Chapter 25

                                    

                                          
'It's sex on fire'
                          
~Sex on fire~Kings of Leon 
                          


                          
Thea Hayden 
                          
We got back to the loft and Harry immediately put on some music because he knows it calms my nerves. We both thew our coats on the kitchen counter and sat down on the couch without saying anything because we didn't have to, he knew that I just needed him beside me .I know that he thinks I'm going to go back to my catatonic state but I won't , I hate being trapped inside my mind. Whenever something happens in my life that can alter it my brain goes on some kind of overload, it's happened ever since I was a kid. It's like my emotions are too much and everything just shuts down and I can't feel anything but pain. Mental health is something that I've always struggled with , I only come to terms with my anxiety not that long ago and I take medication for it but I know that I've had depression for a while I just don't want to accept the fact that I'm damaged . That I'm one of the unlucky ones that got cursed with a fucked up mind. I want to pretend for at least a day that I'm normal , I want to be normal if not for myself than for Harry. Harry deserves normal, he deserves a girl that doesn't have an abusive father, a psycho ex, an aunt with cancer , that's practically a mother to her siblings, that's a whore that got herself pregnant . He doesn't deserve a girl where her mind is scarier than a fucking world war. 
                          
I hadn't even realized that I was crying until I felt Harry's hand brushing up against my cheek , "Baby, c'mere" Harry tugs my arm and makes me straddle his lap as he starts to stroke my spine slowly. "I-I'm sorry" I apologize whole heartedly . "Why are you apologizing ?" he laughs and rests his hands on my hips as I hug his neck even tighter. "Y-you deserve so m-much b-better." I stutter and choke on my sobs. Harry forces my arms off his neck and puts them on his lap he looks at me like I grew three heads. "Princess, what is that supposed to mean?" he grabs my hands and holds onto them tight and I shift a little bit on his lap. " You should be with s-someone that's normal and makes you h-happy and doesn't have a fucked up m-mind and has-s a normal family." I confess and continue looking at my hands that are holding his as tears are streaming down my face and staining my shirt. "Thea, I don't want to be with anyone else especially if that someone is normal because normal is boring. For the record , no ones family is normal, including mine ."
                          
I continue crying and choking on my tears as he cups my cheeks,"But, Harry... I'm so fucked up you have no idea." he smiles and kisses my tears away. "Princess, I'm fucked up too. So, why don't we be total fuck ups together ?" as soon as he says that and knots form in my stomach and I am left with no choice but to kiss him. We both gasp into the kiss and he grabs my neck as I grab loose strands of his hair at the nape of his neck because his hair is in a bun at the top of his head. I start roll my hips against his center and we both let out a moan . "Thea." Harry lets out a breath and I break the kiss and look at him. "I want to." I confess, "You want to ?" he asks . I nod in response but he doesn't take that as an answer,"Words my love." He kisses my lips softly then use my words as he suggested , "I want to fuck you, Harry."Harry shifts under my and I can feel him getting harder by the second."As you wish, Princess"
                          
I resume grinding my hips against him and smashed our lips together and that riles him up and he takes me by the hips and digs his thumbs into them. He stands up abruptly and I wrap my legs around his waist as he takes us to the kitchen and he places me on the counter. He breaks our contact for a moment to catch our breath and I hate that I'm not touching him , I grab his neck and start kissing him again...hard. I wrap my legs tightly around his waist, he brings his hands down to the small of my back and I arch it in the process.  We continue kissing aggressively and moaning into each others mouths and smiling against each other . Harry starts to take off his shirt and I start to undo his belt and I drop it on the floor. He takes off my shirt in one swift motion and right after he unclasps my bra and throws it across the counter .