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Napoleon (2023)
I Think The Wrong Edit Went to Theaters
The movie is like falling out of bed from a wicked hangover, starting suddenly and violently, then dragging along, not making much sense trying to get by. Still, after some good food and coffee, it picks up and accomplishes something decent.
I'm no editing director, but HOLY JUMPCUT BATMAN, let's cram fifty 20-second scenes together to explain the France of it all. I honestly went from almost walking out to really enjoying the movie. After the first battle, the average scene length was about twenty-five seconds, and yes, I started counting, writing down, and averaging them because when the tism hits, it hits hard. Anyway, like everyone else, I'm going to watch the director's cut when it comes out, and I urge you to forgo the theater and wait for that release.
The Battle scenes are genuinely impressive, and I would have preferred the theater version to be all the battle scenes cut together with Joaquin Phoenix staring longingly into the camera; what's not to like about that? Anyway, I did end up enjoying the movie, and I look forward to seeing what it was supposed to be in the director's cut.
Five Nights at Freddy's (2023)
I didn't play the games but I watched markiplier
Going into the movie I had a basic concept of the games not necessarily the whole storyline, but I at least watched a solid amount of play-through. I enjoyed the movie. I thought that the story was pretty solid. I can't complain. I I think compared to a lot of other movies that are coming out now, or have come out in the past that are video game adaptations five nights at Freddy's sets a pretty solid standard again I don't know how accurate the storyline is but the movie quality and production was good enough for me. I thought the costume design was solid, but the effects so a little flat. I don't know what the production budget was, but I think they could've sprung a little more for the CGI parts.
ALL IN ALL
If you haven't played the games, it's a good movie. If you have played the games, feel free to be critical I'm not the expert.
All the Light We Cannot See (2023)
mArK RuFfaLo *in a Parisian accent*
Ok firstly, I enjoyed the movie. I thought it was pretty solid as someone who loves World War II movies. However, I'm sorry Mark Ruffalo. I love you, but what was that accent? Every other actor did a fantastic job and listen as an American I know French accents are not easy or French English mix, accent, or what was said to be a Parisian accent. I'm no expert, but there's no way that was even close to a Parisian accent. Anyone can feel free to correct me, but I struggled to take his character seriously every time he opened his mouth I was distracted and again I really enjoyed the movie. I mean Hugh Laurie, swinging a machine gun fantastic! Aria Mia Loberti was amazing and I didn't realize when I first saw the movie that she was actually blind but it makes sense, fantastic performance by everyone else so my one problem is that Mark Ruffalo really took me out of the story and I know it sounds minor, but it was so distracting that it prevented me from truly enjoying the movie.
Oppenheimer (2023)
A Cinematographers Wet Dream
THE VISUALS
Firstly, yes, I saw it in IMAX and yes it was worth it literally stripping everything else away. This is a visual masterpiece and the three hour run time left me wanting more. If you're like me, or are even remotely interested in cinematography or effects design, you owe it to yourself to see this movie.
THE STORY
I'll admit I fell pray to the same idea as everyone else hoping that there would be more about the bomb and less about the personal life of Oppenheimer but the movie is titled Oppenheimer for a reason I was not disappointed by this but any history nerd would've liked a little more screen time for the bomb. I found the pace very acceptable not too slow, and the cuts between black and white and color, I felt were a good way to represent the timelines and points of view of the characters. Some people had an issue with this, but I felt like it tied everything together instead of split things apart.
THE ACTING
(Having not known Oppenheimer personally) like some seem to complain like they did I can't say how accurate Cillian's performance was, but for me, it felt spot on. I think he was tailor made for this role.
MAtT dAmON
It's not that he did a bad job. I just feel like there could've been a lot of better options to play general Leslie Groves. I was a little distracted from his character because it felt like he was trying to be something that wasn't Leslie Groves. I know it's a movie and historical accuracy can only go so far in Hollywood but I just kept asking myself why Matt Damon?
ALL IN ALL
If you like history, if you like Christopher Nolan, if you like cinematography, see the movie, you won't regret it.
Devil in Ohio (2022)
A Cult in Ohio? Oh it's not The Ohio State University
Jokes aside this is a fantastic mini series so binge worthy I watched it all in a day. This show really manages to capture everything that I feel my generation wanted in a show and I don't doubt Netflix knows this. The show is very exciting I had to keep my guard up watching it I really didn't know what might happen next the acting is phenomenal, sure there are some mini plot lines that didn't seem too important but I understand how it all pulls together. It's a perfect combo of mystery/horror/thriller. All in all this is a great show and I highly recommend watching it but fair warning once you start you're not gonna want to stop watching.
Thor: Love and Thunder (2022)
Love and Blunder (It's a parody right?)
