It's Not Me, It's You
Break the Blame Cycle. Relationship Better.
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Narrado por:
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John Kim
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Vanessa Bennett
Acerca de esta escucha
Two therapists analyze their own relationship to help untangle the common and frustrating barriers many individuals face on the road to a happy, loving, rewarding partnership.
Many of the clients who end up in our respective therapist offices thought they were doing relationships right—avoiding the white picket fence, focusing on careers and experiences over babies and legally-binding documents, choosing someone after they “found themselves” first. However, like clockwork, around their early to mid-thirties, these clients show up at our door. Why? For the first time, they realize that they dislike their relationship and are frustrated by their partner but know that another break-up won’t fix things. They recognize a pattern of relationship misery that has them finally looking in the mirror asking, how do you make a relationship last?
It took us many relationships, our own inner self journey (which we’re still on), therapy, therapy school, and helping thousands of people with their relationships, to learn to have better ones ourselves. Vanessa woke up at 31, after ending an engagement and moving to Los Angeles. John thought he woke up at 35 after his divorce. But he didn’t truly wake up until he was pushing 40.
In It’s Not Me, It’s You, John and Vanessa dissect their own relationship to help readers figure out theirs: what their relationships were like in the past, what traumas they carried into the new relationship, and how they work on growing together to foster a healthy and long-term bond.
The surprising truth is falling in love is more about you than your partner. It’s more about challenge and growth than comfort and ease, and roots don’t grow from wishful thinking—they grow in the soil of communication, curiosity, patience, and understanding.
It’s Not Me, It’s You is for anyone looking for real advice on relationships that takes both sides into account and discusses relationships with the honesty and clarity we all need.
Supplemental enhancement PDF accompanies the audiobook.
PLEASE NOTE: When you purchase this title, the accompanying PDF will be available in your Audible Library along with the audio.
©2022 John Kim, Vanessa Bennett (P)2022 HarperCollins PublishersLos oyentes también disfrutaron...
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Are you ready to make changes in your life - but feel something is holding you back? Is your soul asking you to take a leap - but you’re too afraid to take it? Are you ready for something new - but aren’t sure where to start? If this sounds like you, this audiobook will give you the courage and faith you need to jump across the threshold from where you are - to where you want to be. Jump...and Your Life Will Appear is a step-by-step guide to clearing the path ahead so you can let go and make the change you need the most.
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Inspiring and motivating!
- De Debra Goro en 08-06-18
De: Nancy Levin
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The Courage Habit
- How to Accept Your Fears, Release the Past, and Live Your Courageous Life
- De: Kate Swoboda, Bari Tessler MA
- Narrado por: Kate Marcin
- Duración: 5 h y 27 m
- Versión completa
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In The Courage Habit, certified life coach Kate Swoboda offers freedom from the outdated belief that one must be fearless in order to live courageously. Instead, she defines courage as a willingness to act on what we want in spite of our fears and offers an evidence-based program to help readers conquer their inner critic, overcome worries, increase resilience, work toward their highest aspirations, and make courage a habit every day.
De: Kate Swoboda, y otros
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Parenting with Presence
- Practices for Raising Conscious, Confident, Caring Kids
- De: Susan Stiffelman
- Narrado por: Polly Stone
- Duración: 8 h y 9 m
- Versión completa
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Our children can be our greatest teachers. Parenting expert Susan Stiffelman writes that the very behaviors that push our buttons - refusing to cooperate or ignoring our requests - can help us build awareness and shed old patterns, allowing us to raise our children with greater ease and enjoyment.
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fantastic
- De Sarah Prentice en 06-26-16
De: Susan Stiffelman
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Us
- Getting Past You & Me to Build a More Loving Relationship
- De: Terrence Real
- Narrado por: Terrence Real, Bruce Springsteen
- Duración: 10 h y 11 m
- Versión completa
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At a time when toxic individualism is rending our society at every level, bestselling author and renowned marriage counselor Terrence Real sees how it poisons intimate relationships in his therapy practice, where he works with couples on the brink of disaster. The good news: Warmer, closer, more passionate relationships are possible if you have the right tools. In his transformative new book Us, Real brilliantly observes how our winner-takes-all culture infiltrates families with devastating results.
