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Most Disappointing Sequels of All Time
Movies I Refuse to Watch in Genres I Love
Reviews
Take Shelter (2011)
Fantastic performances, but that's about it
Fantastic performances from Jessica Chastain and Michael Shannon. My issue with independent films like this is the plots move excruciatingly slow. Almost the entire first hour is dedicated to him having different versions of the same dream, and by the halfway point we're still exactly in the same place where we started. More stuff happens in the second half, but most of it is just consequences of his actions and doesn't really drive the plot. To be fair, I'm not even sure this film has a traditional plot, because I can't really identify the inciting incident or the denouement, and I'm not sure how the climax served the purpose of either. When it was over, I didn't really feel like the end justified the means, and I can't say I'm glad I watched it. All I can say is, Michael Shannon and Jessica Chastain are fantastic actors.
Blue Beetle (2023)
Awful dialog full of bad exposition and a paper thin plot
The dialog in the very first scene was so bad that I couldn't help but laugh out loud. I hoped it would get better, but it didn't. Every line Susan Sarandon's character says is some of the worst written dialog, and not even her acting chops could salvage it. But it's not just her character, the entire movie is full of terrible exposition presented in what seems like the laziest manner possible.
The plot is paper thin, too. The only thing the main character wants is money to save his parent's home. Everything that happens to him is caused by happenstance, serendipity, or a ridiculously hard to believe contrivance. I was given no reason to root for any of these characters.
I did like how they tried to develop the family dynamic, and I was hoping I could rally around that, but even that was clunky, at best. I had the urge to walk out from the very opening scene, but I forced myself to stay for nearly an hour. Eventually, the urge became too strong and I could no longer overcome it, and left the theater about halfway through.
I'll give this a 3/10 because the actors were trying their best with what they were given, and it really showed in their performances. I especially enjoyed George Lopez's performance, but it wasn't enough to save this film. I also thought the CGI was pretty good (except for the shot looking up inside the Kord building, that shot looked rough).
The Little Mermaid (2023)
Unexpectedly Fantastic
This is the 1st live action Disney movie I liked, so going into it I totally expected Disney to screw this up. Imagine my surprise when I didn't just like it, I loved it!
First of all, I was disappointed when I heard Ariel wouldn't be a red head. She's such an iconic character I thought that might be a terrible decision, but Halle Bailey did a fantastic job and made me fall in love with Ariel all over again. Fleshing out Eric's character was enjoyable, and seeing him spend more time with Ariel, giving their relationship an opportunity to grow on screen, was also welcome. And I loved most of the new songs. Eric & Ariel's new songs fit in so well it was like they belonged all along.
It wasn't all an improvement, though, there's a few things I didn't like. First, Javier Bardem's performance as King Triton was emotionally subdued, which very likely could have been the fault of the director. Scuttle's hip-hop song did not fit with the rest of the movie and took me out of the moment. And the finale was robbed of much of its dramatic excitement because there's no wedding to stop. Eric and Vanessa are just hanging out on a balcony when they're assaulted by scuttle and max. It was a bit disappointing.
But overall, I'm so happy to be surprised that Disney got this one right. And I can't wait to go see it again.
Glass Onion (2022)
Started Bad but Greatly Improved
Man, the first 30 minutes of this movie were pretty bad. I thought the whole movie was gonna be a train wreck because it starts with clunky (at best) dialog, no conflict, and lots of bad exposition. Then, about a 1/3 of the way in when the actual plot finally gets started, it picks up and grabbed my attention. I got invested in a big way and it held me until the end.
Huge fan of the first movie. It's one of the few films I've rated 10/10. Thought this one was gonna drop the ball, but in the end it's a fairly solid 7.5 or even 8/10. I'll decide for sure on my next watch.
Glad we saw it in the theater. Thank you Netflix for making that possible.
Reacher (2022)
Surprisingly Great
I tried reading "The Killing Floor" but I'm not a fan of Child's prose and gave up on it. I did enjoy the movie with Tom Cruise but the sequel was a dud. With such mixed feelings about this franchise I wasn't sure what to expect from this, but it turned out to be a fantastic mini-series.
The casting was excellent and I enjoyed all the characters and their relationships and interactions. The dialogue was fine and action scenes done well. I was totally invested in the climax, even though it got a little cliché in a few places (e.g. The obligatory kick the gun away so we can have a fist fight).
I'm looking forward to season 2.
