Quotes

[on never being invited to Number 10 Downing Street, the Prime Minister's residence] Maybe if I snorted coke and had one hit record I would be invited, but I wouldn't know what to do or say.

[on how to improve the BBC schedule] Merge BBC Four with BBC Two, cut out some of the gardening and the cookery and all that on BBC Two and turn it back into a quality thing that it was meant to be.

The NHS is the only Religion left in Britain.

If Hilary Clinton were a Man, would she have won?

[Question Time] You have the Conch!