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Reviews
Rock Hudson: All That Heaven Allowed (2023)
A Doc Unworthy of Rock Hudson
An icon as beloved as Rock Hudson deserves a thorough, thoughtful, and multifaceted documentary. So why is it that he got one that focuses so heavily on his sexuality and conquests, and not nearly enough on the man himself? No person is defined simply by their sexual orientation and nor should they be. This is especially true of one of the biggest movie stars of the '50s and '60s. Going from the Midwest to Hollywood, experiencing the ups and downs of stardom, and being closeted all the while all must affect someone in various ways. But we don't really learn how in this doc. Instead, it consists mostly of interviews with men he had flings with. There is some good insight here and there, but it mostly gets lost amongst talk of his romantic relationships.
Perhaps he was just too private for any truly meaningful content to be put together about him. If that's the case, it probably wasn't worth making this. I also seriously question the director's abilities because, as another review said, the movie clip usage grew tiresome and was uncomfortable at times. There were also a couple of highly unnecessary crude comments about Rock that were inexplicably not edited out.
I personally don't think Rock would appreciate his sexuality being the biggest talking point because I don't think anyone would. He was so much more than that. This is a skip.
The Bear (2022)
Chicago Done Right
Every once in a while, a movie or tv show will take you by surprise in just how utterly raw and well crafted it is- The Bear is one of those shows. Now, I have never worked in the culinary industry, but the first thing that hit me in the pilot was the portrayal of the kitchen scenes. Despite having zero experience, I knew right away that *this* is what working in a restaurant is like. There is yelling and running around, yet it is controlled chaos.
The second thing that hit me is the characters. They are all intensely relatable, particularly the main character, Carmy. Despite cussing each other out on a regular basis, there is a running theme of taking care of the people around you and not being afraid of admitting your shortcomings. Their struggles are all too real at times and can be a complete gut punch.
Finally, I was hit by the city itself. I was born and raised in Chicago, so I was both anxious and trepidatious to see how it would be portrayed. Somehow, it exceeded my expectations. From the scenery, to the inside jokes, to the iconic landmarks, this is Chicago in all its glory.
The Bear is here; this Chicagoan approves.
The Prince & Me (2004)
Fun & Refreshing
I decided to write a review for this movie because it appears that people still feel the need to rip on it to this very day. I considered giving The Prince & Me a 10 star rating to offset the harsh 1 star ratings, but I ultimately chose not to because I want to paint a fair picture of this movie. To address the predictability issue- yes, it's predictable. There is a second breakup that is actually not typical for romance movies and where we leave their relationship is refreshing and somewhat unique.
In terms of the Denmark inaccuracies, frustrating though they may be, most of them are not a terribly big deal. The biggest gaffe is probably the royals being politically active in a way that suggests an unrealistic amount of power. I also noticed people commenting on the names and, outside of Edvard, I do believe that the royal family's names are not Danish.
The "Girls Gone Wild" thing and the way it is paid off only serves to make Edvard an ignorant fool and I wish they hadn't gone there.
All that being said, this is a rom-com from 2004 and that should tell you what to expect. The acting is good, the chemistry is good, and there are some funny moments. It's just a fun time with an earnest and important message.
Gossip Girl (2021)
Misguided and Missing the Point
I will keep this as brief as I can, because there isn't a whole lot to say here.
This reboot utterly misses the point of why the Gossip Girl was invented in the first place. As twisted as it was at times, it ultimately came from Dan Humphrey's fascination with the Upper East Side. It came from a desire to be a part of that world. In this new one, it comes from the teachers wanting to blow s*** up to keep the rich kids in line. In other words, Gossip Girl is coming from a place of malice.
That's not to say Gossip Girl is untouchable IP, but there was something truly special about the original (at least for the first couple of seasons), so there is still legacy to be mindful of. Unfortunately, this reboot is just not bothered by it outside of a few name drops. Speaking of which- comparing Nate Archibald to Caroline Kennedy and Colson Whitehead? You've got to be kidding.
This show is also hurt by the fact that instead of Blair vs Serena being the sticking point, it's Blair vs Jenny. I liked Jenny in the original, but was she one of the reasons I watched the show? ABSOLUTELY not. She was boring then and she's boring now. The characters in general are fine in this one, but I feel charisma/screen presence is lacking, with a few exceptions. I personally was more interested in the teachers. Thomas Dougherty easily is the most charismatic, but strangely, doesn't seem to be featured much.