Shadow and Bone (2021)
Derivative, Tropey, and...Fantastic!
I was pleasantly surprised by how much I enjoyed this show. After watching the first 7 episodes I talked my teenage daughter into watching it and I started over from episode 1 with her. There's not many shows I can sit through twice, but this is one of them.
The characters are interesting and the acting is great. I especially enjoyed all the little things the actress who portrayed Alina did when she was not the focus of the scene (e.g. Someone else was talking). Her micro expressions really sold the scene. The gentleman who portrayed Alexander was equally fantastic. So were Kaz and Mal and so many others. They all really drew me into their characters and it was delightful to see the way they interacted.
The story was interesting, too. By the end of episode one I'm totally invested in what happens next, and the plot twist about half way through the season was an excellent example of great storytelling.
As much as I enjoyed, though, it does have its shortcomings that prevent it from reaching a perfect 10. For example, the heart-render/witch hunter dynamic had a couple of scenes that could have been done better. And donning a hat and coat will not keep the most wanted criminals disguised while sharing the same small boat with the general. But despite its shortcomings I really enjoyed it and can't wait for season 2.
The Dead Zone (1983)
Dialogue is Atrocious!
I'm not rating this because I noped out 10 mins in and it's not fair to rate a movie I haven't seen more of. The dialogue was so cringingly horrible, I had to shut it off. From the "I'm gonna marry you, you know" to the "Johnny don't leave me" as she bursts into the hospital room...ugh. So, so bad. I'm outta here!
Sputnik (2020)
Unbelievable
I don't believe for a minute that if there was an alien symbiote that they would allow doctors and psychiatrists and other people to be in contact with him under any circumstances. And then the ridiculousness of raising the glass and letting her go in in the room with the alien in a space suit, it was just too stupid to believe. It strained the limits of disbelief well beyond the breaking point and I turned it off half-way through.
Greenland (2020)
Better than a lot of disaster movies
Entertaining. I thought Gerard and Morena's performances were fantastic. Some really emotional moments. Wasn't perfect, I didn't agree with all the story decisions, but I thought they did a good job overall.
Frozen II (2019)
A Big Let Down
Yeah, so Frozen II was a BIIIIIG let down for me. My biggest issue was the plot, or lack thereof. I found myself excruciatingly bored throughout most of the movie. Yeah, there's a strange voice calling to Elsa, but so what? Why do I care? Why should I care? Give me a dang reason to care about what's happening!
Good plots introduce a conflict and then build upon that conflict, developing the story around that conflict, which often grows in severity, and then ultimately culminates during the climax after which the conflict is resolved. Frozen followed this formula. The initial conflict was introduced right away during the first scene, the tragic incident which separates the sisters. The rest of the movie is Anna trying to reconnect with Elsa. Not only is that an interesting conflict it makes for a compelling plot through the rest of the movie. In a good story we know what the stakes are and we are rooting for the characters to achieve their goal. In this case, Anna wants to reunite with her sister and we desperately want that for her too! We are emotionally invested in what's happening!
Another sign of a good plot is how it builds upon the initial incident (a.k.a. inciting incident). Frozen did this well. The coronation party shows their desire to reconnect but yet another wedge is driven between them. So Anna treks to the north mountain where she encounters more obstacles, seemingly insurmountable ones, to get what she desires. In the end, it looks like all is lost as Hans leaves Anna to die and comes within a hair's breadth of killing Elsa. It's a close call, but with Anna's own sacrifice the conflict is finally resolved and the characters achieve their goal...Anna and Elsa are reunited!
Frozen II has no clear initial incident with which to introduce a primary conflict. This neuters the entire story. The conflict that is there doesn't serve to advance the plot or build on any initial incident. Almost the entire movie is just Elsa wanting to figure out who is calling her and a bunch of random events that happen to her along the way. We as the audience have no idea what the stakes are and we have no real reason to root for the characters. That's because no compelling conflict was ever introduced, and with no compelling conflict the entire movie ends up being kinda boring.
I also think Kristoff's character was wasted in this film. He doesn't do a single thing to contribute to the plot, as meager as it was, and does nothing to further the story. Don't get me wrong, I enjoyed his proposal struggles, but characters who don't serve to advance the plot are poorly written, imo. This whole movie was poorly written. That's because they promoted the original writer, Jennifer Lee, to president or something, so she doesn't have time to write scripts anymore. What a tragedy.
