Cared For

                                    

                                          
Practice was coming to a mid-day break now and you sat in the club room. Remembering how Yamaguchi broke into a triumphant smile after he had landed the Jump Float. The team had gone wild with cheers and Tsukishima was starting in awe and shock. Especially after when he had done it, Yamaguchi had gone and hugged Yachi, who turned red and hugged him back, smiling wide.
                          
You were happy that both of them had left after that to go get ice cream. Your ship had sailed. Kiyoko was simply brimming with excitement after that as well. You quietly escaped to the club room. The excitement was too much for you. So you sat in silence for a while, listening to music. 
                          
To your surprise, Asahi, Daichi, and Sugawara had followed you, "Hey, you did great there!" Suga said, startling you out of your reverie. 
                          
"I did nothing but pull out what was already there." You said as you took off your headphones.
                          
"It isn't easy to do that. Trust me, I know." Daichi said.
                          
Asahi continued, "Even god can only give you his love and gifts. Using them and your bringing out your potential is something you need to by yourself."
                          
A guilty look crossed your face, "Sinner." "Impure." "Disgusting."  The voices that had haunted you after your trauma started to echo in your mind. Shameful, you look away from the holy boy.
                          
Asahi notices immediately, "Hey, I'm sorry if I offended you or if I said something wrong."
                          
Waves of pain crash into you and you take a deep breath, breathing it out and away from you, "No Senpai...I was just contemplating my relationship with God if he exists. I guess."
                          
"I'm sure he loves you." He smiles brightly and a tear escapes your eye, you brush it away fast.
                          
You couldn't tell what compelled you to speak but you couldn't keep your thoughts inside. Asahi's gaze was steady and calming, coercing you to speak, "I don't know if he would love a sinner." your voice cracked. 
                          
Asahi started to panic internally and quickly sat next to you, "Hey, God forgives when you ask for forgiveness. You're a wonderful person and such an angel. I'm sure whatever you think you did wrong will be forgiven. You make up for it."
                          
You hide your face behind your hands at that, "The sins that were committed happened forcefully. Without my consent or thought. I cannot pay back what I am not to blame for. Yet I am no longer who I was before. Sin was forced upon me and I pay the price, even when it was never my fault. I don't blame God... or anyone."
                          
Asahi falls silent, understanding that something very wrong had happened to you. Suga and Daichi looked angry, but not at you. At whoever had hurt you. 
                          
Asahi put his arm around your shoulder and held you for a bit as he waited for you to relax, when you did he pulls out his crucifix necklace and takes it off, "May I?" He asks, motioning to your hand.
                          
You place your smaller hand into his large warm palm. He places the necklace over the top of your hand, "Does that hurt?" 
                          
You shake your head.
                          
"Well then. You are not condemned." He smiles at you. 
                          
You look at him in awe. And he lets go of your hand once more, "May I?' he motions to your neck this time, and you nod.
                          
He points to a mirror in front of you both and you watch, enchanted as he clasped it on softly, "I don't know what your spiritual beliefs are...but how do you feel now?" 
                          
You feel 3 kind and loving gazes on you, "Cared for." 
                          
Suga nods, "You are. We are family here. You're safe now. And what happened here will be kept confidential. Don't worry about anything now. Even if it has been a short time...there is something about you that just feels very familiar. So now that you're a fellow crow. You will be cherished here."
                          
Daichi nods and sits next to you on your other side, "We're here now." Suga then moves in front of you and holds your hands, "You'll be okay. I swear we'll do our best."
                          
You couldn't stop your tears after that and welcomed their warm embraces, never stiffening. Staying in the group hug till your tears dried.
                          
When you pulled away, everyone was smiling. With a sigh you got up to freshen up, you handed Asahi his necklace back which he accepted reluctantly, telling you he would get you a new one soon.
                          
As you exited the room you noticed Tsukishima lingering outside. You avoided his gaze but he followed you silently, "How much did you hear?" Your voice was shaky. 
                          
"What are you talking about, shortie. I was just waiting for you to stop being lazy so we could all get back to practice." His words were a bit rude but his tone was gentle.
                          
Deciding not to ask about it you quickly used the restroom to wash up and washed your face. 
                          
For the rest of practice, you stayed by Yachi who was going on and on about her date with Yamaguchi. You felt so happy for her. Before you knew it, it was time to go home. Incredibly, there was no awkward air or bad aura in the gym, even when you bid your goodbyes to your seniors they just patted your head affectionately which made you blush a deep red. 
                          
The walk back home with Tsukishima was silent and a bit tense. He couldn't stand it. So when you reached home he pulled you over to his house wordlessly, "It's my day and you're sticking with me." he muttered as he pulled you to his door.
                          
You let him and took off your shoes before you entered his house, no one was home. Yet you weren't uncomfortable. Tsuki walked to his bedroom and you followed him, "We're watching Movies. That's what I usually do now." 
                          
You sigh, "Alright, but how about I sneak into my place through the window to get changed then come back, I left the window unlocked."
                          
He opens his window, "Be my guest. Make sure not to faceplant on the ground. The hospital is far away from here" his comment didn't bother you and you quickly did as you said
                          
When you were back, you were wearing a new comfortable tracksuit and sat next to Tsukishima on his bed, where he held his laptop, ready to play the movie.
                          
"Jurrasic Park....please don't tell me we're watching all of them."
                          
Tsuki just smirked, "how did you know."
                          
"I just had a feeling. I showed the movie to my brother and he makes me watch all of them with him again and again whenever he gets the chance. I guess you have a thing for dinos too." You motion to his plushies.
                          
"Shut it." He mumbles and starts the 1st movie. 
                          
You relax and watch the movie in front of you, your body melting on its own after a while.
                          
Over time, you end up resting a bit of your weight on him and he shifts to accommodate you, not minding it at all. It wasn't long before you feel your eyes start to close.
                          
Why am I so comfortable?  Was your last thought before you drifted away.