The Velvet Rage
Overcoming the Pain of Growing Up Gay in a Straight Man's World
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Narrado por:
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Alan Downs Ph. D
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De:
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Alan Downs Ph. D
Acerca de esta escucha
The most important issue in a gay man’s life is not “coming out”, but coming to terms with the invalidating past. Despite the progress made in recent years, many gay men still wonder, “Are we better off?” The byproduct of growing up gay in a straight world continues to be the internalization of shame, rejection, and anger - a toxic cocktail that can lead to drug abuse, promiscuity, alcoholism, depression, and suicide.
Drawing on contemporary psychological research, the author’s own journey, and the stories of many of his friends and clients, Velvet Rage addresses the myth of gay pride and outlines three stages to emotional well-being for gay men. The revised and expanded edition covers issues related to gay marriage, a broader range of examples that extend beyond middle-class gay men in America, and expansion of the original discussion on living authentically as a gay man.
©2005, 2006, 2012 Alan Downs (P)2012 HighBridge CompanyLos oyentes también disfrutaron...
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Are you ready to make changes in your life - but feel something is holding you back? Is your soul asking you to take a leap - but you’re too afraid to take it? Are you ready for something new - but aren’t sure where to start? If this sounds like you, this audiobook will give you the courage and faith you need to jump across the threshold from where you are - to where you want to be. Jump...and Your Life Will Appear is a step-by-step guide to clearing the path ahead so you can let go and make the change you need the most.
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Inspiring and motivating!
- De Debra Goro en 08-06-18
De: Nancy Levin
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Bonds That Make Us Free
- Healing Our Relationships, Coming to Ourselves
- De: C. Terry Warner
- Narrado por: C. Terry Warner
- Duración: 10 h y 5 m
- Versión completa
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Bonds That Make Us Free is a groundbreaking book that suggests the remedy for our troubling emotions by addressing their root causes. You'll learn how, in ways we scarcely suspect, we are responsible for feelings like anger, envy, and insecurity that we have blamed on others. Even though we fear to admit this, it is good news. If we produce these emotions, it falls within our power to stop them. But we have to understand our part in them far better than we do, and that is what this remarkable book teaches.
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Helped save our marriage.
- De Kevin Gray en 02-15-19
De: C. Terry Warner
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Love Is a Choice
- The Definitive Book on Letting Go of Unhealthy Relationships
- De: Dr. Robert Hemfelt, Dr. Frank Minirth, Dr. Paul Meier
- Narrado por: Christopher Solimene
- Duración: 11 h y 20 m
- Versión completa
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In Love Is a Choice, best-selling doctors Robert Hemfelt, Frank Minirth, and Paul Meier walk you through their 10 proven stages to recovery from codependency that results from external circumstances. Humans are susceptible to codependency because of our sinful tendency to use defense mechanisms to fool ourselves. In codependent relationships, deceitful games are played, and important Christian principles are often taken out of context and abused.
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Great book, horrible Performance
- De Jeff en 03-15-18
De: Dr. Robert Hemfelt, y otros
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10 Conversations You Need to Have with Yourself
- A Powerful Plan for Spiritual Growth and Self-Improvement
- De: Shmuley Boteach
- Narrado por: Shmuley Boteach
- Duración: 6 h y 23 m
- Versión completa
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Some of the most effective talk therapy is self-talk therapy - learning to connect positively with that internal voice that serves as your own personal GPS to guide you through life. Rabbi Shmuley teaches the reader to reconnect with the inner voice of conscience, the source of personal dreams and values, which has been so drowned out by the noise of a culture that emphasizes form over substance, career over calling, and consumption over conviction. Drawing on Rabbi Shmuley's extensive counseling experience, this book helps you defeat negative self-talk.
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Grateful for inspiration, guidance and humility
- De Mike en 07-27-15
De: Shmuley Boteach
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10 Stupid Things Couples Do To Mess Up Their Relationships
- De: Dr. Laura Schlessinger
- Narrado por: Dr. Laura Schlessinger
- Duración: 2 h y 37 m
- Versión resumida
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In Ten Stupid Things Couples Do to Mess Up Their Relationships, Dr. Laura Schlessinger calls for a return to traditional courtship. Courtship allows couples and their families to get acquainted with each other over a longer period of time, and provides structure and guidelines for that important process.
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No brainer ideas that we can forget
- De Ali0531 en 07-06-15
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Coming Apart
- De: Daphne Rose Kingma, Katherine Woodward Thomas - foreword
- Narrado por: Ann Richardson
- Duración: 6 h y 8 m
- Versión completa
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Next to the death of a loved one, the ending of a relationship is the most painful experience most people will ever go through. Coming Apart is a first aid kit for getting through the ending. It is a tool that will enable you to live through the end of your relationship with your self-esteem intact.