There was a lot of potential here, but the concept is flawed at its core. Josh Schwartz's absence is real.
Rebel (2021)
Talent Wasted on Network TV
Where to begin? Rebel isn't necessarily a bad idea, but a show inspired by Erin Brockovich does not belong on basic cable. The worst part is the painful waste of talent. Katey deserves better, Kevin Zegers deserves better, and Andy Garcia deserves 100 times better.
And then there's Marc Webb, who has unjustly been relegated to TV directing after Sony manhandled his Amazing Spider-Man movies. It's not right and my heart goes out to him.
Finally, to talk briefly about the "wokeness" of it all, it does feel a bit forced. I don't know about Erin's kids, but Rebel's are all different races (if I'm not mistaken) and that is extremely uncommon in real life.
There are other small issues as well, such as feminist scenes that are a bit too overt and the main character behaving outlandishly. Overall, this show just makes me want to watch the Julia Roberts movie again.
Rebel never had a legitimate chance on ABC, and as a result, is a disservice to almost everyone involved.
Ted Lasso (2020)
A Beautiful Show about the Beautiful Game
I could go on and on about the impeccable writing. I could gush about the moving and heartfelt performances, particularly that of Jason Sudeikis. I could rave about a cast of characters that any network would kill for. But I won't do any of that because the only thing that anyone needs to know is that this show is fantastic. It's heart is so huge it nearly made mine explode. Ted Lasso is exactly what the world needed during the pandemic- a means to exorcise pain, and a source of joy.
Football is life. Ted Lasso is love.
High School Musical 3: Senior Year (2008)
HSM Done Right
First of all, the rating on here is ridiculously low and I can only assume it is the result of a smear campaign by anti-HSM folks.
With that out of the way, this movie is straight up good- not just for HSM, but for any kind of movie. This movie is clean, but NOT cheesy like some would have you believe...until Troy's speech at the end when Peter Barsocchini unfortunately throws caution to the wind. The acting is enjoyable all around, though you will either love or hate Jimmy and Tiara. Their presence, however, comes with collateral damage: legacy characters such as Ryan are pushed aside to make room for them, though it is somewhat understandable when they were planning to continue the franchise with them at the time.
The musical numbers are better than ever and the writing has found its sweet spot, with the dialogue finally sounding 100% natural. The costume department also finally got it right after brutally missing the mark with Troy's wardrobe in HSM 2 and doing OK for the era in the first one. Lastly, this movie just LOOKS more professional. You wouldn't be able to tell that such a huge chunk of the budget went to actors' salaries because some of the numbers look like real money was spent on them and the whole production is incredibly polished.
Overall, this movie is funny, entertaining, and HSM at its best. Warning to fans: the ending will hit where it hurts.
7.5/10
Big Fat Liar 2 (2017)
Big Fat Clunker
I apologize in advance- this review is a bit on the scathing side. But deservedly so, as studios need to realize that if sequels/remakes/reboots are going to be greenlit, they need to be at least remotely worthwhile.
When I first saw this on Netflix, I was both shocked and excited; I had not heard about a remake of Big Fat Liar being in the works, but BFL was one of my absolute favorite movies as a kid, so I was hopeful about a fresh take on the story. This movie also had quite a bit of storytelling potential as far as explaining why the main character lied so much and why his friend put up with his nonsense for so long.
And then I saw no trace of Dan Schneider in the writing/producing credits. That was a hard pill to swallow, as he was the reason the original was so much fun, but still, I went into it cautiously optimistic. After all, I enjoyed Ricky Garcia and Jodelle Ferland in other things...
Twenty minutes in, I knew. I kept telling myself it could get better, so I stuck it out 'til the end, but it just didn't.
I'll start with the writing. It's awful. There were inconsistencies as glaring as the name of the video game in question; it switched between Bigger Fatter Liar and Big Fat Liar, so after watching the movie, I'm still not sure what the actual name is. Not to mention, I could swear Wolf's first name is Larry in the movie, but on IMDb he's listed as Alan. What? The biggest issue with the writing, however, is that it lacks everything that made Big Fat Liar special: quirkiness, charm, and most of all, LIFE. The remake was devoid of all of it. It didn't help that Wolf went from turning into a brightly colored clown to a black- and-white mime. Ironically fitting, however, as the new Wolf actor utterly paled in comparison to the brilliance of Paul Giamatti.
