~Sniper1

Hello fellow furs on FA and friends

I first off want to apologize for having hiatus for not using this website for awhile, because in all honesty I don’t really use this all that often, and I’m usually on Twitter a little more than most social media platforms.

Life for me in the fandom has been up-and-down but I just want to share the down parts of this community lately

Back in 2016 I was criticized alot by a few locals who think I am fake hurtful or completely treating everyone of them like numbers and all I cared about was myself and not them. Well they are Hippocrates because they worship other popular people but they get ignored by them alot and i never did so they were being stupid. They completely tore me apart and I almost threaten to destroy my suit and leave the fandom forever. Also during that time I had a friend who inspired me to the fandom has left the fandom due to the same situations as me, bullying harassment, and Been accused for stealing I even know that was never true. So therefore he got rid of his beautiful suit that he spent a lot of money on and it doesn’t feel the same without him anymore. So after all that has happened it took me a very long time to recover but I was able to get back on my feet this year in 2017. But then things were getting worse again.

I’ve met some new people and very quickly escalated when I did something personal behind one person’s back and he got pretty upset with me and blocked me and he would not listen to me saying sorry or whatever. I don’t really care anymore because sometimes people in this community can hold a grudge for a very long time and they don’t know how to move on in life and make things better for anybody..

Other people I have met for the first time I became pretty close to but then eventually they’ve gotten more friends and they started dating people I feel like I’ve wasted a lot of my time trying to talk with them on social media or even hang out with them in real life because all they do is run around at cons and ignore my messages or even ignore me in person because there something better in front of them or they get dragged away by their mates or friends and I’m left in the corner alone and depressed.

It makes me really mad that I try so hard to be a good friend to everybody and no matter what I’m always going to be thrown away and I don’t think that they want me in their life as an important person.

I’m not saying all this as a cry for attention, I have my brights to explain how I feel and how I wish things in the fandom would be a lot better.

On top of all this crap that has been happening, I have lost a friend that I’ve been very close to for the past three years and he blocked me because of my negativity which you are pretty much reading in my journal right now. That’s only because he has a lot going on in his life and the last thing he needs is to hear me or others bitch about how much their life sucks and he thinks that I never cared about him, when he does, or whatever he’s going through. It was coming out of his ass the whole time because I know that I’ve been negative but he wasn’t really the kind of friend I thought he was.

Another thing I’ve been noticing is that everybody is going after popularity and that’s what’s been pissing me off a lot about this community as well. I’ve been trying to be close to people in my local area but all they care about is clicks and smarter popular people who have the best looking suit, have a lot to give, live up to anyone’s expectations, have the best personality and not really give a fuck about anyone who is far away or don’t live up to their expectations either.

2015 was one of the best years of my life since I joined the fandom and I really thought I have every reason to be happy but wants 2016 came around at all just went downhill from there and I try so hard to keep in touch with friends and try to talk and hang out with them but I feel like most of the time Im the ghost. I just get really sick of wasting my energy keeping in touch with people who I trusted and can’t reply to any messages even though that they have a job where they can actually look at their phone and reply to me but obviously they can’t do that because I am not close to them or I’m not popular enough for them to have a conversation with. Especially if I'm not sexual enough to be trusted seeing their AD accounts on twitter and all that bullshit.

All I did for the past three years is been myself and apparently been myself isn’t good enough for anybody I hang out with or talk to. Everybody in this community has a lot of expectations and I’m really Tired of being singled out or having some being skeptical with me because of the past mistakes I have made. Nobody can ever let go of a grudge and forget about the past and be friends with me like things have never happened.

So for right now I have decided to maybe take a breaks because I will be hopefully getting a job, get a new car, hopefully begin my life properly without any distractions within the furry fandom.

Because my depression and anxiety levels have been crazy because of all my energy I put into this community and I feel like it needs to be eased up if I take a break for a little while.

Even though I have Sniper 2.0 that i got this March I will not sell it or anything, I will hopefully sometime go to a con with my new head and present it to all of you in the future. I don’t wish to have any conflicts with anyone who is reading this because this is honestly how I’ve been feeling for a very long time. And if there’s anyone out there who finds this disgusting and rude I apologize but this is my honest truth.

But I do thank you so much for any of you who have been very supportive and been keeping in touch with me and hang out with me at fur meets and cons for the last three years and I will never forget that!

I need to spread my wings and fly and cut ties with people who don’t wanna talk to me or hang out with me anymore especially the ones who have given me shit back in 2016 and 2017 cause of mistakes i have made. I need a new beginning of my life to make myself happy and not waste my time and energy keeping in touch with people who I thought were my friends. I wish them luck if they don’t want to talk to me anymore or be friends with me because that is their loss.

So I wish you guys the best for now and I happy holiday and new year to each and everyone of you and if you want to stay updated it’s OK to follow me on Twitter but I won’t be using this website much or be as active on other social media sites. So thank you all for reading this and I will return with a bigger smile, a positive attitude, and hopefully better friends in this community someday.