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Title does not reflect the content
- De NeVi en 04-25-21
De: Daphne Rose Kingma, y otros
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The Dreamer and the Fantasy Relationship
- De: Natalie Lue
- Narrado por: Lucy Price-Lewis
- Duración: 7 h y 4 m
- Versión completa
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Most people, if asked, would deny that they'd ever had fantasy relationships, as they are associated with pretending to be with someone or in something that's nonexistent. However, it's time for you to change what you think you know. In this modern age of texts, email, Facebook, online dating, and casual relationships, it's never been so easy to find yourself in a crumb-filled fantasy relationship.
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Just ok...
- De LaKita en 09-13-17
De: Natalie Lue
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Relationship Breakthrough
- How to Create Outstanding Relationships in Every Area of Your Life
- De: Cloe Madanes, Anthony Robbins
- Narrado por: Aimee Jolson
- Duración: 6 h y 32 m
- Versión completa
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Everyone faces the challenges of making relationships work. Whether with spouses, family members, friends, lovers, or colleagues, relationships have the power to make one feel happy, frustrated, or miserable. In Relationship Breakthrough, Cloe Madanes - an expert in creating healing, empowering relationships - gives listeners vital tools to transform their relationships and their lives. Madanes's cutting-edge methods produce real results and create rewarding, sustainable relationships.
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Disappointed
- De Dee en 01-10-16
De: Cloe Madanes, y otros
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Frientimacy
- How to Deepen Friendships for Lifelong Health and Happiness
- De: Shasta Nelson
- Narrado por: Robin Eller
- Duración: 8 h y 31 m
- Versión completa
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In Frientimacy, award-winning speaker Shasta Nelson shows how anyone can form stronger, more meaningful friendships, marked by a level of trust she calls "frientimacy". Shasta explores the most common complaints and conflicts facing female friendships today, and lays out strategies for overcoming these pitfalls to create deeper, supportive relationships that last for the long-term.
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I didn't finish it, but I still recommend it
- De Emily en 10-21-17
De: Shasta Nelson
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Turn Your Mate into Your Soulmate
- A Practical Guide to Happily Ever After
- De: Arielle Ford
- Narrado por: Karen White
- Duración: 6 h y 33 m
- Versión completa
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Internationally best-selling author and relationship expert Arielle Ford offers the keys to rediscovering love, passion, respect, and renewed commitment years after the simple act of falling in love and getting married. It's one thing to fall in love and get married. It is quite another thing to have a marriage you love. This is the true purpose of Turn Your Mate into Your Soulmate.
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SO Hard To Listen To!
- De froglover en 12-03-16
De: Arielle Ford
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Loving People
- How to Love and Be Loved
- De: John Townsend
- Narrado por: Matthew Josdal
- Duración: 7 h y 34 m
- Versión completa
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Best-selling author Dr. John Townsend teaches you that love can actually be learned and gives you the steps and tools to become skilled in love. Using his trademark stories to flesh out the important principles, Dr. Townsend covers receiving love, connecting love, healing love, confronting love, romantic love, and surrendering love. Through his teaching, listeners will discover - and start enjoying - the words, actions, and experiences of authentic love.
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Very insightful
- De Amazon Customer en 05-17-19
De: John Townsend
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The Verbally Abusive Man, Can He Change?
- A Woman's Guide to Deciding Whether to Stay or Go
- De: Patricia Evans
- Narrado por: Laural Merlington
- Duración: 7 h y 20 m
- Versión completa
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Coupling stories of abused women and abusive men from her own case studies, Patricia Evans here gives you the tools you need to transform your relationship. Most important, she assures you that such a transformation is possible—given the right circumstances. Evans also helps you determine if your abuser really has changed—or if he’s merely creating the illusion of change. And if he hasn’t changed, Evans helps you decide whether it’s time to leave the relationship—and what to do when it is.
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A gift to the emotionally violated
- De curious23m en 08-16-15
De: Patricia Evans
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A sex and relationship columnist bares it all in a series of essays—part memoir, part manifesto—that explore the author’s coming of age and coming out as a bisexual man and move toward embracing and celebrating sex unencumbered by shame.
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Great insight and information. Vain human.
- De Lauren B. en 07-27-23
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For decades, the specter of homosexuality haunted Washington. The mere suggestion that a person might be gay destroyed reputations, ended careers, and ruined lives. At the height of the Cold War, fear of homosexuality became intertwined with the growing threat of international communism, leading to a purge of gay men and lesbians from the federal government. In the fevered atmosphere of political Washington, the secret “too loathsome to mention” held enormous, terrifying power.