I'm really not sure what they were trying to do here... it's a funny movie but I don't think it was supposed to be. If you took out Christian Bale's performance "Love and Thunder" is more akin to SpaceBalls than any Marvel movie. The "comic relief" feels painfully forced and it gets old quick. There was a lot of potential here for a fun Thor movie but it came across as more silly than anything else. The plot was there but the script seemed like it was written by a 14 year old who likes fart jokes. It could have been worse but it also could have been a lot better. Overall disappointed hopefully Marvel can recover from this one.
The Gray Man (2022)
Location *IMDb Review Section*
Listen there are situations where telling us the location with title text is necessary but this movie takes the cake for overkill. I don't think there's a single location change that isn't accompanied by title text. That aside, this movie is seriously non stop action and it's really enjoyable if you like lots of explosions and fights and who doesn't enjoy another CIA off the books unhinged action hero.
Let's talk Chris Evens as a bad guy, it was difficult at first to see him as anything but the wholesome Steve Rogers but dang if he didn't play this role well! Is it the mustache? Maybe the prep boy outfit? I don't know but it turns out Captain can be a bad boy so props to Evens for taking on a non type role for himself. Ryan Gosling really plays up the strong silent type and we get a little bit of back story on his character about halfway through the move but besides that not a whole lot of depth but again this is a non stop action movie and I didn't expect deep character building. All in all this is a ACTION movie and a pretty good one, so for fun filled explosions give it a watch!
Day Shift (2022)
Snoop That Hat is Backwards
If you notice his cowboy hat will switch to the right and wrong way around in a couple of shots. As someone who wears a cowboy hat it's not that hard to know which way is the front. Also that no one caught the mistake is funny. Anyway beside that it's a fun movie. It's a turn your brain off and enjoy type of movie.
Top Gun: Maverick (2022)
Exactly What We Wanted
This is the essence of Hollywood, A list actors, jet planes, explosions, USA, and the ole love interest. As someone born in the 90's I didn't see the original in it's hay day but I still love the original. That being said I liked this one more, it's just a dang good fun action movie no need to over analyze because JETS. Don't think too much just enjoy it!
Greyhound (2020)
It's WW2 it's Tom Hanks What's Not to Like
I'm a history buff and I love Tom Hanks. Greyhound is one of my new favorites when it comes to period correct war films. You will not be disappointed by this movie I promise.
Doctor Strange in the Multiverse of Madness (2022)
WHOA WANDA
First off I'm no VFX expert but I thought the effects were solid I don't get the hate. This is a solid Marvel movie nothing exceedingly special except maybe the surprise appearances, I won't say who as to avoid spoilers but trust me it will excite you. Marvel does a great job of making "villains" relatable and I think this is their best work yet. Olsen steals the show with a stellar performance and credit to Xochitl Gomez as a newcomer who fit right in with the rest of the cast. This movie is clearly doing a lot of setup for what's next for the MCU which takes away a little bit from its own story but it's not worth writing off the whole movie. All in all, it's a solid Movie with the understanding that its purpose is to build foundation for Marvels next phase.
The Sandman (2022)
*turns up brightness* Its a Dark Show
Jokes aside this is probably DCs darkest show both literally and figuratively. As someone who doesn't read the comics and isn't a huge DC guy I'm enjoying this show. It has some slow points but they aren't worth writing the show off, DC likes to build its characters and I respect that so some info dumps are expected. I wouldn't call this a binge more a slow burn but it works for the story. My hat is off to Tom Sturridge who went all in for this character the way he speaks really is mesmerizing like a dream. If you want a dark gothic DC show this is the one for you.
Ms. Marvel (2022)
Marvel Done Right
This is a Marvel show done right, great story building giving real depth to the characters. Out of phase four I think this is the best show so far. After seeing how well a Marvel character can be written I was surprised what happen next *caugh* She Hulk. The historical connection about the India/Pakistan separation really put this one on top for me. I love it when lore incorporates real historical events as well as adding deeper emotional connections to the characters. I highly recommend this show!
The Orville (2017)
It's Not a Spoof of Star Trek and that's Good
First off, I'm not a huge Seth McFarland fan so I was hesitant to start the show, expecting this to be the Space Balls to Star Trek. However, once I watched season one I was hooked, well layered comedy and action on top of interesting world building really made this show pop in the first two seasons! New Horizons, it didn't work for me. I know a lot happened between seasons two and three but it was a little to much change in a direction I didn't enjoy. New Horizons felt like it lost a lot of the comedy aspect and started taking itself a little too seriously. Like I said in the beginning it's not a spoof show and that's not what I wanted, however, the silliness in one and two was enjoyable. All in all, we will see what happens in season 4 after Disney gets its fingers in it hopefully it will recover what I felt it lost from New Horizons.
GLOW (2017)
A Great Binge
Seasons one and two get ten stars but I felt that season three fell a little flat. It seemed like a lot of the setup in one and two amounted to nothing in season three. I'm not saying it ruined the series just that it didn't have the same magic. Again this is a positive review of the show it's a great story with phenomenal acting and I watched all three seasons in a week. It layers the drama and comedy very well and I recommend giving it a watch!