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I preferred Fierce Intimacy
- De Jose en 06-23-22
De: Terrence Real
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Loving People
- How to Love and Be Loved
- De: John Townsend
- Narrado por: Matthew Josdal
- Duración: 7 h y 34 m
- Versión completa
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Best-selling author Dr. John Townsend teaches you that love can actually be learned and gives you the steps and tools to become skilled in love. Using his trademark stories to flesh out the important principles, Dr. Townsend covers receiving love, connecting love, healing love, confronting love, romantic love, and surrendering love. Through his teaching, listeners will discover - and start enjoying - the words, actions, and experiences of authentic love.
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Very insightful
- De Amazon Customer en 05-17-19
De: John Townsend
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Bad Advice
- How to Survive and Thrive in an Age of Bullshit
- De: Dr. Venus Nicolino
- Narrado por: Dr. Venus Nicolino
- Duración: 5 h y 31 m
- Versión completa
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In Bad Advice, relationship expert Dr. Venus Nicolino - aka Dr. V - takes a blowtorch to the shrink-wrapped “feel good” BS that passes for self-help these days. Smart and irreverent, Dr. V fuses the brains and insight of a nerdy PhD with the heart of a doting Italian mother and the artful profanity of a Philly trucker. Dr. V’s signature combination of humor, hard science, and heart make Bad Advice an iconoclastic course correction like no other. Bad Advice is a fiercely sharp wake-up call that tackles some of self-help’s most damaging truisms.
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Not my cup of tea.
- De ocean22 en 05-18-19
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Quantum Love
- Use Your Body's Atomic Energy to Create the Relationship You Desire
- De: Laura Berman Ph.D.
- Narrado por: Laura Berman Ph.D.
- Duración: 11 h y 49 m
- Versión resumida
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Quantum Love is the best possible experience of love, and it's available to absolutely everyone, whether you're seeking a mate, in a relationship that's struggling, or just finding that love has turned lackluster through the stresses of life. You can't go back to the honeymoon phase, but there is something so much better within your reach. Quantum Love lets you reach new heights of intimacy as you gain a fuller sense of purpose in life and love.
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Life-altering book
- De Hailey en 08-02-21
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The Angry Therapist
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Tackling relationships, career, and family issues, John Kim, LMFT, thinks of himself as a life-style designer, not a therapist. His radical new approach, that he sometimes calls “self-help in a shot glass” is easy, real, and to the point. He helps people make changes to their lives so that personal growth happens organically, just by living.
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Great Book. a must listen audio book
- De John Butcher en 03-26-21
De: John Kim
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31 Days of Single on Purpose
- Redefine Everything. Find Yourself First.
- De: John Kim
- Narrado por: John Kim
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Written in John Kim’s unique “advice-in-a-shot glass” style, a month-long program that applies the tenets of his bestseller Single on Purpose, packed with daily tips for self-reflection, growth, and adventure. Whether you’ve embraced the advice in Single on Purpose or are just discovering Kim’s ideas, 31 Days of Single on Purpose can help you transform being single into a joyous, exciting period of personal growth filled with memories, deep work, play, forgiveness, and freedom.
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Love this book!
- De Amanda en 05-21-24
De: John Kim
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Single on Purpose
- Redefine Everything. Find Yourself First.
- De: John Kim
- Narrado por: John Kim
- Duración: 5 h y 17 m
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The author of I Used to Be a Miserable F*ck, The Angry Therapist, now teaches you how to prioritize your relationship with yourself and live a more meaningful life, whether you’re alone, dating, or with a partner. Single. On Purpose. is for people who have never been involved, people who have jumped from partner to partner, and those who have lost themselves in their current relationship - anyone who needs to learn that there’s more to life than who we choose to love.
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Relationship junky!