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Exhausting snd enraging and disappointing
- De Frequent shopper! en 07-16-22
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Gender Euphoria
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So often the stories shared by trans people about their transition center on gender dysphoria: a feeling of deep discomfort with their birth-assigned gender, and a powerful catalyst for coming out or transitioning. But for many non-cisgender people, it's gender euphoria that pushes forward their transition: the joy the first time a parent calls them by their new chosen name, the first time they have the confidence to cut their hair short, the first time they truly embrace themself.
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simply life changing
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Tales of the City
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For almost four decades Armistead Maupin's Tales of the City has blazed its own trail through popular culture - from a groundbreaking newspaper serial to a classic novel, to a television event that entranced millions around the world. The first of nine novels about the denizens of the mythic apartment house at 28 Barbary Lane, Tales is both a sparkling comedy of manners and an indelible portrait of an era that changed forever the way we live.
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a collection of abridged books
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The Deviant's War
- The Homosexual vs. the United States of America
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In 1957, Frank Kameny, a rising astronomer working for the US Military in Hawaii, received a summons to report immediately to Washington, DC. The Pentagon had reason to believe he was a homosexual, and after a series of humiliating interviews, Kameny - like gay men and women for generations - was promptly dismissed from the military. Unlike many others, though, Kameny fought back.
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Big Surprise
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The Book of Pride
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The Book of Pride captures the true story of the gay rights movement from the 1960s to the present, through richly detailed, stunning interviews with the leaders, activists, and ordinary people who witnessed the movement and made it happen. These individuals fought battles both personal and political, often without the support of family or friends, frequently under the threat of violence and persecution.
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Pure Joy for EVERYONE
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Boyslut
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A sex and relationship columnist bares it all in a series of essays—part memoir, part manifesto—that explore the author’s coming of age and coming out as a bisexual man and move toward embracing and celebrating sex unencumbered by shame.
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Great insight and information. Vain human.
- De Lauren B. en 07-27-23
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Secret City
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For decades, the specter of homosexuality haunted Washington. The mere suggestion that a person might be gay destroyed reputations, ended careers, and ruined lives. At the height of the Cold War, fear of homosexuality became intertwined with the growing threat of international communism, leading to a purge of gay men and lesbians from the federal government. In the fevered atmosphere of political Washington, the secret “too loathsome to mention” held enormous, terrifying power.
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Exhausting snd enraging and disappointing
- De Frequent shopper! en 07-16-22
De: James Kirchick
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Gender Euphoria
- Stories of Joy from Trans, Non-Binary and Intersex Writers
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So often the stories shared by trans people about their transition center on gender dysphoria: a feeling of deep discomfort with their birth-assigned gender, and a powerful catalyst for coming out or transitioning. But for many non-cisgender people, it's gender euphoria that pushes forward their transition: the joy the first time a parent calls them by their new chosen name, the first time they have the confidence to cut their hair short, the first time they truly embrace themself.
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simply life changing
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Tales of the City
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For almost four decades Armistead Maupin's Tales of the City has blazed its own trail through popular culture - from a groundbreaking newspaper serial to a classic novel, to a television event that entranced millions around the world. The first of nine novels about the denizens of the mythic apartment house at 28 Barbary Lane, Tales is both a sparkling comedy of manners and an indelible portrait of an era that changed forever the way we live.
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a collection of abridged books
- De Dan en 02-16-07
De: Armistead Maupin
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The Deviant's War
- The Homosexual vs. the United States of America
- De: Eric Cervini
- Narrado por: Vikas Adam
- Duración: 15 h y 34 m
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In 1957, Frank Kameny, a rising astronomer working for the US Military in Hawaii, received a summons to report immediately to Washington, DC. The Pentagon had reason to believe he was a homosexual, and after a series of humiliating interviews, Kameny - like gay men and women for generations - was promptly dismissed from the military. Unlike many others, though, Kameny fought back.
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Big Surprise
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The Book of Pride
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The Book of Pride captures the true story of the gay rights movement from the 1960s to the present, through richly detailed, stunning interviews with the leaders, activists, and ordinary people who witnessed the movement and made it happen. These individuals fought battles both personal and political, often without the support of family or friends, frequently under the threat of violence and persecution.
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Boy from the Valleys
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In this intimate memoir, Luke takes us behind the scenes of his career on the stage and screen. He writes beautifully of the relationship he now has with his family and the respect they all have for one another on their different paths. Luke's story is a powerful tale of resilience, courage, and the pursuit of finding a sense of belonging and identity, but mostly (and hopefully) a story of inspiration.
