~BMWu

 SlickDratini is presenting a series of stories that are a part of these Comm-Ready Prompts that anyone can participate if they have the money for it. For more info, click here for all the details. I'd also recommend reaching out to SlickDratini if you have any questions or concerns.

 pikachert is hosting a raffle. Read the rules if interested

Hello everyone,

Been a LONG time since I've made a journal and figured I make another one to just let you all know that I'm doing good and all that. Managed to get back into working and racking up the money so hopefully I can get some commissions going.

The real reason for the journal though is a situation I've been dealing with being the FA notes systems. Ever since I sent my last FA notes about a year ago, I have been unable to send and reply to notes to others. Even though I sent a ticket to the Admins discussing the situation, it has been about seven months since they've last responded and nothing has changed since then.

So until the FA notes has been fixed, I've decided to use my discord to send and respond to notes in order to stay in touch with others especially artists that I may commission one day. Keep in mind that I may not respond to all if it's just a simple hello and/or a RP request since life has made my days busier than normal, but should u want to discuss other topics besides that, send an FA note with your full discord username (including the last 4 numbers) with that u want to ask. Even though I can't send/reply to notes, I can still see them come in so that I can add it to the discord friend list. I hope that the notes system is fixed so I don't have to keep doing this forever, but till then, this will be the best way for me to respond to others.

Hope you all have a great day~

Ms.Sunrise hosting a free raffle: https://www.furaffinity.net/view/53920651/

Join if you're interested

 Ms.Sunrise is hosting an art raffle here

 impfangs is hosting a free, watcher raffle! Be sure to read the description for details

If anyone is interested, click the link: http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/9375147/

If anyone is interested, click the link: https://www.furaffinity.net/journal/9138204/

Today is my Birthday. Just figured I get that out there.

Click the Link if interested: https://www.furaffinity.net/view/30828255/

Impfangs is doing a 500 watcher giveaway with free art for up to three characters.

Link: http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/9064719/

Is it bad to ask for free art? Is it bad to desperately want free art even if it's just for one pic? How far would someone go if they want free art so badly

The reason why I ask this is because for some reason I'm seeing a hell lot more collabs and free gifts than usual. Maybe it just me, but everywhere I look there's seems to be less commissions, but more gifts and collabs. Perhaps it just an easier way to pay for what you want rather than pay full price for it, maybe the artist and customers are on such good terms that they can work out a deal, Or maybe it's just two people showing their love or friendship or whatever. Another reason I ask this is because I noticed someone say something that I hadn't thought about till now. It was browsing through user-pages one day (Not naming them) and there was a conservation between two people where the artist was possibly going to do a free pic for the watcher as thanks for support and such. Now the thing about the artist was that he not only does random gifts and makes it a point to not be asked about it, but he also does collabs/trades with only people and friends that he trusts and admires. How can you do collabs/trades with only people and friends that you trust and admire, but throw out random gifts? Anyway, the watcher declined the offer saying "There is a lot of people out there who try to leech free art off of others and I don't like feeling like one" and that makes me rethink about the community.

Now I can understand collabs since they probably talked to over and discuss prices, chars, etc... but there are times where I just see these "random gifts" and it makes me wonder whether random gifts are a good thing or not. If it was like a birthday gift, special occasions, etc... then I can understand, but when people just pile on random gifts day after day and the gifts seem to go to just one people, it makes me wonder if one would call that an "obsession" rather than just pure randomness; especially when the artist does it for one person over... and over... and over.

For me, I have been fortunate enough to won a few raffles and get a few artists to do a free commission thanks to friends and I've even draw pics for someone's birthday. In addition, there are times where I would like to get free art every now and then, but I'm not the type of person that is just desperate enough to make getting free art 24/7 an obsession. However, is it bad that I want free art? Would someone see that as an obsession?

At the end of the day, whether I see an artist just make random gifts, but they seem to be for one particular person. I feel angry at the artist, but jealous and envious at the recipient UNLESS there's a reason behind it all. To me, if I was gonna make random gifts, I would randomly pick either a watcher or artist and then make the pic after talking it over with them; through at this point it sounds more like a raffle at this point.

Lastly, if anyone even bothers to read this journal or any of my journals for that matter (which you all don't), please don't start any drama.

Here is a mix of artists who created their art or have a vast collection produced by other artists that I hate to say... I'm completely envious of...

 1234567810
 2ndVenus
 Akaikosh
 AlphaLinda
 ASaneMan
 Booshie
 Christykitsune
 Cownugget
 DatBlangry
 Derilect
 diorexity
 Dragga
 dragonis1
 DragonX1010
 drpolice
 Dr_deadman
 Dweet-Tea
 EyeofCalamity
 FeralSlash
 FidchellVore
 FluffyLatios
 ForcesWerwolf
 Generationslayer
 Glitch
 Gramzon_the_Dragon
 GrumpMonster
 Heartman98
 htfcuddles
 HungotheNomster
 igglypou
Jeff_Dragon471
Kalnareff
Kanevex
Kiala_Tiagra
livinlovindude
Liz_Art
MakotoMew
MegaNovaV1
Memento~Mori
Mewtwo
Noelram
NummyNumz
OneMoreDragon
pingthehungryfox
Pippuri
poojawa
Pywen
R-MK
Radarn
reporterr
samagthraV2
SentinelWinder
Servo117
Shyguy9
Silenrea
Smuxray
SolidScale
SPARKYxTHExWOLF
Spazman
StarstrikeX
StormyRange
Talonblaze
Taluthus
Tero-dragon
TheTWFZ
Thoshan
Umiriko
ViewtifulFennec
Vodcat
voregence
VoreLord
Vorist
VVITch
Wouhlven
WPBcrazy
YokoMasho
Yui-hii
yukinarisasaki
ZacktheRiolu

That I'm still here. Been handling problems with the family and other RL situations.

