up fully with the situation, but the tenseness on his face only deepened the small wrinkles on his forehead. he knew only part of the story. 
                          
when karl arrived, his father met him at the door and offered a simple, 'i'm so sorry about your mother's overreaction.'
                          
karl wished everything would go away. he wished to see sapnap for real, just to prove to his mother that he wasn't crazy, that sapnap was real. he wants to touch sapnap for real, hold him, even kiss him. 
                          
kiss him.
                          
karl can't believe that they were dating now. how on earth is he supposed to tell his parents that him and sapnap are dating? his mother would think he was too far gone, too obsessed with this 'made-up' person.
                          
at least they can't stop him from meeting sapnap every night.
                          
"k-karl?" sean timidly asked, pulling his brother out of his thoughts. karl turned to look at his brother, who seemed to have been battling with an internal struggle.
                          
"yeah?" karl replied, taking a bite of the chicken they were having.
                          
sean's eyes darted over to their mother, who wore a glare that was directed toward him. 
                          
"nevermind."
                          
confusion splattered itself on karl's face before he shrugged and looked back down at his plate, avoiding eye contact with his mother.
                          
"sweetie," his mother began, placing her fork down on her napkin. "i spoke to doctor davidson and he recommended some medicine for you." he opened his mouth to retaliate, but his mother held up a hand. a small white pill bottle is gestured in his direction to take, but he doesn't take it from the owner's hand. his mother sat it down on the table in front of him instead. 
                          
"karl, your mom just wants the best for you," his father finally says, and the tension present was unmistakeable. "she doesn't want to see you struggle."
                          
"i'm not struggling with anything," he snapped, "sapnap has made me feel the best i have in a while. i'm only 'struggling' because your wife thinks that i can't take care of myself when you aren't around." his mother was the only one with a worried expression on his face.
                          
"i know son. it would have been different if i was home when she made the decision. my hands are tied." his father lied, gritting his teeth. it wouldn't have been different. his mother was the head of the household. she was the almighty ruler who made the final decision. 
                          
"i still have my job. i still pay my bills on time. i still hang out with my friends. i'm still me! i'm not any different jesus!" karl exclaimed, slamming his hands down on the edge of the table, startling his brother, who was sitting right next to him. 
                          
"you aren't yourself karl! it's not healthy to mix your dreams with reality," his mother argued. "we care about you sweetheart." a bitter taste entered his mouth as he heard 'sweetheart' leave his mother's mouth. 
                          
"don't call me sweetheart."
                          
"karl-" his father sighed, rubbing his face in defeat.
                          
"sapnap is real. he's everything to me." 
                          
his mom's eyes widened at the statement. "honey, you can just become... obsessed with someone who you haven't even met!" 
                          
"that doesn't matter," karl said, venom lacing every word that leaves his mouth. "i may have never met him in real life, but that doesn't change how i feel about him." the statement shocked the three people around him. his mother was the most surprised.
                          
karl didn't mean to let that slip. 
                          
"sweetie, you don't mean-"
                          
"yes," he said, gritting his teeth. "think whatever you want, but i'm not taking the medication." His mother sighed deeply before looking at the other two males in the room.
                          
"guess i won't be getting anywhere with this," his mother said cooly, which only made karl's anger go over the edge. 
                          
karl glared his mother down from across the table, trying his hardest to not throw himself across the table at her. he can't believe he accidentally exposed how he felt about sapnap to his family. there's no way he would be taking the prescribed medication.
                          
karl was fine.
                          
"i'm leaving," karl announced, standing up from the table. 
                          
his family watched as he exited the dining room and stormed out the front door. a huge slam following after him.