Aut Couture Blog - This Isn't Child's Play Anymore
Our next Aut Couture blog delves into a bit of personal history here!
Celebrating neurodiversity is at the heart of Aut Couture and this foundation is reflected in my brother and I uniting because of our different brains working for a common purpose; to connect people and make good quality work.
As mentioned on our website, he has been the filter to my unfiltered creative dregs and his influence, early guidance and support has been crucial to Aut Couture's ongoing mission to authentically represent ALL brains. However, things took a left turn when a friend made a flippant comment about realising not all of Aut Couture's inaugural designs were mine. This all prompted a conversation with my brother about how to progress.
The decision to handle Aut Couture alone. Let me explain my rationale.
When you grow up as I did, people taking pity on you and treating you overprotectively (when I needed to be but far beyond those necessary years too), anything you do becomes a fight against the ideas people have about your capacity. The father that spoke for me when I didn't have the confidence to speak for myself. The mum that would shelter me with love and compassion. The brother that wanted to be part of something with the reinvigorated adult version of myself. Well-meaning comments that have negative connotations. All of these interactions, moments in life, have shaped me as a human being and whilst at times I've felt insulted by how people see me (or how they don't see me), I am unlearning the way of my child mind, embracing the tenderness as my core, and letting go of the real and perceived expectations that others may always have of me.
I DO have a voice. I CAN do things for myself. I DO still need help in certain areas of life. All of that is okay.
But with what feels like a lifetime build up of emotion, 1 comment was enough for me to feel impostor syndrome and reassess how to move forward with Aut Couture. I still want my brother to be involved in the process, at appropriate times, but I get such creative fulfilment from designing pieces that I think not only look pretty but say something meaningful for the wider community. It is so much more than clothing. It is a passion project. An opportunity to create conversational bridges to the nuance of my autistic community. Aut Couture is a chance for me to stand up and be heard as an individual for one of the few times in my life that I've felt able to.
Poetry was the vehicle that took my potential skyward.
Aut Couture is my ejector seat button.
Freefalling into this independent venture of discovery, development and definition as the MAN I am now.
YOUR TURN!
Comment below if you relate to the infantilising experiences I have had, how you battle back against them and whether you ever have impostor syndrome such as I have!
Let me know and tag me so we can continue the conversation!
#AutCoutureBlogs Alison Prof. Dr Mary #neurodiversity #blogpost
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