That brings me to the acting. Again, lifeless. The actors in the original oozed charisma and personality, whereas it is the complete opposite here.
Ricky Garcia- He's great as the lovable Naldo in Best Friends Whenever, but he clearly struggled with this role. I think Naldo is just easier to play, being the cartoonish Disney Channel sidekick that he is.
Jodelle Ferland- She was the one person who turned in a decent performance most of the time, but she is no Amanda Bynes and was held back by a lack of good material to work with.
Barry Bostwick- I'm not familiar with his past work, but from his credits I can tell that he's a respectable actor, so it's clear to me that he was more held back than anyone else. His performance was nothing special, but again, his material was nothing special.
Basically, this movie was written and directed by a guy who does Hallmark movies, and it showed.
Simply put, it just didn't work.
Don't waste time on this remake and go watch Big Fat Liar(2002) if you haven't already. You'll thank me later.
Andi Mack (2017)
Disney Channel is Back
For most of my life, I had been a Disney Channel die-hard. This lasted up until my mid-teens, when the network's downward spiral became too much to bare. The series I connected with the most growing up was Lizzie McGuire, so when it was announced that Disney Channel picked up a new series from Lizzie's creator Terri Minsky, I was ecstatic and full of new-found hope. To top it off, the premise sounded cute and refreshingly normal in comparison to most of DC's current content.
Disney Channel desperately needed SOMETHING to reestablish its legitimacy in tween programming; Girl Meets World and Best Friends Whenever showed promise, but never delivered on it; Stuck in the Middle is a huge step in the right direction, but still a bit too squeaky clean. Finally, we have Andi Mack. Something about it just feels real, whether it be the use of actually locations or the lack of a laugh track (please continue with these trends, Disney!). The young actress in the title role is adorable and shows real talent from the start.
That's not all, folks. There's a twist that is absolutely shocking for Disney Channel, and there's even a period joke in the first episode! That's right, Disney Channel has guts again.
Disney Channel desperately needed SOMETHING.
Andi Mack is it.
The Crown (2016)
Long Live The Crown
If you are looking for a fantastic historical drama about what it means to be a (British) royal, look no further than The Crown. But be warned: if you are looking for a series that gushes over the royal family, I implore you to look elsewhere, for this is not that show. Whilst being a royal looks glamorous on the outside, it is quite a different story behind the glitz. I will just say this: prior to watching The Crown, I was a supporter of the British monarchy; now, not so much.
Like any family, the British royals have weathered trials and tribulations, which is exactly what is at the heart of The Crown. The actors perform the stories stunningly, as do the sets, costumes, etc. Her Majesty herself, Claire Foy, embodies the role perfectly, though is a bit subdued compared to most of the other characters. Jared Harris is a joy to watch as King George VI. The real star of the show, however, is Matt Smith. He steals every scene he appears in and breathes life into an otherwise (but understandably) stuffy show.
The Crown would get 10 stars from me if not for two things: the first being that finale isn't as climactic and interesting as previous episodes; the second is the casting of Winston Churchill. John Lithgow puts in fine work here and a good accent to boot, but that does not negate the fact that he is an American and Churchill was most certainly NOT. Being as unnecessary as it is, this casting choice borders on unforgivable.
At the heart of The Crown is fascinating insight into what Queen Elizabeth II and the royal family were like as people behind closed doors (50 years ago); it doesn't take long to realize that these people, despite their titles and lifestyles, are as human as any of us.
Bernie (2011)
Texas to a "T"
I would like to start off by saying I didn't much care for Jack Black prior to Bernie. I am now a huge fan.
Being a resident of Texas, I was instantly intrigued by this movie. When I heard all of the positive chatter, I knew I had to give it a watch. No regrets whatsoever.
The cast and directing make for a fantastic combo. Black's performance as the title character, Bernie Tiede, is unquestionably deserving of recognition. Shirley MacLaine is wonderfully wicked and Matthew McConaughey is pure, unadulterated perfection in what little screen time he is given.
Richard Linklater captured Texas perfectly, particularly small-town Texas. One of the best bits of the movie is the different "states of Texas," which could not be more accurate. However, I only rated it as high as an 8 out of 10 because the pacing is not so hot and there really wasn't much of an effort to take the audience back to the 90s.
