Failing Forward

Many people try to avoid failure - I, myself, am guilty of this. I think it is important however to understand failure as a perception that we make when our objectives aren’t met. Failure can be seen as that condescending monster that halts our progress in life, but it should be accepted as an ultimatum that is required throughout the process of success.  

The year 2015 has been a year of adventure, distress and chaos, and definitive growth and development for many. I can happily say that I have experienced all of the above and it has made me a better person because of it. Why? Well, because my perception of failure has changed completely. I learnt that it is about being aware of your disappointments, but not about dwelling in this mindful state of awareness for too long. Failure cannot be avoided, failure is subjective, but failure is a simple price to pay to achieve success – it is failing forward that matters most.

Throughout this year, I have had the privilege of meeting some amazing leaders and have been guided by remarkable mentors. The common theme of ‘failing forward’ seemed to arise quite often. It's a theme that was intriguing to me because it was something that seemed to impact our entire lives and affect our relationships with others. So, it was important for me to get a better understanding of failure, not just as a single event, but as a process of its own, and to understand how important it is to change one's mindset into perceiving these misfortunes into stepping stones for success.

Throughout this journey of trying to understand the concept of failing forward, and equipping myself with the necessary resilience needed to put this ‘theory into practice’, there were three main aspects that I learnt that will hopefully guide me, and others, as we enter into a brand new year, with brand new challenges.

1. Be constantly, but cautiously curious

“Never let the fear of striking out keep you from playing the game.” –Babe Ruth

Don’t be afraid to seek more than you ever thought possible. Taking risks is vital when it comes to failing forward. It is about keeping your focus on your sphere of interest, but always being ready for any unintended mishaps that could occur. By anticipating unintended consequences, you are preparing yourself for that bounce-back when things go wrong. Be clear about what you want and creative about how you are going to get it.

2. Accept responsibility

“Be the director of your own life” – Gil Oved

No matter where you are right now, or where you have been, it is important that you rise up from any unfortunate circumstances that you have been confronted with, and you keep walking with your head held high. It is not about not failing, it is about taking responsibility for what has happened and choosing to become resilient towards it. We are all worthy of respect, but before we can start taking responsibility for the collective, we need to take responsibility of the self.

3. Get over yourself and start giving to others

“As we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give others permission to do the same.” – Nelson Mandela

Failure is like a bully, it tries to sabotage the mind into believing that nothing good will come of it, and no one will ever be able to help you through it. But it is important that we do not become self-absorbed in our own pity to such an extent that we forget about the support we have around us. When times get tough and perceptions become dubious, it is important that we remember that sometimes people believe in us more than we believe in ourselves. Take feedback seriously, but not personally. When you develop a giving and open spirit, your feelings of being insufficient will disappear – after all, anybody has the ability to make a difference in someone else’s life. 

So, as we lead into a New Year and close a chapter in the old one, I hope that we can all learn from our mistakes, and prosper elegantly into the unknown as we aspire for success. Let these failures be the fuel that is required to ignite  new opportunities within us. The glory comes in rising again - learn to fail forward. “You fall, you rise, you make mistakes, you live, you learn. You’re human, not perfect. You’ve been hurt, but you’re alive. Think of what a precious privilege it is to be alive – to breathe, to think, to enjoy, and to chase the things you love. Sometimes there is sadness in our journey, but there is also lots of beauty. We must keep putting one foot in front of the other even when we hurt, for we will never know what is waiting for us just around the bend.”