I'm starting to have doubts whether or not I consider myself a "good" or even "decent" artist. Even though I haven't post any art for the past few months, I have been trying to improve my drawing skills; especially since I only have a mouse to "draw" with (Though I might get a graphics tablet sooner or later). For some reason however, no matter how much effort and time I put into my work, it never feels like I've improved at all.

So, I've been watching a number of "drawing" streams (or whatever people call them) to see if I can learn anything new, get some tips, etc... and it feels like there's no way people get better simply from hours and hours of drawing. It feels like drawing is more of a "talent" or "gift" than something anyone can do just by doing it. I've been trying to improve my drawing skill for a number of years, but it feels like my art fails in comparison to others.

I don't know if it's something that takes an incredibly long time to master or something you have to be born with, but after watching the stream, I'm pretty much jealous of every artist whose artwork is just magnificent.

I'm not sure if I'll take a permanent leave cause of this, but I'm feeling defeated and very depressed to the point that I may never recover.

Click the link and read the description if interested: https://www.furaffinity.net/journal/8577190/

And may the new year be just a wonderful as the last! :)

In case people were wondering. Just been dealing with a number of things in RL, but I'm slowly working on getting back into drawing

I'm still here... just been debating a lot on whether or not I'm gonna leave or not.

I feel like I'm not getting anywhere here cause it feels like there's just too much competition. It feels like no matter how much I'll try to put in, there's always people that are always gonna stand out and be recognized, commissioned, etc...

On top of that, I'm still unable to get a job or make any money. I even have less free time than before and it's affecting me mentally and physically.

All-in-all, It feels like my life is just slowly slipping away and either people are gonna notice, ignore me, or accuse me for guilt-tripping.

Perhaps I have to accept the fact that I'm never gonna get to that level where people will want to commission me or include me in their pics.

I not gonna say names, but I'm just flat-out jealous of so many people that just appear so much when I browse FA, whether it just the artist themselves of the characters that are just too popular for me to contend with. They just seem to have the time, money, and skill to produce their drawings while I'm continuously struggling with all of these.

I'm just fed up with all of it and I don't know how much I can take...

My dog passed away...

And now I feel fucking dead on the inside.

I don't know if I'll be able to recover from this, but I might just flat out leave permanently

I'm losing friends both online and IRL...

My drawing skills aren't improving..

I'm losing so much interest in drawing as well...

And I'm about to lose my dog.

I'm just done and leaving for good soon...

I just found out our dog has kidney failure and there's only so much we can do.

Fuck me and my life....

I now have a discord account. Here's my tag if anyone is interested: BMWu#0572

I don't really know why I make these journals when no one or only a few people actually take the time t read them, but I'm doing it anyway.

I had said earlier that I would be out on a cross-country trip, but that got delayed due to health problems. How that its sorted out, the family is planning on attempting our cross-country trip again.

I also have a few goals in mind that I hope I can get help or advice on.

1. Twitch/YouTube
I wanna get into streaming as well as setting up a YouTube account and at the same time, I wanna "decorate" it per-se. If there's anyone willing to do it or can recommend an artist for a cheap price, I'd real;y appreciate it.

2. Prices
Oddly enough, I'm having a problem figuring a good price for commissions and requests since I'm slowly getting back into drawing. If anyone can recommend a reasonable price, I'd appreciate it.

3. drawings
I'll be taking most of the time updating my OCs since I never had a chance to develop their back-stories and making them more "unique" to me. I'll probably have a few Pokemon OCs, but I might make different ones too.

Anyhow, that about it. Hope everyone's having a good summer

I've finally finished with college and gonna be out on a cross-country trip so responses might be severely delayed.

Sadly, I'm still annoyed and jealous of the fact that I've been unable to make any money for commissions due to the fact that there's too much demand and that they cost a lot. I know it's because they make a living and all, but still... They cost a lot. And all the popular people seem to be "hogging all the fun" With all the money they have to spend. Sounds stupid to say, but that's how I deal.

Hopefully, I can get back to drawing and make some money. Otherwise I'm gonna be more depressed that I ever was...

It's my OCs dying, regardless of the RP.

It may not sound and look like much to others, but I hate it when other people RP and try to kill them. It makes me fucking angry and upset when people try to kill the OCs I put effort into making.

Unless we come to an agreement, if I never see anyone trying to kill my OCs in RPs, I'll just block you permanently regardless of the situation.

Seems harsh, but that's how it's gonna be.