Just realized that the reason I love making friends on tumblr is because it’s exactly how you make friends on the playground as a six year old. No, I don’t know their name but they love mermaids too and built this awesome sand castle. No, I don’t know their age but their imaginary cheetah is friends with mine. You like this show? You like this character?? You can sing the theme song really loud??? Here is a flower crown. Here is a juice box. You can share my time and I might never see you again but part of you stays in my soul forever. In my mind we’re still on the swing set and the sky is blue and nothing will ever be wrong again.

i am a mollusc, you are an irritant, and i am actively coating you with successive depositions of nacreous material which will eventually render you beautiful, silent, smooth, and quite dead

thanks

you’re welcome :) now silence

.

But it's no longer you…

（drew this months ago forgot to post it）

Byzantine column from Hagia Sophia (Istanbul, Turkey)

It took Oscar Wilde like 65K words to say this exact thing.

girls are asking me to "touch the demon inside of them." chill I haven't even had breakfast yet

girls are asking me to "touch the brea st

Unsentence mix my post at once foul harlot.

se x my fo ot.

I saw this sassy little Hermes on a 5th century BCE kylix and had to draw him. The original piece, titled “The Embassy to Achilles” by the Tarquinia painter, can be found in its entirety can be found in the collection of the Louvre, G264.

this is from the 2000’s btw

Looks like @staff mistakenly censored this comic, which is an ironic and very funny thing to happen

Here it is again. You might want to save it just in case an accident like that happens again

EDIT: HMM. LOOKS LIKE OP WAS BANNED TOO. WHAT A FUNNY. IRONIC. ACCIDENT

ok but give me one good reason why you wouldn’t date Kermit the frog besides that he is a puppet and a frog

“miss piggy would make it look like an accident”

Fellas is it gay to perceive oneself?

Sounds pretty gay to me

ID: A youtube comment with 11 likes by Niceone, it says "I've lived 46 years without knowing this. How nice of life to save some of the best bites for later." End ID.

Normally, people tend to get frustrated, even jokingly, if they miss out on something. This comment was on a song from 1974 and it made me smile quite much. Simply appreciative. Like a dessert after dinner.

It is genuinely mind blowing to me just how many Tumblr posts have changed my life for the better and taught me to be happier. Not all of the thoughts originate on Tumblr, but the way people collect and frame them has literally changed my brain chemistry.

"a vague disclaimer is nobody's friend"

Y'all this is a piece of history right here. Every single time you see a reference to a "shovel talk" in fic, defined here as "someone threatening harm to a potential romantic partner of a friend/loved one," it's referencing this scene. This scene specifically. Everywhere else that is not fannish internet, that interaction is referred to a "shotgun talk," referencing the father threatening a daughter's boyfriend with a shotgun. This scene gave a lot of people a chance to reframe that interaction in terms of a protective friend rather than a possessive father, which for a lot of obvious reasons resonated with people a whole fucking lot, and it immediately spread like wildfire into fannish and then general internet lexicon. I've seen people try and backronym it into an extension of the shotgun talk, as in, "I've got a shotgun and a shovel to bury you with," but I've asked a lot of rednecks from a lot of different necks of the woods and no one has ever encountered that variant in brickspace life. It's all Buffy, babey. This shit is linguistic history in the making.

this website’s easy watch. *dangles a bunch of greek gods like keys*

i know what i’m doing dw

Keep in mind I only know like. Two Greek gods by name. Homer is one of them, and he was good friends with Odysseus I think?

Wait fuck Homer isn’t a god he wrote the fucking thing. Fuck

POST CANCELLED NO ONE LOOK

desperately google searching for “greek gods to pray to when people notice your online idiocy”

You're failing.

You don’t think I know that, God of Death? Can I pray to you so I can DIE ALREADY

Pluto is Roman, not Greek

?????

Short version is that Pluto is a later name for the god of death, which is often associated with the Roman era/Roman mythology. Hades is the earlier name.

I set up my own house made of sticks and it has promptly fallen on me

HE’S NOT EVEN REAL?????*

I made this post thinking I knew what kind of fire I was playing with. Hephaestus, God of Fire, looking upon me from his fuck off tower or whatever said “Oh you think you know? Check this shit” and promptly set my post ablaze for everyone to observe

Hephaestus doesn't have a tower, he lived in a volcano

FINE THEN. BIG FUCK OFF VOLCANO. WHATEVER

Achievement Unlocked:

Lightning Bait

You're basically doing the post equivalent of standing out in a field during a storm with a ten-foot copper pole, you better hope Zeus is busy hiding from Hera.

I need you to name every greek God you know and what they are for plz

For science

OKAY FINE HERE'S WHAT I'VE FOUND

ares is the god of war, not kratos

WHY THE FUCK DOES THE GAME CALL HIM GOD OF WAR THEN

I can't believe this post is less than 24 hours old, it feels like something out of classic tumblr lore

Can't wait for them to find out there's actuallt two war deities. Gotta go find popcorn.

there's TWO???? WHAT DO YOU NEED TWO WAR DEITIES? SO THEY CAN FIGHT THE WARS FASTER?????

