One of my least favourite films/musicals featuring Esther Williams, along with 'Texas Carnival' and 'Jupiter's Darling'. All three watchable but very flawed. 'Skirts Ahoy!' is not a sinking dud, but considering the talent involved (as well as Williams, there's Vivian Blaine, Debbie Reynolds, Bobby Van and songs penned by Harry Warren and Ralph Blane) it should have been better, much better.
Williams herself is captivating, she has a graceful charm and sassiness, while her swimming talent and aquatic skills are enough to make one green with envy. She is well supported by a polished and energetic turn from Vivian Blaine, while Billy Eckstine and Emmett Lynn are suitably sincere and Debbie Reynolds and Bobby Van lighten up the screen and really liven things up.
'Skirts Ahoy!' looks nice enough, the costume and set design are not elaborate or lavish but handsome and colourful enough and the film is photographed very nicely. The songs are all pleasant, though only one is properly memorable and that is the modest hit "What Good is a Girl (Without a Guy"). The way the numbers are staged is energetic and graceful and enthusiastically performed, Williams' water ballet and "Oh By Jingo" performed with terrific gusto by Reynolds and Van.
However, there is no chemistry between Williams and Barry Sullivan. Sullivan further has the indignity of having next to nothing to do and coming over as bland. Joan Evans struggle with the singing and dancing, the inexperience really shows, and also struggles to bring any likable qualities to a character that can border on the desperately annoying.
Despite some nice light, funny and endearingly fluffy moments, too much of the script is soggier than very watery cucumber sandwiches. The story is wafer thin, flimsy doesn't cut it describing the thinness of it, with pacing that really plods in the non-song and dance sequences (where the film comes to life) and an improbable resolution. 'Skirts Ahoy!' further suffers from being overlong, due to too much of its basic narrative content being as thin as it was that was difficult to overlook, and for being over-stuffed in other parts. Direction is indifferent.
Overall, not a bad film but never fully leaves the deck. Most of the cast and some nice moments keep it afloat but the story and script threaten to sink it and almost do. 5/10 Bethany Cox
