Martha Denton

Honestly, a little bit of all the buckets of advice is right. But, real human connection comes from being authentic and personal. Why do you admire this person? What about you might be something that they find interesting? Such as: Did you write a paper that mentioned their research? Are you doing something that is adjacent to their work that you could talk engage them on? Have a conversation topic (or topics) that could go into an authentic exchange of ideas.

An executive coach can help both the employee and the leader in this situation. From an employee perspective, coaching can help them understand how their current career opportunity can further their own skills. It can also help them work through challenges that might be butting up against their value system. For leaders, coaching can help them see blindspots (especially if they're open to a 360 like Hogan). It can also help them address culture challenges that they haven't seen before. And, honestly, many leaders have imposter syndrome, which can hurt their ability to see their role clearly, which in turn hurts their ability to lead their team. Addressing their own growth and learning helps them help their team.

It's important for a facilitator to recognize when their participants are distracted and need a minute. It's so easy to just jam all the content in and keep going because you're anxious about getting all the content into the workshop. We are living in a day and age of adult ADHD, so adapt! I recently joined a remote training where there was a 10 minute break every 70-90 minutes. It was amazing as a participant because I knew I'd be able to address that pressing email or errand. I knew I'd get to stretch my legs. A fun energizer when folks return are always great - like Mentimeter polls for remote sessions or quick exercises in person, like building something quickly out of LEGO or challenging folks to get a piece of paper across a room.

At times when I'm talking to leaders who are having bouts of imposter syndrome (or whatever term they assign to it), I ask them about past successes. I also help them shift to thinking about how they'll approach something - getting them into solving the issues that they were hired to do. I help them see how they're excited about the challenge and how they're contributing. For some though, the imposter syndrome is coming from not feeling as secure in their relationship with the other leaders around them. That's always worth exploring to help them see how and why they are part of those leadership teams - and to also be reminded that no body is perfect.