The Batman (2022)
"Joker" (but it's Batman)
If you really liked "Joker" then you'll probably like "The Batman." Let me clarify, I'm not hating on "Joker" which has its place as a stand alone movie in DC in my opinion and I love a dark complex character just as much as anyone, but I also like seeing Batman beat the sh** out of bad guys and explosions. This movie just felt like it was trying to do too much in one movie. I actually fell asleep the first time I saw it now granted that was after quite a few drinks at an 11:00pm showing but I did rewatch it later and realized the good portion I slept through didn't change anything. That being said, it does have its moments and the few scenes of an unhinged Batman are fantastic but that's what I saw in the trailers and I wanted more. I understand that with a new Batman movie you need to add to the story but I felt like the writers just didn't know how to end it. I'm not saying it's a terrible movie or that I hated it, it just wasn't the Batman for me.
Barry (2018)
What Perfectly Timed Comic Relief Looks Like
This is a great show I highly recommend it. Barry has drama, action, thrill, and lots of laughs. Like I said, if you enjoy well timed comic relief this is the show for you. Also, Bill Haders performance is perfect and I can't imagine anyone else in this role.
What We Do in the Shadows (2019)
A Workplace Comedy (but with vampires)
I know it may sound strange to call this a workplace comedy but if a vampires job is to hunt and overall be a vampire then it fits. The show has that Office, Parks and Rec type vibe but add Vampires and yes it works and I love it. The show is funny and feels refreshingly original. I recommend this show to anyone who enjoys workplace comedies, vampires, or just wants to laugh. (Also it has a dope soundtrack)
Only Murders in the Building (2021)
Does Selena Gomez Have Lockjaw?
Not my typical review because I feel like I might be the only one bothered by this. Firstly, I promise I really like the show and before anyone says it yes I know Gomez's character is supposed to be like that, but the monotone and stiff Mabel keeps distracting me from the story. Like, I struggle to take her seriously I know it's not Gomez herself because she is a good actor so clearly that's how the director wanted Mabel to talk and act. I really wander if anyone else feels this way because I know it's a specific little thing but I can't get over it. So, besides that personal issue it's a good show and I highly recommend it.
Uncharted (2022)
Turn Your Brain Off Type Movie
It wasn't terrible but it wasn't great. It's a $120 million dollar video game adaptation movie. It's not national treasure 3 so don't get your hopes up in that regard. Tom Holland basically plays himself as a treasure hunter but no complaints there. The plot is meh but again if you want some dumb fun and adventure turn your brain off and enjoy.
The Rescue (2021)
My favorite Nat Geo documentary yet
This really is a fantastic documentary with the whole in-depth story of what we all saw on the news. I've probably watched this documentary three times because it really does amaze me what happened and the outcome. It's an emotional story with real life heroes that I highly recommend watching.
Xin xi ju zhi wang (2019)
Stephen Chow Drama? Don't worry the Comedy is there
As a English speaking American I didn't think I would find myself here, however I recently rewatched Kung Fu hustle which at that point was the only Chow movie I had seen and decided to go down the Stephen Chow rabbit hole arriving here. Whoever said comedy doesn't translate was wrong because I don't speak mandarin and this movie had me actually laughing. It does depart from Chows typical over the top style but I loved it. This movie had a perfect amount of comedy and drama for me and I'd highly recommend giving it a shot.
Hector and the Search for Happiness (2014)
The Secret Life of Walter Mitty but (R)
Yes that's what it is but I loved it. Okay maybe they're not exactly the same but come on who didn't want a gritty version of The Secret Life of Walter Mitty. This is a good movie and Simon Pegg delivers a classic Simon Pegg type performance we all enjoy.
Dark (2017)
A Truly Original Story
You've heard it before but I'll say it again, watch it in its original German with subtitles.
If you enjoy mind bending shows that keep you guessing Dark is for you. This show kept me fully engaged in every episode and despite my extreme ADHD I was able to watch it all with just the subs. Please don't be hesitant to invest in this show just because it's not in English trust me, I get it, it's not the same when you have to read but it's 100% worth it.
Stranger Things (2016)
I get it there's going to be a 5th season
(Season 4) I think this season started off strong and I have no issues with previous seasons, but about halfway through I felt like the story completely stalled out in an attempt to set up for season 5. I understand the necessity for build up in a multi season show especially if you know season 5 will be the end, but for 30 million an episode I expected just a tad more rounding out of season 4. At this point I had settled into the Stranger Things season formula which I really enjoyed, when season 4 departed from that I felt a little disappointed. All that aside I do really enjoy the show and I recommend it to others!
(Complete sidenote) Why did they make Robin so different? Am I the only one that felt like her character completely changed without any explanation?