In Exodus 13:21–22, the Lord went before the Israelites to guide their steps. Though I (Jessika) couldn’t see it then, I’m convinced the Lord went before me during my final pregnancy. When intrusive thoughts simmered in my second trimester, I did my best to counter lies with biblical truth. But when worry and fear came to a rolling boil, I brought my concerns to the Lord. What was going on spiritually that I couldn’t see? How was I to pray? I lacked clarity and felt confused. Was it the labor and delivery I was to pray over? Was it for my child? I didn’t know what lay ahead, but I trusted that God did. On my living room sofa, the Lord guided me to circle particular Psalms and commit to praying them. For one month, I faithfully prayed those circled prayers and for my fear and anxiety to break. But when my son was born in our home at 42 weeks, weighing only 4 pounds, 14 ounces, I realized it wasn’t over; it was just beginning. At 36 hours old, Ezra seized in my arms—a strange twitching was followed by an odd stillness and my son’s glossy, vacant stare. Something was wrong, and I had to act immediately. My husband rushed to my side, snapping his fingers and clapping his hands, hoping our son would “snap” out of it. Feeling helpless, I began to sob. I called 911, but in the shock and trauma of our circumstances, I couldn’t even remember our address. I was paralyzed with fear.
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Will Writer and Estate Practitioner at AHJ Wills and Estates & Business Support Manager at True Potential LLP
Did you know that marriage revokes a will? This, combined with the seemingly lack of mental capacity checks when getting married, makes it an easy target for exploitation. I recently had the opportunity to listen to Daphne Franks share her harrowing experience with her mother, Joan Blass, and the issue of predatory marriage. Her mother, diagnosed with vascular dementia five years prior, was allowed to marry someone who took advantage of her at 92. It is truly terrifying how vulnerable individuals can be exploited. #predatorymarriage #vulnerable #mentalcapacity #AdvocateForChange #FamilyLaw Please read her story here:
Our Story
https://www.predatorymarriage.uk
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I've been admittedly absent, but that doesn't mean the work to support military spouses going through transition stops! Today's weekly wrap-up is all about a new friend and an existing program that I think feels like a well-kept secret for retired and retiring families. Plus articles linked in the comments that published in Stars and Stripes and Military Spot! Rev. Joseph Calandra, Jr., BCC introduced me to the VA Chaplaincy programs that I didn't even know existed. Did you? Check out the Warrior to Soul Mate program which is designed to strengthen relationships between the servicemember and their spouse. Veteran families are 60% more likely to divorce. This program dramatically drops that percentage for participants. If we're being honest, relationship struggles happen even more during high-stress times like transition. We're already stressed out. We aren't communicating well. Depression may have hit. Overly busy days and disconnected partners. P.S. This is not a religion-focused program despite it coming through the VA Chaplain's office. I'll link the first section of the workbook below so you can see that this is a psychoeducational learning opportunity and teaches you to communicate and make better decisions as a couple. There is always an opportunity to include spiritual health with mental wellness and strengthening the family bonds. What I love about the VA Chaplain's office is that they are willing to support you where you are in that journey. P.S.S. As always - subscribe to my weekly newsletter and find the resources, tips, and tricks to Transition Like a Boss! https://lnkd.in/g6e75Xh8
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Relationship Strategist and Speaker helping you create GREATness in your relationships @home @school @work
*** BSF Principle 2/7: AFFECTION: *** Through the Building Strong Families Masterclass and Workbook, you will gain access to hundreds of tips, mindsets, ideas, and strategies that will guide you in applying the 7 Principles to strengthen your parenting and partnering skills, empowering you to create a strong and harmonious family environment. • Learn more and enroll here: RelateGREAT.net/StrongFam (or LinkTree in bio). #family #familylife #parenting #parentingtips #marriage #marriageadvice #relationshipgoals #couplegoals
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"One recommendation that stepparents hear frequently is "don't overstep your bounds," or "stay in your lane." It's an important principle to remember, but it can be frustrating because it's rarely clear where your lane is. So how do we as Plan B parents figure out where our lane is at any given time? This week, let's discuss some principles for figuring out where we fit into our unusual and challenging families. 