- De Emily Braun en 01-27-21
De: John Kim
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Break Up on Purpose
- A Catalyst for Growth
- De: John Kim
- Narrado por: John Kim
- Duración: 6 h y 26 m
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Every breakup is a transformation. A breaking down and breaking through to a new version of who you are now, after you have severed ties. Nothing will change you like a broken heart. Yet every breakup is different. John Kim, the Angry Therapist, has seen thousands of patients through breakups of every brutal, freeing, heartbreaking kind—and he’s lived through failed relationships and a divorce of his own. Through his journey as a therapist and as a partner and father, John has identified eight types of unique breakups—and how to get over them.
De: John Kim
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How to Be Alone
- If You Want to, and Even If You Don't
- De: Lane Moore
- Narrado por: Lane Moore
- Duración: 6 h y 3 m
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Lane Moore is a rare performer who is as impressive onstage - whether hosting her iconic show Tinder Live or being the enigmatic front woman of It Was Romance - as she is on the page, as both a former writer for The Onion and an award-winning sex and relationships editor for Cosmopolitan. But her story has had its obstacles, including being her own parent, living in her car as a teenager, and moving to New York City to pursue her dreams. Through it all, she looked to movies, TV, and music as the family and support systems she never had.
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Not a good book
- De Brooke en 08-15-19
De: Lane Moore
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Whole Again
- Healing Your Heart and Rediscovering Your True Self After Toxic Relationships and Emotional Abuse
- De: Jackson MacKenzie, Shannon Thomas - foreword
- Narrado por: Kaleo Griffith, Erin Spencer
- Duración: 8 h y 22 m
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Historia
Jackson MacKenzie has helped millions of people in their struggle to understand the experience of toxic relationships. His first book, Psychopath Free, explained how to identify and survive the immediate situation. In this highly anticipated new audiobook, he guides listeners on what to do next - how to fully heal from abuse in order to find love and acceptance for the self and others. MacKenzie shares insights and tools for working through the protective self we've developed so that we can finally move on to live a full and authentic life.
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Good content, but to much repeat
- De Adri en 03-23-19
De: Jackson MacKenzie, y otros
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The Angry Therapist
- De: John Kim
- Narrado por: John Kim
- Duración: 4 h y 3 m
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Historia
Tackling relationships, career, and family issues, John Kim, LMFT, thinks of himself as a life-style designer, not a therapist. His radical new approach, that he sometimes calls “self-help in a shot glass” is easy, real, and to the point. He helps people make changes to their lives so that personal growth happens organically, just by living.
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Great Book. a must listen audio book
- De John Butcher en 03-26-21
De: John Kim
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31 Days of Single on Purpose
- Redefine Everything. Find Yourself First.
- De: John Kim
- Narrado por: John Kim
- Duración: 1 h y 30 m
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Written in John Kim’s unique “advice-in-a-shot glass” style, a month-long program that applies the tenets of his bestseller Single on Purpose, packed with daily tips for self-reflection, growth, and adventure. Whether you’ve embraced the advice in Single on Purpose or are just discovering Kim’s ideas, 31 Days of Single on Purpose can help you transform being single into a joyous, exciting period of personal growth filled with memories, deep work, play, forgiveness, and freedom.
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Love this book!
- De Amanda en 05-21-24
De: John Kim
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Single on Purpose
- Redefine Everything. Find Yourself First.
- De: John Kim
- Narrado por: John Kim
- Duración: 5 h y 17 m
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The author of I Used to Be a Miserable F*ck, The Angry Therapist, now teaches you how to prioritize your relationship with yourself and live a more meaningful life, whether you’re alone, dating, or with a partner. Single. On Purpose. is for people who have never been involved, people who have jumped from partner to partner, and those who have lost themselves in their current relationship - anyone who needs to learn that there’s more to life than who we choose to love.
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Relationship junky!
- De Emily Braun en 01-27-21
De: John Kim
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Break Up on Purpose
- A Catalyst for Growth
- De: John Kim
- Narrado por: John Kim
- Duración: 6 h y 26 m
- Versión completa
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Historia
Every breakup is a transformation. A breaking down and breaking through to a new version of who you are now, after you have severed ties. Nothing will change you like a broken heart. Yet every breakup is different. John Kim, the Angry Therapist, has seen thousands of patients through breakups of every brutal, freeing, heartbreaking kind—and he’s lived through failed relationships and a divorce of his own. Through his journey as a therapist and as a partner and father, John has identified eight types of unique breakups—and how to get over them.
