Aran x Kita / Arankita

                                    

                                          
(A/N - this is for -evphoricb6mbi!)
                          
Unicorn-Flowers: 👋 Aran 👁 a🚪👉
                          
Kita: Waving hand Aran brown eye a entryway pointer finger. I don't understand. It should be *an because the next word starts with a vowel-
                          
Atsumu: hi Aran i adore ya. 
                          
Kita: Oh... I...see. That makes much more sense. 
                          
Yachi: both of you are such treasures i want to cry T^T
                          
Aran: Aww don't cry! I ain't half as precious in comparison ta you.
                          
Yachi: I-
                          
Yachi: pROTECT HIM.
                          
Osamu: protect Aran? that's a funny joke. 
                          
Atsumu: yah, normally i'm with ya Yacchan but when we were bein' annoyin' in middle school, Aran used ta just pick us up an' carry us around like lapdogs.
                          
Osamu: fuckin' humiliatin'.
                          
Atsumu: said it "built character".
                          
Aran: It was really just ta get ya guys ta shut the fuck up. 
                          
Hinata: oHhHhh Tsumu-San do you think Meian could do that to you and it would work??
                          
Atsumu: well let's not fuckin' find out??
                          
Unicorn-Flowers: oh my GOD I FUcking love Arankita T^T 
                          
Shirabu: BIASED
                          
Unicorn-Flowers: i'm never going to not be biased toward smth. 
                          
Shirabu: then maybe you should recuse yourself like a biased judge. make sure the ratings are fair.
                          
Unicorn-Flowers: but i'm not rating the ships ?
                          
Shirabu: well- fucken- *hiss*
                          
Unicorn-Flowers: okay okay! fine, i'll sit out for a few chapters, how about that? let you handle things on your own? 
                          
Kuroo: No don't-
                          
Unicorn-Flowers: goodbye luvs!
                          
Kuroo: Shirabu what the Fuck have you done. 
                          
Osamu: since no one can stop me i'mma just say this now, while i have complete respect fer both y'an Aran, Kita ya gotta marry my brother so he doesn't end up dead in a ditch somewhere, yer his only hope-
                          
Hinata: EXCUSE ME I AM A PERFECTLY VIABLE OPTION
                          
Osamu: yer a human disaster is what y'are. 
                          
Hinata: * scandalized gasp*
                          
Oikawa: whaT ABOUT ME WE'RE LEGALLY MARRIED IN ONE PLACE WE'RE NEVER GOING TO VISIT AGAIN. 
                          
Osamu: i'm not even gonna explain why yer not a good choice fer my brother-
                          
Iwa: good call. Shittykawa doesn't know how to do his own taxes. 
                          
Oikawa: oKAY I'm ending these rumors right here and now. Do I know how to do taxes? No. But that's not the true mark of a person-
                          
Iwa: it's the true mark of a tax evader. 
                          
Osamu: MY BROTHER IS NOT MARRYIN' A TAX EVADER. 
                          
Atsumu: did anyone consider askin' me who I wanna marry? 
                          
Sakusa: lol no. 
                          
Atsumu: ō-ō
                          
Suna: you guys really need to get back on track. you're like, not even on a track anymore. you're in the surrounding forests. 
                          
Kita: what about who i wanna marry ?
                          
Tsukki: obviously no one cares about that. 
                          
Kita: i care. 
                          
Aran: I care-
                          
Yachi: wait because you like him? 
                          
Aran: eUm-
                          
Akane: Arankita would make perfect dads. 
                          
Alisa: omg you're right they would- 
                          
Aran: Kita is a close friend-
                          
Atsumu: lol that's pretty gay. 
                          
Sakusa: everything is pretty gay if you frame it in a romantic light- 
                          
Kuroo: or in other words, the inverse of 'no homo'? 
                          
Sakusa: I don't know who you are, but yes, that. 
                          
Aran: Okay but I think y'all are missin' the point-
                          
Noya: *slams down gavel* I RULE ARANKITA CANON. 
                          
Osamu: YA CAN'T DO THAT THAT AIN'T HOW THIS WORKS-
                          
Noya: IT'S MY SHOW NOW BITCH I'M THE ONE WITH THE POWDERED WIG. 
                          
Tsukki: judge Yuu-dy.
                          
Osamu: PLEASE THAT'S FROM THE FUCKin' DOLLAR STORE.
                          
Tsukki: why is no one laughing at my perfect pun. 
                          
Noya:  YEAH AND I ONLY PAID A 100 YEN FOR IT SO I'M STILL THE WINNER HERE. 
                          
Atsumu: GIVE IT THE FUCK UP SAMU YER THE ONLY ONE THAT DOESN'T LIKE ARANKITA.
                          
Bokuto: i'm actually in favor of atsukita but-
                          
Tsukki: lmao no one asked you-
                          
Akane: UHGGH THE BOKUTSUKI INTERACTIONS PLEASE-
                          
Kuroo: can we please not go down this road-
                          
Oikawa: Someone sounds a little Jelly.
                          
Kenma: he's not jealous.
                          
Yachi: SOMEONE SOUNDS A LITTLE JELLY. 
                          
Kuroo: oh god oh god oh god, someone bring Author-Chan back-
                          
Tsukki: lmao bitch she gone.
                          
Kuroo: SHIRABU YOU FUCKER. SOMEONE FIND HER. 
                          
Tsukki: and burn her at the stick. 
                          
Tsukki: *steak. fuck.
                          
Tanaka: LMFAO BURN HER AT THE STICK-
                          
Atsumu: y'all we at 666 words i'd just like ta inform-
                          
Sakusa: while now we're not.
                          
Atsumu: Omi let me have this one thing-
                          
Yachi: AUTHOR-CHAN ISN'T A WITCH, SHE'S A GODDESS
                          
Tsukki: She's a demon, dear. 
                          
Kita: i really think Author-Chan is just a human-
                          
Akaashi: this is a mess. 
                          
Akane: LET'S DO RATINGS. 
                          
Kuroo: Yes. Please. Please let's have some semblance of order-
                          
Atsumu: 10/10 they're perfect. flawless. 
                          
Kita: I think Aran would be a suitable an' responsible husband so 7/10. 
                          
Osamu: Kita-San, please keep an open mind. I know Tsumu is horrible but at least he's hot-
                          
Atsumu: wait- ya just called me hot? 
                          
Osamu: we share the same face, 'course i did. Kita-San, i beg'a ya. yer the only chance he's got-
                          
Atsumu: Excuse ya, i could have anyone I wanted.
                          
Yachi: he's right, have you seen him? 
                          
Kuroo: Osamu, can you please just give a rating so we can go?
                          
Osamu: I love ya Kita an' I love ya Aran, but 1/10. My brother comes first-
                          
Atsumu: oh god. oh god i really hatecha. 
                          
Osmau: oh. woe is me. 0-o
                          
Kuroo: RIGHT. so let's move on now?