User talk:SysRq/10

This is an ARCHIVED talk page. Please do not edit this, or I WILL kill you.

Rape!

Talk page devirginization complete! You may now weep at the loss of innocence. - P.M., WotM, & GUN, Sir Led Balloon (Tick Tock) (Contribs) 02:12, Dec 30

Daaaaaad...you silly. —Sir SysRq (talk) 02:16, 30 December 2008 (UTC)

My life is in a shambles!

All this time I was pronouncing your username as sis-are-cue. This will take some getting used to. • • • Necropaxx (T) {~} 08:35, Jan 1

Yeah, it's just two syllables. Sis-reck. How do you say your name? I keep on saying nee-krah-pee-my-kul-moar-packs and I know that's not right. —Sir SysRq (talk) 20:39, 1 January 2009 (UTC)

S-Y-S-R-Q!!! Sir Orian57~Christmas!~Talk 21:06 1 January 2009

Fuck, and I have NO idea how to pronounce Orian. Now, maybe if it were spelled correctly, like "Orion", then I would just say oh-rie-yun. —Sir SysRq (talk) 21:08, 1 January 2009 (UTC)

Oooh, a debate on pronunciation, I'd better not get into that! –—Hv (talk) 1/01 21:19

No, stick around, erm, hee-run-vee-nun-nee-vun-hee-nuv-eee-uh-ree-vuh-pree-nup-veen. —Sir SysRq (talk) 21:23, 1 January 2009 (UTC)

What part of "Orion is not my name nor was it ever intended to be" do you not get? Orian is pronounced Oh-rye-an, where as Orion is pronouced Oh-rye-on, so you're wrong whatever. But then you are American. Sir Orian57~Christmas!~Talk 22:33 1 January 2009

You still have yet to explain to my satisfaction why the hell you misspelled your own username. —Sir SysRq (talk) 22:35, 1 January 2009 (UTC)

well at least I can say it right. /bitch hand flick Yeah I'm being bitchy. Sir Orian57~Christmas!~Talk 04:21 2 January 2009

Yet Another Award

You voted for UnNews:New Range of Low-Tech Personal Music Players Released on VFH which entitles you to this FREE copy of the 1921 hit single I Wouldn’t Take Her To a Dog Fight, 'Cause I’m Afraid She’d Win by Brigadier Billy Bell-Ende and his Jazz Rhythm Orchestra which is only slightly scratched. Rabbi Techno

With Great Appreciation

--    13:45, 2 January 2009 (UTC)

UnSignpost 1st January 2009

The Uncyclopedia UnSignpost

May contain traces of humor!

January 1st, 2009 • Issue 29 • The first newspaper to wish you a Happy Christmas 2009!

The UnSignpost starts 2009 as it ended 2008: Late The UnSignpost, the wiki newspaper with the highest staff turnover on the interwebs, has made a promising start to 2009, by being late with the first issue of the year. Gentleman editor UU said "I could say the issue was ready on time, but it was tricky to find a paperbot, but we at the Signpost have never hid behind excuses. Oh no, wait, we do that all the time. I couldn't be bothered to hunt hard enough to find a paperbot. Sorry. Still, it's not like the readers expect better, is it?" Several readers were probably available for comment, but we didn't ask them anything and blatantly made one up: "it wouldn't be the UnSignpost if it arrived on time", Orian57 might have said, if we'd asked him. The Patronising New Year EditorialTM If you follow a sensible calendar, and not a Chinese, Jewish, Muslim, Celtic or whatever one, a New Year has just dawned, bringing with it the faintest vestiges of hope. Hope that things may just be different this time. Hope that we may keep a resolution for longer than a week. Hope that we will achieve all those targets our hearts desire. Hope that mankind may finally rise above the pettiness of squabbling between families, religions and nations, and unite in a glorious surge towards a bright, common future. From this we can infer that Andy Dufresne in The Shawshank Redemption didn't have a clue what he was on about - hope is a ridiculous thing, and should be crushed as soon as possible. However, there is still the possibility, however remote, that something good might happen. Active users might start writing more good articles again. VFH might start to flow like it used to. Old users may return, invigorated, to bestow upon us fresh fruits of their imaginations. New users may arrive to take up the baton, and stride boldly forward, blessing us with a wealth of new articles that inject fresh purpose and impetus to the site. Don't look like that - it might happen. Well, monkeys might also fly out of your butt. Depends if teleportation technology ever becomes viable, widely available, and small enough to secure in such a narrow location. Face it, we haven't a clue what this year holds for us yet, folks, all we can do is try and make it the best we can by writing more articles, and helping new users out, and see where we go from there. This is your UnSignpost, patronising the fuck out of you. Happy New Year! Kevin Rudd says Uncyclopedia is the worst By Joe9320 Recently, Kevin Rudd said that Uncyclopedia is the worst. In his statement when he was at his speech in Beijing, China, he said "Uncyclopedia is the worst. They put up articles of disgust, nonsense and rudeness. Fuck Uncyclopedia! It's just a plain ripoff of Wikipedia" Then he went on to say how Uncyclopedia is bad. He also said "Illogicopedia is nonsensical, but much better than Uncyclopedia. Even Wikipedia doesn't have anything disgusting on it, despite articles about rude words". As the people of Uncyclopedia, we totally disagree on Mr Rudd's comments on Uncyclopedia. People should realise that this great website is not a ripoff of Wikipedia. Hail Cthulhu!