De: John Kim
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How to Be Alone
- If You Want to, and Even If You Don't
- De: Lane Moore
- Narrado por: Lane Moore
- Duración: 6 h y 3 m
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Lane Moore is a rare performer who is as impressive onstage - whether hosting her iconic show Tinder Live or being the enigmatic front woman of It Was Romance - as she is on the page, as both a former writer for The Onion and an award-winning sex and relationships editor for Cosmopolitan. But her story has had its obstacles, including being her own parent, living in her car as a teenager, and moving to New York City to pursue her dreams. Through it all, she looked to movies, TV, and music as the family and support systems she never had.
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Not a good book
- De Brooke en 08-15-19
De: Lane Moore
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Whole Again
- Healing Your Heart and Rediscovering Your True Self After Toxic Relationships and Emotional Abuse
- De: Jackson MacKenzie, Shannon Thomas - foreword
- Narrado por: Kaleo Griffith, Erin Spencer
- Duración: 8 h y 22 m
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Jackson MacKenzie has helped millions of people in their struggle to understand the experience of toxic relationships. His first book, Psychopath Free, explained how to identify and survive the immediate situation. In this highly anticipated new audiobook, he guides listeners on what to do next - how to fully heal from abuse in order to find love and acceptance for the self and others. MacKenzie shares insights and tools for working through the protective self we've developed so that we can finally move on to live a full and authentic life.
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Good content, but to much repeat
- De Adri en 03-23-19
De: Jackson MacKenzie, y otros
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Perfectly Unique
- Love Yourself Completely, Just As You Are
- De: Annie F. Downs
- Narrado por: Annie Downs
- Duración: 4 h y 1 m
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Your body is a sacred treasure, a worshipful instrument, and a unique masterpiece! That’s a pretty big deal. But sometimes it feels confusing, awkward, and flawed. The truth is: You and your body, all of it, are important and beautiful, designed especially by God with a specific plan and purpose. Each chapter in Perfectly Unique focuses on a different part of your body and the potential it has for helping grow your faith.
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Annie’s fun way of telling spiritual truths.
- De Deanna D. en 12-06-23
De: Annie F. Downs
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Get Out of Your Own Way
- How to Overcome Any Obstacle in Your Life
- De: Larry Winget
- Narrado por: Larry Winget
- Duración: 4 h y 19 m
- Grabación Original
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You think you know what you want in life. You've tried to achieve those things. But if you still don't have them, the culprit may be closer than you think. In this perspective-altering program, the world-renowned Pitbull of Personal Development(tm), Larry Winget, exposes the things you are doing right now to unknowingly prevent your own success in the most important areas of your life.
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Was just OK
- De KatieReviewsStuff en 01-30-17
De: Larry Winget
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The Masculine in Relationship
- A Blueprint for Inspiring the Trust, Lust, and Devotion of a Strong Woman
- De: GS Youngblood
- Narrado por: GS Youngblood
- Duración: 7 h y 22 m
- Versión completa
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Men who want to live with more power, groundedness, and clarity. Men who want to inspire more trust, lust, and devotion from their partner. But this is confusing territory. The modern world tells you that Masculine energy is toxic. And that we’re all the same. That you need to be a Nice Guy that plays it safe. For most men, it is not at all clear HOW to live more from their Masculine core.
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Awful
- De Luis en 02-17-23
De: GS Youngblood
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I Want This to Work
- An Inclusive Guide to Navigating the Most Difficult Relationship Issues We Face in the Modern Age
- De: Elizabeth Earnshaw LMFT CGT
- Narrado por: Elizabeth Earnshaw LMFT CGT
- Duración: 9 h y 27 m
- Versión completa
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Elizabeth Earnshaw is here to help. The renowned Gottman therapist, founder of A Better Life Therapy, and influential Instagram therapist behind @lizlistens has helped to transform countless relationships. With I Want This to Work, she presents for today’s generation the most effective and proven steps for relationship success.