Harriet (2019)
Prophetess?
When we talk to god it's called prayer, when god talks to us it's called schizophrenia.
Maleficent: Mistress of Evil (2019)
Better Than the First One, But Still Lacking
The beginning of the film is excellent, developing the relationship between Aurora and her godmother, which is engaging to watch. Aurora wants to marry and Maleficent doesn't trust humans. She must meet the family however and the tension and conflict between the two families, especially the two matriarchs, is wonderful. Had the rest of the film been about these things it probably would have been great, but then Maleficent goes and joins her brethren and we're introduced to a plot that has nothing to do with the story that we were introduced to. These creatures who are like Maleficent want to wage war with humankind but I'm afraid their story isn't interesting or compelling. I don't care about them or what they want, I want to get back to Aurora's relationship with Maleficent and Maleficent's conflict with the wicked queen!
It gets better in the end and I enjoyed the conclusion of the film, despite some overall silliness with a church and a pipe organ, because it focused again on the relationship between Aurora and Maleficent. They never should have strayed so far from that in the first place.
TLDR: What could have been a magnificent film was made average by poor story choices.
Shazam! (2019)
A Tale of Two Halves
The first half of the movie is really good. The hero and villain are developed quite well there. I was especially excited to see what appeared would be a well developed villain. Unfortunately, it all fell apart in the second half. As soon as the first fight happens the rest of the film is just the bad guy punching the good guy because he wants more power. If they would have continued the development they started in the first half of the movie I would have liked it a lot more.
Alita: Battle Angel (2019)
Wonderful Characters, Unfocused Story
Alita did what a good movie should always do...make you care about the characters. I was smitten with Alita from the moment she was activated and I grew to care more about her and her relationships with the other characters as the movie progressed. The action sequences were also well done. Unfortunately, there's not a clear plot here. This movie didn't know what it wanted to be about, whether it was Alita discovering herself, her budding romance with a human, her passion for MotorBall, her relationship with her "father," or defeating some nameless enemy. If it would have had a stronger plot this movie could have easily been a 9 or 10 for me, which I do not give out easily. Unfortunately, its stuck at a 7, which is still pretty good, but it could have been so much better.
Venom (2018)
Surprised by how much I liked it
I'm a self-proclaimed movie snob so, based on the reviews I'd read, I fully expected to be disappointed by this film. But my son really wanted to see it, so we went and, wow, I ended up really enjoying it!
Yes, there is some awkward dialogue and the villain is underwhelming, however, I liked the other elements so much that those issues really didn't bother me.
First off, Eddie Brock is super likable and relatable. Tom Hardy, who I've never been a fan of, knocked it out of the park with his performance of this character. I really felt for Eddie and was drawn into his plight. Though some have complained the beginning of the movie is too slow, Eddie Brock kept my interest the whole time.
Secondly, everything about Venom is super cool. The struggle between Eddie and Venom and their argumentative banter made for both some delightful conflict and laugh-out-loud comedy. Yes, there were a few lines that were duds and made me roll my eyes, but overall I thought it was fantastic.
Finally, the mix of action, horror, and comedy was done almost perfectly, in my opinion. This was a concern of mine, based on the reviews, but the flim makers pulled it off well.
All in all, we left the theater excited and thrilled and can't wait to see Venom on the big screen again. Kudos to Sony and BOOOO to the critics!
Avengers: Infinity War (2018)
Fun Movie Despite Repetitive Plot
I really enjoyed this film. It's biggest weakness was its repetitive plot, but its character interactions were pure joy and the way Thanos was developed as a character was a delight.
PROS:
Great character interactions. Seeing these heroes from diverse properties finally meet and interact in such interesting ways was really satisfying.
Well developed bad guy. Thanos is interesting and compelling as an antagonist with understandable motivations.
Genuinely funny and organic humor. The jokes were not forced and were often derived from character development, not one-liners. I laughed out loud on several occasions.
CONS:
Repetitive main plot. Instead of building and thickening throughout the film, the plot was a series of redundant scenes where Thanos tries to get a stone and the heroes try to stop him.
Less engaging action sequences. There were a few good fight scenes, but some, like the "climactic" battle in Wakanda, were a bit underwhelming.