The sea foam formed from the severed testicles of Uranus/Ouranos, divine personification of the sky, after they were cut off and cast into the sea by his son, Cronus/Kronos.

oh ok

this website’s easy watch. *dangles a bunch of greek gods like keys*

i know what i’m doing dw

Keep in mind I only know like. Two Greek gods by name. Homer is one of them, and he was good friends with Odysseus I think?

Wait fuck Homer isn’t a god he wrote the fucking thing. Fuck

POST CANCELLED NO ONE LOOK

desperately google searching for “greek gods to pray to when people notice your online idiocy”

You're failing.

You don’t think I know that, God of Death? Can I pray to you so I can DIE ALREADY

Pluto is Roman, not Greek

?????

Short version is that Pluto is a later name for the god of death, which is often associated with the Roman era/Roman mythology. Hades is the earlier name.

I set up my own house made of sticks and it has promptly fallen on me

HE’S NOT EVEN REAL?????*

I made this post thinking I knew what kind of fire I was playing with. Hephaestus, God of Fire, looking upon me from his fuck off tower or whatever said “Oh you think you know? Check this shit” and promptly set my post ablaze for everyone to observe

Hephaestus doesn't have a tower, he lived in a volcano

FINE THEN. BIG FUCK OFF VOLCANO. WHATEVER

Achievement Unlocked:

Lightning Bait

You're basically doing the post equivalent of standing out in a field during a storm with a ten-foot copper pole, you better hope Zeus is busy hiding from Hera.

I need you to name every greek God you know and what they are for plz

For science

OKAY FINE HERE'S WHAT I'VE FOUND

ares is the god of war, not kratos

WHY THE FUCK DOES THE GAME CALL HIM GOD OF WAR THEN

FOR THE RECORD this whole thing wasn’t bait. I tend to not look where I leap when I get cocky, and sincerely forgot in the moment that Homer was the guy that wrote the Odyssey and NOT a god.

It was genuine panic I felt when I realised what kind of hole I was in.

this website’s easy watch. *dangles a bunch of greek gods like keys*

i know what i’m doing dw

Keep in mind I only know like. Two Greek gods by name. Homer is one of them, and he was good friends with Odysseus I think?

Wait fuck Homer isn’t a god he wrote the fucking thing. Fuck

POST CANCELLED NO ONE LOOK

desperately google searching for “greek gods to pray to when people notice your online idiocy”

You're failing.

You don’t think I know that, God of Death? Can I pray to you so I can DIE ALREADY

Pluto is Roman, not Greek

?????

Short version is that Pluto is a later name for the god of death, which is often associated with the Roman era/Roman mythology. Hades is the earlier name.

I set up my own house made of sticks and it has promptly fallen on me

HE’S NOT EVEN REAL?????*

I made this post thinking I knew what kind of fire I was playing with. Hephaestus, God of Fire, looking upon me from his fuck off tower or whatever said “Oh you think you know? Check this shit” and promptly set my post ablaze for everyone to observe

Hephaestus doesn't have a tower, he lived in a volcano

FINE THEN. BIG FUCK OFF VOLCANO. WHATEVER

Achievement Unlocked:

Lightning Bait

You're basically doing the post equivalent of standing out in a field during a storm with a ten-foot copper pole, you better hope Zeus is busy hiding from Hera.

I need you to name every greek God you know and what they are for plz

For science

OKAY FINE HERE'S WHAT I'VE FOUND

ares is the god of war, not kratos

WHY THE FUCK DOES THE GAME CALL HIM GOD OF WAR THEN

I can't believe this post is less than 24 hours old, it feels like something out of classic tumblr lore

ok, the op of this may be trolling us, but let's imagine for a moment how WONDERFUL it would be to not be a child anymore and discovering the entirety of greek mythology. Like, I'm from the side that were fed greek mythology since we were still in our mother bellies, and I just accepted every single bullshit from the mythology even what's deemed like a fever dream very quickly, zero questioning.

Like, Zeus married his sister? Seems legit. He swallowed his first wife ? Well it was a contingency plan so ok. Dionysus died once ? Well, he got better so, who cares ?

I have seen some people saying they would pay for re-reading their favourite saga for the first time, maybe I would pay for rediscovering greek mythology for the first time with adult eyes.

So, OP, if you really just started learning about this mythology, good for you, you're gonna have do much fun !

ZEUS VORED HIS WIFE???????

Rule of thumb for Greek Mythology: if you think „no way anyone ever wrote about that in mythology“ the Greeks did it.

Cannibalism, eternal loop of torture, incest (even human on human incest), bestiality, trans people, gay people, bi people, intersex people. The Greeks have it all.

Also Greek God Heaven is called Olympus and is on a mountain top. Greek God Heaven is a fitting name though.