1. Court Orders and Case Plans. The first and most obvious set of boundaries is whatever custody orders and case plans are in place. These documents, no matter how much we dislike them, set the outer boundaries of the decisions we can make. 2. We Are Not the People Who Are Supposed to Be In Our Kids' Lives. One unalterable fact is that, from our kids' perspectives, we are not the people who are supposed to be there. This fact will set many of our lane boundaries for us. No matter how wonderful we are, we cannot replace our kids' biological parent. Knowing that we are Plan B parents does not mean that we are second-best. We can still have an important impact on our kids by loving them and taking a step back in favor of their biological parents. 3. Let Your Spouse Take Point with His/Her Biological Kids. Supporting our spouses can be difficult when we think they are wrong. But, aside from safety concerns, it's not our job to correct them. It's our job to help and support them. And, frankly, I've always found my husband to be more receptive to my ideas when he feels supported rather than criticized. My lane is to support the person who is the parent. 4. Take Your Time. It's very easy to jump into a new marriage or relationship with all four feet, trying enthusiastically to take care of your new family and solve all the problems. If you do that, however, you are almost certain to overstep your bounds. Your spouse and his/her kids already have an established way of doing things, and you need to take your time to figure out where you fit in that routine. 5. Make a One-Way Commitment to Your Family. The final principle is that we have to love our spouses and kids without limits and commit to their welfare. Those commitments need healthy boundaries, but they also need to be one-way. Good relationships grow out of their knowing that they are loved. Our commitment and love for our families has to set the foundation from which a relationship can grow. Conclusion It's easy for people to say to us that we should stay in our lanes. It's much harder to know where those lanes are. We can start by paying attention to the reality that we're not supposed to be there and that our primary role is to support our kids' biological parents. Then we need to take our time, give our kids space, and learn how to make one-way commitments to our families." Find the full post and others like it on my blog https://lnkd.in/gijht_4C and subscribe to stay updated on events and new content!
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In addition to pervasive sadness, feeling hopeless and disconnected from others, another sign of depression is distorted thinking. Examples include overgeneralizing – after one thing goes wrong, saying, “Things never go right for me;” exaggerated responsibility for others - “Why aren’t you happy? It must be because of something I did or didn’t do;” and negative labeling – “I didn’t get up in time to exercise today – I’m lazy and a failure.” Left unchallenged, these false negative messages to self only deepen the despair. Depression is not a lack of faith or a character flaw, but a serious illness which when left untreated can destroy a life, a marriage and a family. It is treatable and you can feel better. See your medical doctor first and remember that your pastor and Christian counselors like those at Lutheran Family Service who also share your faith can help. https://lnkd.in/gJUNRhFb #buildinghealthyfamilies
Lutheran Family Service | Adoption, Unplanned Pregnancy Support, and Mental Health and Marriage Counseling
https://lutheranfamilyservice.org
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Relationship Strategist and Speaker helping you create GREATness in your relationships @home @school @work
*** BSF Principle 6/7: TIME TOGETHER: *** Through the Building Strong Families Masterclass and Workbook, you will gain access to hundreds of tips, mindsets, ideas, and strategies that will guide you in applying the 7 Principles to strengthen your parenting and partnering skills, empowering you to create a strong and harmonious family environment. • Learn more and enroll here: RelateGREAT.net/StrongFam (or LinkTree in bio). #family #familylife #parenting #parentingtips #marriage #marriageadvice #relationshipgoals #couplegoals
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Relationship Strategist and Speaker helping you create GREATness in your relationships @home @school @work
*** BSF Principle 6/7: TIME TOGETHER: *** Through the Building Strong Families Masterclass and Workbook, you will gain access to hundreds of tips, mindsets, ideas, and strategies that will guide you in applying the 7 Principles to strengthen your parenting and partnering skills, empowering you to create a strong and harmonious family environment. • Learn more and enroll here: RelateGREAT.net/StrongFam (or LinkTree in bio). #family #familylife #parenting #parentingtips #marriage #marriageadvice #relationshipgoals #couplegoals
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Relationship Strategist and Speaker helping you create GREATness in your relationships @home @school @work
*** BSF Principle 3/7: COMMITMENT: *** Through the Building Strong Families Masterclass and Workbook, you will gain access to hundreds of tips, mindsets, ideas, and strategies that will guide you in applying the 7 Principles to strengthen your parenting and partnering skills, empowering you to create a strong and harmonious family environment. • Learn more and enroll here: RelateGREAT.net/StrongFam (or LinkTree in bio). #family #familylife #parenting #parentingtips #marriage #marriageadvice #relationshipgoals #couplegoals