The Man from Earth (2007)
Poorly Researched Script Full of Factual Errors
Here are just a few examples of the many, many, factual errors which interfered with my enjoyment of this movie:
1) No one thought the earth was flat in Columbus' day. Ancient Greeks had actually calculated, with surprising accuracy, the circumference of the earth According to historian Jeffrey Burton Russell, "no educated person in the history of Western Civilization from the third century B.C. onward believed that the Earth was flat."
2) The body does not renew/replace all its cells every 7 years. That is a myth and a misconception. Although its true that the lining of the stomach is renewed every few days, other parts can take a decade or more to renew and some parts stay with us from birth to death.
3) There are not different versions of the Bible. This is another misconception. There are, however, many different translations, which is different. For example, if you ask two experts to translate a Greek passage (without conferring with one another) you'll get two unique translations, but they'll both mirror the original Greek passage.
This could have been an interesting film, but early on I could not suspend my disbelief and the only way to view this film is from the perspective that it takes place in an alternate universe where our knowledge and facts don't exist. It is possible that this script writer lives in the world he created, as do many people, a world where knowledge and facts are supplanted by ignorance and bias.
Star Wars: Episode VIII - The Last Jedi (2017)
Shockingly, Surprisingly Good
First, know that I am a gigantic Star Wars fan but I had no plans to see this movie at the theater. I just knew my heart could not handle another disappointment, and it has been decades of disappointment for me, from the prequels to Episode VII and Rogue One. However, my 11 year old son begged me to take him on opening night. I couldn't be happier that he did.
Unlike VII, it does a nice job of developing interesting characters. Whereas Poe was a paper thin fighter pilot, now he's a fledgling leader driven to success despite (or because) of his personality flaws. I disliked Kylo and Rey in VII, but here an interesting relationship is developed between them that I found realistic and compelling. Luke's back story had me emotionally engaged throughout the movie.
I would have given this movie a higher score if it weren't for it's many flaws. I thought Flynn's storyline was poorly done and I still don't find him to be an interesting or necessary character. I would have liked to have seen them do more with him than just chasing McGuffins. There's a few small plot holes, too, but I'm willing to forgive them because I enjoyed the movie so much.
All things considered, I must admit that I haven't been this excited after watching a movie in a long, long time, and the fact that it's a Star Wars movie couldn't make me happier. It's a shame that Disney has brought Jar Jar Abrams back to do IX, but oh well, at least we got one good episode out of them before they screw things up again.
Murder on the Orient Express (2017)
Uninteresting Characters & Dialogue
I wasn't familiar with this story or the solution to the mystery but I knew it was popular, so imagine my surprise when I found it so uninteresting.
None of these characters are compelling in any way. How am I supposed to care about this crime when I'm not made to care about the characters? Also, why should I care if the detective solves it or not, what are the stakes? If he fails, what happens? Nothing. This movie gave me no reason to care about the story or the characters in it.
Additionally, the movie was about 90% dialogue, which isn't a problem unless the dialogue is dry and uninteresting, which I thought it was.
If you like mysteries for the sake of a mystery perhaps you'll enjoy this one, but I found it rather dull.
Thor: Ragnarok (2017)
Tries too Hard but it's Still Fun
There's a lot to like about Thor Ragnarok. Naturally, everyone's talking about the heavy dose of comedic elements, but I found that 80% of the jokes felt forced and unfunny, and 10% were misplaced. However, there were few groaners or eye-rollers so it was OK. I did like the tone of the movie, though, and Chris Hemsworth's comedy chops are quite impressive. It was nice to see him work with such diverse material. The plot wasn't great, but it was good enough.
My favorite parts of this movie were the interactions between Thor and Loki. That's such an interesting relationship and I'm glad they gave it some screen time here. Characters like Loki I find very interesting, that is, anti-heroes with complex motivations.
Everything else was pretty good, not super great, but good enough. I can recommend it.
Beauty and the Beast (2017)
A Missed Opportunity
***SPOILERS FOR THOSE WHO DON'T KNOW THE STORY***
CASTING
I liked Emma Watson as Belle, she's a fine actress and a good source of eye candy and was well cast in that role. Belle's father, on the other hand, played by Kevin Kline, was by far the weakest link in the cast. He was a poor decision to play that part and I don't think his character was written very well either. The actor who portrayed Gaston was absolutely wonderful, and although I don't care for that character in the animated version, I really enjoyed him in this movie. However, as much as I like Josh Gad I don't think he was a very good choice to play LaFou. Along with not being so well written I thought LaFou was kinda cringey in some scenes.