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There is always hope
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Unruly Desires
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In its voracious hunger to fill its decks and spars with the bodies of strong young sailors, the nineteenth century US Navy and the commercial maritime industry welcomed eccentrics, criminals, outcasts, and misfits into a community of the marginalized, one that held very different values and expectations than the towns and villages from which the young men fled, a community that offered a tentative refuge to men who were sexually attracted to other men. Benemann provides an in-depth examination of nineteenth century LGBTQ culture as it developed at sea and in America's port cities.
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Hidden treasure!
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Get Closer: A Gay Men's Guide to Intimacy and Relationships, 3rd Edition
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Each relationship is as unique as you are. Rather than rely on a one-size-fits-all approach to relationship success, Jeffrey Chernin, PhD, will help you to be in a long-term, intimate relationship. This warm and compassionate guide helps you answer the following questions: How can I build a long-lasting partnership? Why am I afraid to get close to someone? How can I open myself to deeper, more intimate communication? What can I do to put an end to ongoing fights and stalemates with my partner? With over 25 years of experience, Dr. Chernin focuses on how to be more satisfied in your current ...
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Miss Memory Lane
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In 2018, Colton Haynes woke up in a hospital. He’d had two seizures, lost vision in one eye, almost ruptured a kidney, and been put on an involuntary psychiatric hold. Not yet thirty, he knew he had to take stock of his life and make some serious changes if he wanted to see his next birthday. As he worked towards sobriety, Haynes allowed himself to become vulnerable for the first time and discovered profound self-awareness. He had millions of social media followers who constantly told him they loved him.
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Amazing Story and Young Man
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F*ckboys Are Boring
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In this salacious, vulnerable, heartbreaking, and hilarious guide to surviving the digital hellscape that is modern dating, model and eating disorder activist Ryan Sheldon offers a path to healing while looking for real love. Ryan unapologetically shares it all (even the cringeworthy) about his escapades as a gay man looking for romance in a sea of f--kboys. F*ckboys Are Boring is a guidebook for anyone who has struggled with feeling inferior, unworthy, or less-than while looking for connection in this disconnected world.
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Touching, funny, and so helpful
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An African American and Latinx History of the United States
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Spanning more than 200 years, An African American and Latinx History of the United States is a revolutionary, politically charged narrative history arguing that the "Global South" was crucial to the development of America as we know it. Ortiz challenges the notion of westward progress, and shows how placing African American, Latinx, and Indigenous voices unapologetically front and center transforms American history into the story of the working class organizing against imperialism.
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I had to return
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Dancer from the Dance
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Now in audio for the first time! Award-winning actor and two-time Tony Award nominee David Pittu narrates one of the most influential books in gay literature. Andrew Holleran's Dancer from the Dance defined gay life in late 1970s New York. Published in 1978, the novel captures the time post-Stonewall and pre-AIDS where sexual freedom was celebrated and the future appeared limitless.
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Excellent
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Tomorrow Will Be Different
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Before she became the first transgender person to speak at a national political convention in 2016 at the age of twenty-six, Sarah McBride struggled with the decision to come out—not just to her family but to the students of American University, where she was serving as student body president. She’d known she was a girl from her earliest memories, but it wasn’t until the Facebook post announcing her truth went viral that she realized just how much impact her story could have on the country.
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Amazing Trans story
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Call Me by Your Name
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Call Me by Your Name first swept across the world in 2007. It is the story of a sudden and powerful romance that blossoms between an adolescent boy and a summer guest at his parents' cliffside mansion on the Italian Riviera. During the restless summer weeks, unrelenting but buried currents of obsession, fascination, and desire intensify their passion as they test the charged ground between them and verge toward the one thing both already fear they may never truly find again: total intimacy.
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Amazing.
- De Nico L. en 10-07-17
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Swimming in the Dark
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Set in early 1980s Poland against the violent decline of communism, a tender and passionate story of first love between two young men who eventually find themselves on opposite sides of the political divide - a stunningly poetic and heartrending literary debut for fans of Andre Aciman, Garth Greenwell, and Alan Hollinghurst.
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One of the Best Contemporary Novels Ever
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Out in the Open
- Browerton University, Book 1
- De: A.J. Truman
- Narrado por: Alexander Cendese
- Duración: 5 h y 50 m
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College sophomore Ethan Follett never says what's on his mind and never wants to rock the boat. Out in the open, things couldn't be better, but secretly Ethan yearns for some real excitement in his life. He finds it in cocky frat boy Greg Sanderson, who challenges every rigid, preconceived notion Ethan lives by. Soon, their sparring relationship turns sexual, and these enemies-with-benefits "get their freak on" all over campus. Yet the more Ethan comes out of his shell, the more Greg retreats into his, working overtime to keep his ladies' man public persona intact.