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I want this to work too. Excellent information, excruciating execution
- De Sunny Bettley en 03-17-23
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You Will Find Your People
- De: Lane Moore
- Narrado por: Lane Moore
- Duración: 5 h y 48 m
- Versión completa
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Historia
Like many people navigating adulthood, Lane Moore thought she would have friends by now. Movies, books, and TV shows tell us we should’ve already found our people by the time we’re adults, or there must be something wrong with us. But where do you find these close friends once you’ve left high school or college? Is it even possible? You Will Find Your People is the groundbreaking guide to making—and keeping—the friends we’ve all been desperately waiting for.
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Cringy
- De Rachel en 07-06-23
De: Lane Moore
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It's Not You
- Identifying and Healing from Narcissistic People
- De: Ramani Durvasula PhD
- Narrado por: Ramani Durvasula PhD
- Duración: 11 h y 31 m
- Versión completa
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Historia
It’s not always easy to tell when you’re dealing with a narcissist. One day they draw you in with their confidence and charisma, the next they gaslight you, wreck your self-confidence, and leave you wondering, What could I have done differently? As Dr. Ramani Durvasula reveals in It's Not You, the answer is: absolutely nothing. Just as a tiger can’t change its stripes, a narcissist won’t stop manipulating and invalidating you. To heal in the aftermath of their abuse and protect yourself from future harm, you first have to accept that you are not to blame.
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I needed this
- De Austin E. Jonas Jr. en 03-02-24
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Anxiously Attached
- Becoming More Secure in Life and Love
- De: Jessica Baum LMHC
- Narrado por: Jessica Baum LMHC
- Duración: 9 h y 26 m
- Versión completa
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Historia
An estimated 47 million Americans identify as having an anxious attachment style, which can make being in relationships turbulent and emotionally taxing for them. According to groundbreaking research in the field of attachment, anxious types are more prone to insecurity, jealousy, codependency, and other behaviors that get in the way of finding and sustaining love.
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So slow
- De RSC en 04-20-23
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Loving Your Spouse When You Feel Like Walking Away
- De: Gary Chapman
- Narrado por: Chris Fabry
- Duración: 6 h y 47 m
- Versión completa
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When you said, “I do”, you entered marriage with high hopes, dreaming it would be supremely happy. You never intended for it to be miserable. Millions of couples are struggling in desperate marriages. But the story doesn’t have to end there. Dr. Gary Chapman writes, “I believe that in every troubled marriage, one or both partners can take positive steps that have the potential for changing the emotional climate in their marriage.”
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encouragement through another chance
- De Brookley en 09-19-18
De: Gary Chapman
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F--k Your Feelings: Master Your Mind, Accomplish Anything and Become a More Significant Human
- De: Ryan Munsey
- Narrado por: Ryan Munsey
- Duración: 9 h y 15 m
- Versión completa
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95 percent of decisions are based on feelings. Not logic. Not rational thought. Feelings. Can you feel the pull of emotions, hunger, guilt, pain, jealously, depression, and everything else weighing on every decision that you make? Business owners, entrepreneurs, regular people looking to get in shape, anyone with a goal that isn't terrified of tough love - you need to listen to F--k Your Feelings - as soon as possible! In this audiobook you'll learn how to use personal mind control techniques to control the way your brain is wired and much more.
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Science heavy for those of us who want the why
- De Beth T. Irwin en 10-29-18
De: Ryan Munsey
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Love Life
- How to Raise Your Standards, Find Your Person, and Live Happily (No Matter What)
- De: Matthew Hussey
- Narrado por: Matthew Hussey
- Duración: 11 h y 1 m
- Versión completa
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Finding love can be hard. Being single can feel even harder. In Love Life, world-renowned coach and New York Times bestselling author Matthew Hussey provides a practical roadmap for letting go of past relationships, overcoming the fear of getting left behind, and finding the love we want.
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The chapter on hard conversations was useful
- De Amazon Customer en 05-20-24
De: Matthew Hussey
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The Game: 41 Shades of Men
- The Pursuit to Subdue and Use You
- De: Princella L.R. Clark
- Narrado por: Princella L.R. Clark
- Duración: 6 h y 6 m
- Versión completa
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In The Game: 41 Shades of Men, The Pursuit to Subdue and Use You, male psychology expert and author, Princella Clark, removes all the mystery of the male's behavior in this short but impactful guide to decoding the hidden intentions of a male's pursuit of you.