PLOT
I'm happy to say that the live action movie fixed most, if not all, of the plot issues I hold against the animated feature. For example, instead of having the beast begin hitting on Belle as soon as he takes her prisoner it is now portrayed as a secret collaboration by the servants to get their master together with Belle, one which the beast initially resists. This works SOOO much better, imo. However, many of the scenes are woefully underdeveloped. The wolf attack scene, for example. The beast gets a couple of bites and we're supposed to believe he's incapacitated for days? And the scene where Belle chooses to take the place of her father was not done well. It's a critical plot point but they seem to rush through it. Most egregious of these errors, though, is the handling of the climax. When the last rose petal falls and Belle thinks the beast is dead, we as the audience are caught up in the emotion of it all. She kneels down next to him and then the camera cuts to show what's going on in the rest of the castle. By the time they get back to Belle and the fallen beast my emotional investment in the scene had waned considerably. It's a travesty and a sign of poor direction or scriptwriting or both.
CONCLUSION
I did enjoy the film, warts and all, and I like it better than the animated version, however, I think it was a real missed opportunity. It could have been magnificent in the hands of better filmmakers.
Arrival (2016)
Lacking Key Components of Good Storytelling
I love sci-fi, so when I heard all the hubbub about this movie I was excited to see it.
I was disappointed.
It's like someone had a clever idea for what should have been a 30 min short film and tried to stretch it out into a 2 hour movie. These characters are never developed. I know nothing about their personal goals or desires, and they don't change at all, they have no arc. They are cardboard stand-ins so that the writer can flesh out their clever plot idea.
There's also very little conflict here, and a good plot needs good conflict. So without a good plot or character development, the film felt quite empty.
Captain America: Civil War (2016)
Great Fights, Boring Movie
I'm a big fan of traditional storytelling. What I mean is, the plot should start off with an inciting incident which introduces the conflict that sets the story in action. The plot should build on this conflict until it is resolved in the climax.
But I felt like this movie was all over the place.
The climax is a confrontation between Steve and Tony (not a spoiler, it was shown in the trailers), which could have been great if the rest of the movie built up to that. But the inciting incident started a plot about collateral damage, political will, government oversight, and the responsibility of super heroes.
Even these themes were not developed very well, imo, as we jumped from random location to random location, the script writers seemingly caring more about groping for reasons to make these heroes fight than putting together any compelling narrative. Then, in the end, the conflict isn't even addressed or resolved. The climax is basically an unrelated (to the plot) fight scene introduced by a random video.
I found it to be a messy movie and I was thoroughly disappointed.
Star Wars: Episode VII - The Force Awakens (2015)
A Disappointment on Every Level
This film was a huge disappointment to me. Here's why:
1) CHARACTERS
Rey - An obvious Mary Sue. Mary Sue characters are BORING. There's a reason they are so passionately argued against by lovers of great storytelling.
Finn - Paper thin. He has zero depth. Maybe one of the most boring Star Wars main characters of all time.
Kylo Ren - A sissy. He was not a compelling villain in any sense of the term. I liked Darth Maul better and he had barely more than 10 mins of screen time in The Phantom Menace.
2) STORY
Completely Unoriginal - I felt like they cut and pasted the story elements from the first three films to make this script.
3) PLOT
What's the Plot? - They're trying to find Luke. Honestly, I can't even remember why now. Then they have to destroy another death star. :YAWN:
It makes me sad that this film is doing so well at the box office. I hate to see mediocrity so well rewarded.
Ex Machina (2014)
Fantastically Engaging From Beginning to End
I watched this on VidAngel recently, and was astounded at how much I enjoyed this film. There were really only three actors and just a few locations, minimalism at its finest. In fact, this could have been made for the stage as well as it was made for the screen. At any rate, from the very first scene to the rolling of the credits I was completely intrigued.
The plot, too be sure, progressed wonderfully. The pacing is excellent and the mystery held my interest throughout, with a satisfying twist at the end. But it's the character interaction that really makes this film shine.
The dialogue is superb. Well crafted and realistic it makes the characters and their relationships with one another the centerpiece of this film. The characters are exquisitely defined and the acting top notch, completely drawing me into the story. Nathan and Ava are especially fascinating character studies, and long after the film had ended I found myself thinking about them and the way they were portrayed.
This is a true gem of a film, and it makes me sad that it didn't attract the attention it deserves. I hope it makes up for this in its life as a DVD.