Dealing with contentious tactics

- Not everyone you deal with will know how to ask diagnostic questions or how to brainstorm and engage in problem solving. In fact, your conversation partner may resort to contentious or competitive tactics in an attempt to hold their ground or keep as many pieces of the pie as possible. It's important for you to learn and recognize these tactics so you can either disengage or meet fire with fire or change the conversation altogether. So it's really an opportunity to demonstrate your leadership. There are many contentious tactics, but I want to focus on the five most common. The first is ingratiation. Now this is getting what we want through charm or flattery or just because we're so darn likable. It might sound like hey, you're so skilled and fast with spreadsheets, and I'd love your help setting one up for me. In truth, this is a very useful tactic, especially if it's used authentically. But turn on the charm a little…