A must see for all Texans, especially those born and raised.
Phineas and Ferb the Movie: Across the 2nd Dimension (2011)
Phineas and Ferb Strike Again
Going into it, I figured this movie would be pretty decent, seeing as it's Phineas and Ferb. But alas, I was wrong. It was GREAT. 'Across the 2nd Dimension' stayed extremely true to the show. It has the same fun, wild, free spirit and takes you for one heck of a ride. You get to experience an entirely new dimension of the Phineas and Ferb world, one where Doofenshmirtz isn't so doofy. At first it seems cool, but the gang later realizes how grateful they are for their own dimension-and their platypus.
Spoil anything I will not, so give this one a watch. Trust me, you won't regret it. It will have been well worth your time.
A must see for die-hard fans and casual fans alike. A solid 10/10.
A Fairly Odd Movie: Grow Up, Timmy Turner! (2011)
An Absolute Joke
This movie is so bad that it left me speechless when it was over. All I keep asking myself was WHY WHY WHY? Some films are so bad that all you can do is laugh. "A Fairly Odd Movie" is not one of them. I just stared in utter horror the entire way through. Everything about this movie was wrong: making it live action, Timmy's casting, the script...everything. How they got Jason Alexander to sign on I'll never know.
Most of all, this heaping pile of poop is a disgrace to "The Fairly Odd Parents".
"A Fairly Odd Movie" was just so unnecessary. The moron who green-lighted it needs to be fired. Nickelodeon should be ashamed.
Small Soldiers (1998)
A Solid Answer to Disney/Pixar's Toy Story
Let's be honest, the concept of Small Soldiers(toys coming to life) came from Toy Story. However, DreamWorks came up with a MUCH different plot and the result is a great-and grossly underrated-family movie/action flick with top notch CGI.
I'm sure many say DreamWorks is a poor man's Disney/Pixar, and I agree, but this one movie in which DreamWorks shines. One might argue that the Commandos are glorified G.I. Joes, but I will gladly look past that because, c'mon, they're awesome.
Small Soldiers is a fine piece of entertainment and some of DreamWorks' best work to boot. I am begging you, don't pass it up. You won't regret giving it your time.
Mortal Kombat (1995)
An Immortal Classic
Mortal Kombat is, in a word, awesome. It is one of the few video game adaptations that doesn't suck so bad you want to cry. No, it gets the job done-the right way. The fight scenes are beautifully choreographed by none other than Liu Kang himself-Robin Shou. It is also very well cast and decently acted. Cary-Hiroyuki Tagawa is fantastic as Shang Tsung, the designated 'bad guy' of the Mortal Kombat world.
There's not much more I can say about this movie except that it will always be a classic in my eyes. Maybe the effects are a tad cheesy, but who cares? That just makes it all the more fun. I urge all Mortal Kombat fans to give this movie a chance-I promise, you won't regret it. The constant flow of action will keep you immersed the entire time. This one will not disappoint.
Water for Elephants (2011)
One Spectacular Show
Readers, fear not. This is one adaption that lives up to the book.
Water for Elephants is pure beauty. Despite the fact that it takes place during the Depression, it makes you almost wish you lived during the '30s.
One reason is the costumes. They are wonderfully done, as well as the makeup. Another is the eye candy. No, I'm not talking about Robert Pattinson(though he looks as gorgeous as ever). I'm talking about the breathtaking cinematography, courtesy of Rodrigo Prieto.
While the leads(Robert Pattinson, Reese Witherspoon, Christoph Waltz) all turn in GREAT performances, the real star here is Tai the elephant. She plays Rosie, the newest addition to The Benzini Bros. Most Spectacular Show on Earth, who is brought in in hopes of taking The Benzini Bros. circus to a new level(particularly to the level of Ringling Bros.).
As per usual, there are quite a few changes that may or may not irritate the readers. It all depends on the person. One that I felt was an improvement upon the book, however, was the combining of August and Uncle Al. I honestly didn't miss Al one bit.
Water for Elephants is a beautiful, enchanting, mesmerizing must-see.
Beastly (2011)
Embrace the Suck
Nine months I have waited for this movie. Nine whole months. Boy, was it worth it.