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A Relatable Read for the College-Age Gay Man
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Reading the Signs
- De: Keira Andrews
- Narrado por: Greg Boudreaux
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At 34, veteran catcher Jake just wants to finish out his contract and retire. His team doesn't have a prayer of making the playoffs, but who needs the stress anyway? Jake lost his passion for the game - and life - after driving away the man he loved. He swore he'll never risk his heart again. Then he's traded to a team that wants a vet behind the plate to tame their new star pitcher. Jake is shocked to find the gangly kid he once knew has grown into a gorgeous young man.
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Excellent sports romance
- De Zell Oakley en 07-22-20
De: Keira Andrews
Lo que los oyentes dicen sobre The Velvet Rage
Calificaciones medias de los clientesReseñas - Selecciona las pestañas a continuación para cambiar el origen de las reseñas.
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- avery
- 09-05-16
Amazing
This book finally provided me answers to questions I have been asking over a lifetime.
A
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- Dan
- 04-10-17
Life changing
Honestly helped me really cope with my sexuality and improve the relationships in my life.
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- Amazon Customer
- 04-04-19
Powerful...Enlightening...Inspiring
This book was truly amazing! A must read for all who seek truth and purpose
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- Robert in SC
- 07-01-20
Great book.
I’d been told about this book and am thankful I’m going through it. It’s written specifically for gay men. It’s an eye awakening self improvement book by a gay psychotherapist. He covers what he calls the different phases we all go through to hopefully become a healthy authentic man in healthy authentic relationships. It is definitely worth while. I’d definitely encourage others to read or listen as I am.
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- Sasha
- 06-16-20
A Must Read For Every Gay Male!
Life changing, a book that must be read by every gay man upon coming out - this book will give you self insight like nothing ever will.
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- B. Vanderbilt
- 03-27-22
Wonderful Material, Boring Narration
I found the information in Alan Downs’s The Velvet Rage very interesting. And much of what he described about growing up gay in a homophobic society resonated with my own experience. Unfortunately, Downs fell victim to that temptation most sensible authors resist: narrating his own book. Dreadful idea. The author’s relentless monotone made for a rather soporific listen, despite the great content.
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- TheFitnessPenguin
- 05-22-22
Each chapter gets better and more relatable.
When my psychiatrist recommended this book, the title made me roll my eyes as i thought, this is going to be the gayest book i have ever read. I had another book, The Body Keeps Score, to complete before i was going to start this one and i could not have been happier i didnt read them in the opposite order. TBKS was a tough, clinical and emotionally heavy behemoth and i was i need of something relevant and engaging to read next to help balance my mind.
The first few chapters seemed to include descriptions of sex that almost seemed like they were attempting to be erotic instead of informative and i was immediately worried about my mom and sister who were planning to read TVR as well. They ares very liberal but they get awkward at overtly gay sex talk and i didnt want them to have that affecting what they took away from the book. Thankfully the sex talk faded out of focus and what was left was a great balance of clinical information with proven results told through people who all seemed to be just like me in some ways. I am going to re-listen to this again with my husband to see what he takes away from it!
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- Drummond Culture
- 03-29-17
A Full Understanding of My Gay Self
Alan Downs did something that I didn't think was possible in this book. He broke down the struggles of being a gay person in this world and gave us some steps for making the most of the life we have left on this world. If I could I would buy this book for every single gay person on this planet because I believe our community needs this book and all it's advice more than ever right now. It's sad to think there are gays out there that may never hear this wisdom that Alan Downs speaks in this book. I for one will do my best to spread this knowledge as far and wide as I can. Being a YouTuber and public figure myself I plan on telling people about this book as often as I possibly can. He literally answered some of the questions I had no idea how to ask to get the answers.
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- Emily
- 09-17-18
very knowledgeable-
this is a great book for parents of a gay child to read. I feel so much more knowledgeable now.v
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- Ross
- 02-23-23
Deep, helpful, healing and life-changing
I have read the book and listened to the audiobook of The Velvet Rage quite a few times over the years.
There is so much in this book and it is so deep that different aspects become more available and understandable at different stages of life.
I found the Dialectical Behavioural Therapy (DBT) sections extremely helpful and practical.
Very grateful that I found this book. Thank you so much to the Author.
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