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Futuristic story... was kind of exploring my feelings on submission and dominance, and I was kind of surprised how it ended up going.
Category Story / All
Species Unspecified / Any
Gender Any
Size 50 x 50px
File Size 94 kB
Very interesting. I shall have to check out your other stories as time permits.
Wow, I really loved this story. This is the kind of story that really drew me to the fandom in the first place. This story is so well orchestrated I enjoyed every minute.
I thought one of the coolest things you did was the combination of the first person perspective and keeping the character so ambiguous at the same time, not even revealing the fact that he was a collie until the seventh page. Forcing the reader to learn such basic details about the narrator through the voices of others really heightened the feeling of self-discovery he goes through.
The only minor criticism I can think of is the use of quotes from characters without attributing a character who is speaking which, in itself, isn't a bad thing at all, but following it with an action from another character in the same paragraph can be a little confusing.
Anyway, awesome story and when I get some more time I'll definitely check out the rest!
I thought one of the coolest things you did was the combination of the first person perspective and keeping the character so ambiguous at the same time, not even revealing the fact that he was a collie until the seventh page. Forcing the reader to learn such basic details about the narrator through the voices of others really heightened the feeling of self-discovery he goes through.
The only minor criticism I can think of is the use of quotes from characters without attributing a character who is speaking which, in itself, isn't a bad thing at all, but following it with an action from another character in the same paragraph can be a little confusing.
Anyway, awesome story and when I get some more time I'll definitely check out the rest!
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