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Thank you for saving lives❤️
- De Anonymous User en 10-23-23
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How to Talk to Anyone
- 92 Little Tricks for Big Success in Relationships
- De: Leil Lowndes
- Narrado por: Joyce Bean, Leil Lowndes
- Duración: 8 h y 59 m
- Versión completa
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General
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Historia
What is that magic quality that makes some people instantly loved and respected? Everyone wants to be their friend (or, if single, their lover!) In business, they rise swiftly to the top of the corporate ladder. What is their "Midas touch?"
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Good info, but painful to listen to
- De Scott en 09-19-16
De: Leil Lowndes
Lo que los oyentes dicen sobre It's Not Me, It's You
Calificaciones medias de los clientesReseñas - Selecciona las pestañas a continuación para cambiar el origen de las reseñas.
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- Anonymous User
- 10-07-22
Life changing!
I found this book when I needed it the most! Thank You! I realized I was wrong in so many things when it comes to the idea of love and a healthy relationship!
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- Randall Brandon
- 09-30-22
Clarity!
Amazing reading! Life changing if your in a relationship and you want it to stand the test of time.
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- Amazon Customer
- 01-15-23
Best book to listen to to expand your view on a relationship
This book touched me. I found myself laughing out of relatability, yet retiring to listen when in need of strength, comfort and understanding in my own relationship. Each chapter is crafted to perfection. I love the intertwine between Vanessa’s and johns perspective. They would talk about a topic, give it structure, add their own relationship into it then give you guidance on how to work through it. It was raw, yet well composed. I found several similarities to how Vanessa and John are to my own relationship. I felt comforted in the arms of this book and wished it wouldn’t end. I hope to see Vanessa write more books as I allied with her perspective more than johns, but the togetherness and self understanding of faults and challenges is what made this book so pure and purposeful. I have recommended it to all of my friends in a relationship, because they talk about what isn’t talked about and adds reason to keep the boat afloat when you feel like you see holes. It’s honest and will listen to it more than once. Do yourself a favor and let yourself grow throughout this book!
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- Jessica jenson
- 12-20-22
Hmm
makes you look at your everyday relationships in perspective. will listen again to use in my everyday life
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- Protector of the Unknown
- 10-25-22
Another Successful Book!
I have read most of John's books and it's great to have Vanessa speaking about her side of the story too! I hope there is a sequel to this book! Thank you for all that you do!
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- Amazon Customer
- 12-28-23
Will read again!
This book does such a good job looking at a lot of key relationship elements. There is a lot to take away for both friendships and romantic relationships. I wanted to keep reading but found myself purposely putting the book down to critically think about the information being provided. Great read!
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- Elizabeth B.
- 07-17-23
Best relationship & codependency book I’ve read in a long time
I loved how this book challenged me to in specific ways to look again at why I don’t speak up in my marriage. I also got a clearer understanding of the role love languages plays in my being haunted by exes & feeling unloved in my marriage. I appreciate the attachment book and love language book recommendations.
I wish there had been more resources for discerning emotional abuse, the confusion it creates and safe steps to take to own my codependency while not exposing myself unnecessarily to an unsafe person.
I feel the need to buy the hard copy version of the book to review it and to journal my responses to questions. And there was mention of a breakout box on codependent types that I think I missed in the audio version.
I has sworn off relationship books b/c I think I’ve tried everything, but this book actually fired me up to take a deeper look at my tendencies for the personal benefit it will bring me as well as to fulfill my obligation to my current and future relationships.
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esto le resultó útil a 4 personas
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- Casey R Grim
- 11-29-24
Straightforward
Another great book, now plus a great partner. Thank you both for everything you put into this. Let’s change the world.
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- Ubaldo C.
- 01-29-23
If you want an honest look at love
It’s a must read if you are really trying to understand what it takes for a relationship to succeed
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- Amazon Customer
- 10-17-22
Great book for relationships!!
I loved it! I couldn't get thru it fast enough and the topics were helpful. definitely a great read!
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