superglue hate blog

This screenshot from a gardening Facebook group has been on my phone for several years and I'm not sure I'm ever going to be able to delete it. Apparently it comes from a British gardening book from the 80s. I know we all joke that the English are afraid of flavor, but I assure you, you are not prepared for this.

That last paragraph HAUNTS me. How am I supposed to sleep at night picturing Paul Hollywood — sobbing, hands trembling — alone in his kitchen, gingerly rubbing the edges of a salad bowl with a single clove of unskinned garlic, wondering if he will ever be brave enough to do the same to a roast chicken?

No wonder Dracula wanted to come to England

isnt there a better picture they could have used

No this was the best picture of Ed Sheeran they had

On my first day in Germany I got to my hotel and I couldn't get the lights to turn on. And I was like "Eh, fuck it, I'll just take a shower in the dark." And then the shower wouldn't get hot. I waited and waited and it stayed ice cold.

So I go down to the front desk and I'm like "My lights won't turn on and my shower won't get hot" so they send this guy up with me. We get into the room and I flick the switch and nothing happens so I'm like "See?"

And he goes "You must put your card in the slot."

"I... what? I have to put my room card in the light switch?"

"Of course!"

Now I have been in many hotels in the US and never encountered this concept, but apparently it was something most of their guests already knew. So I'm looking like a fool at this point. I feel like an idiot. The dude is fully grinning at me. I put the card in the slot and voila, the light turns on.

Then he's like "Ok, let's see if the shower works. You know you must wait for the hot water?" and I just know he's thinking I'm an idiot who also can't use a shower. This stupid American can't wait for the hot water! She can't even use a light switch or a shower!

And I guess he was distracted by these thoughts of my stupidity, because this dude fully stepped into the shower. In his nice dress shirt and slacks. He just. Gets into the shower.

And turns it on.

Have you ever seen a playing field get leveled instantaneously

if you don’t remember anything else for the next 4 years, remember this: don’t be a fucking snitch.

One of the many ways I keep myself honest as a poster is that I don't have a folder of reaction images to lazily use at the expense of writing out original text.

hey don't cry. 7,401 species of frog in the world, ok?

IMPORTANT UPDATE: 7,532 species of frog in the world, ok?!

great news! 7,556 species of frog in the world, ok?!

hey don't cry, now there are 7,576 species of frog in the world, ok?!

excellent news! 7,591 species of frog in the world, peace and love on planet earth

guess what! 7,624 species of frog on planet earth, ok?

hey don't cry, 7,645 species of frog on planet earth, ok? peace and love on planet autism

great news! 7,653 species of frog on planet earth, ok?

hey don't cry. 7,670 species of frog on planet earth, ok?

new year new frogs! 7,678 species of frog on planet earth, ok?

hey don't cry. 7,683 species of frog in the world, ok? ❤️

hey don't cry. 7,698 species of frog in the world, peace and love on planet earth

hey don’t cry. 7,701 species of frog in the world, ok?

@markscherz how many of these do we get to thank you for again?

95 at present, more on the way :)

hey don't cry. 95 species of frog discovered by tumblr's own frog scientist dr. mark scherz, ok?

hey don't cry. 7,758 species of frog in the world, yippee!

hey don't cry. 7,806 species of frog in the world, ok?

Yeah sometimes the people casually admitting to murder are little old ladies who did something to survive in like the 50s. Sometimes you've spend a couple of hours around a former US marine and he casually jokes to his buddies about the time he pushed a local man off a balcony during an argument at a nightclub while stationed in southeast asia and left before anybody could stop him, and you realise the devil might be a little bit real.

oh okay

We need to bring back the bait fish because sometimes it feels like yall can't tell when someone is trolling you

Look at him! He's so cute and he knows that someone posting stupid, brain dead or offensive comments is just trying to get you mad, and you should make fun of them for that.

We as a website need him back in our lives

The Fourteenth Prince is Sick of Heaven’s Will now up on ao3!! more chapters will be posted as i write them. fun cover image yippee

ch2 is up!

Idk where people get the idea that muppet movies have only one human in the cast. Both John Silver and Jim are human in Muppet Treasure Island, along with a handful of supporting cast. In A Christmas Carol, Scrooge, his nephew, his former fiancée, and a good portion of the extras in their social circles were all human.

The ratio of human to muppet is determined by how far you can push the story into comedy without losing its heart. The fine line between genius and parody.

The emotional heart of Muppet Treasure Island, for example, is the parental relationship between Jim and Silver. The Muppet troupe's Old Broadway musical numbers and patchy respect for the fourth wall is offset by Jim coming to terms with the fact that the adult he chose to trust was willing to hurt him. Not out of malice, but because he had priorities other than Jim. Lose either one of those components, and you lose what makes a Muppet movie a Muppet movie.

A Christmas Carol would still have been hilarious if it were all felt puppets calling Scrooge a bitch, but what makes it an enduring classic is how Scrooge comes to mourn his loss of human connection, represented by his (human) fiancée, and then regains it by connecting with his (human) nephew.