Charming, witty, and everything you could want in a teen flick, "Beastly" modernizes an age old tale, and it does it right. Neil Patrick Harris steals every scene he's in as Kyle's blind tutor Will, and Mary-Kate Olsen shines as Kendra the witch. The film's leads, Alex Pettyfer and Vanessa Hudgens, lack in neither chemistry nor the acting department. While Vanessa Hudgens is clearly the weak link of the bunch, even her performance could have been much worse.
The strange thing about Alex Pettyfer is that he always comes off as so sweet and sincere in his movies, but in real life he seems a tad full of himself. In all honesty, it saddens me. I'd be lying if I said I didn't wish he was like the characters he plays. That's actors for you, I guess.
"Beastly" is utterly beautiful. In the beginning, Kyle is a shallow, egotistical jerk. But when he's served a piping hot slice of humble pie, compliments of Kendra, he becomes Hunter, the guy he he should have been all along. Perhaps one of the best parts of the movie was watching him try to woo Lindy. When his attempts to buy Lindy's love fail, Hunter stomps his feet and whines like a child. It's so adorable that you can't help but smile.
With that said, there ARE some predicaments from which "Beastly" suffers. If you liked the book, you'll probably be disappointed to know that the library was ultimately traded in for the greenhouse. My heart nearly broke in half at this realization. However, I eventually got over that, as there is an even bigger problem: the ending. Simply put, the book's ending is 10 million times better. The ending in the movie is not nearly as powerful, and, at the end of the day, lackluster.
Aside from some slightly irritating name changes(i.e. Kingsbury to Kingson, Adrian to Hunter, Magda to Zola), the only other issues I had with the film were Kendra's role being downsized and the omission of the magic mirror. As for the re-shoots, you obviously couldn't see the difference in Alex's appearance when he was in full prosthetics, but his physical maturation was definitely noticeable at the end.
Don't let the name deceive you, "Beastly" is anything but.
Hellcats (2010)
A Show Worth Cheering About
As of late, Vampire Diaries is the highest rated show on the CW, averaging 3-4 million viewers each episode. But me? I'd rather watch a show about competitive cheerleading ANY DAY.
I have been itching for a TV series about cheerleading ever since I saw Bring It On, and as a result I had high hopes for Hellcats.
Said hopes were pretty much blown out of the water.
Hellcats is not only quite well written, but well acted to boot. Many criticize Aly Michalka's acting, but I feel that she holds her own along side the other actors.
However, the real star to keep an eye out for is the lovely Heather Hemmons. Hemmons adds real depth to the role of Alice Verdura. Every week we find another layer to peel away, and another reason to love both Heather and her character.
The entire cast is gorgeous, and the gentlemen are no exception. Jeff Hephner, Robbie Jones, Matt Barr, Ryan Kennedy, (and did I say Jeff Hephner?) all very nice eye candy.
Everything about Hellcats works, and that's part of what makes it so great.
Shows like this just don't come around every day.
The Social Network (2010)
An Exorcise in Filmmaking
Let me begin this review by saying, this film is NOT about Facebook. No, this film is about one Mark Zuckerberg and his tumultuous journey to success in becoming the youngest billionaire in the world.
Firstly, the performances. The entire cast was phenomenal. Each and every actor gave it their all, and not one of them came up short. Even Justin Timberlake gave a very strong performance. Brenda Song, though she didn't have a large role, was surprisingly solid as well. There is a lot of Oscar Buzz surrounding these young actors, and I truly hope both Jesse Eisenberg and Andrew Garfield receive nominations.
Next, the writing. Aaron Sorkin's screenplay is nothing short of ingenious. He should win an Oscar for conceiving the words 'Seanathon' and 'Winklevai' alone.
Let's not forget the score. Trent Reznor and Atticus Ross composed a score that is beyond words. These two gentlement deserve nothing less than an Oscar.
A cinematic masterpiece, 'The Social Network' defines our generation and deserves every award it can get.
Boy Meets World (1993)
Great Show
I grew up with "Boy Meets World". My friends and I always used to watch it together and I felt like I was watching real life but on a television screen. "Boy Meets World" dealt with real issues that I could totally relate to. I miss watching it with my friends at sleepovers and without a doubt wish it wasn't canceled. "Boy meets World" was a part of my childhood that I will never forget. In some ways, I feel like this show helped me grow up into the mature girl I am today. I recommend this show for kids ages 10 and up. Even though they are only showing re-runs, they are still pretty fun to watch. This show is held very close to my heart and I will never forget it.