Check out these pages! Something about us being the worst, maybe? Possessive pride The "bring back Gert" bandwagon starts here Upstanding songwriting competition From our logs: 14:04, 26 December 2008 Modusoperandi (Talk | contribs) blocked 68.59.56.100 (Talk) with an expiry time of 1 month ‎ (For doing something to a page on Phil Collins. You have terrible taste.) 12:56, 25 December 2008 Manticore (Talk | contribs) blocked YourFriend (Talk | contribs) with an expiry time of Judgement Day ‎ (If I shove a Christmas tree up your ass, does that make you an angel?) 21:23, 18 December 2008 TheLedBalloon (Talk | contribs) blocked 69.182.114.238 (Talk) with an expiry time of 6 months ‎ (Your edits are bad on a scale I haven't seen in quite some time. You'd be the chosen one if the goal of this wiki was to make shitty stubs about your friends.) Biopic of the Week Proudly the worst since 2005, Uncyclopedia is the place all subscribers to this newspaper will have edited at least once. That means you are directly responsible for its worstness. We hope you feel suitably chastened. Year of the week 2008. As far as years went, it was OK - there were days in it, things happened and whatnot. People joined, people left, people returned, people lurked, people vandalised, and drama was never far away. But it's probably the best year we've had for at least 8 months. Year that hasn't happened yet of the week. 2022. We just get a good feeling about it. It'll probably suck now. Exhortation to vote on stuff of the week We at the UnSignpost know how much you all love voting, so what better treat than the bumper crop of New Year voting pages? Top 10 of Dec, WotY, UotY, PotY, WotM, UotM, PotM, RotM, VFH, VFD... How much fun can you have in one month?

UnSignpost Main Page • Contact the Editors • Sign Up for Delivery • Get the Userbox

MrN9001 01:04, 3 January 2009 (UTC)

Canz i hav...

an AWAERD plz? I amz sow loneley an may tawk paje iz soooooo enptee. <goez ov too crai n a cornar> --Master Soul 823 02:45, 4 January 2009 (UTC)

Hm. And what sort of award do you fancy? —Sir SysRq (talk) 19:02, 4 January 2009 (UTC)

Eh FAENCY woen pehapz? Master Soul 823 15:20, 11 January 2009 (UTC)

Did you come from another wiki by any chance? —Sir SysRq (talk) 18:06, 11 January 2009 (UTC)

You see that is what I hate about Scotland. It's illeterate and proud. Trying to pass that off as a language of any sort is an insult to the mind. SK Sir Orian57Talk RotM 21:32 11 January 2009

I know, fuck the Scots. —Sir SysRq (talk) 21:34, 11 January 2009 (UTC)

Yeah! Burn them if they refuse to speak properly and stop wearing kilts and eating haggis and being ginger... they're just shit. SK Sir Orian57Talk RotM 21:38 11 January 2009

Buncha faggots up there, that's what they are. You can't throw a rock in Scotland without hitting a goddam fag. —Sir SysRq (talk) 22:12, 11 January 2009 (UTC)

Are we talking about the same Scotland? SK Sir Orian57Talk RotM 06:34 12 January 2009

On Uncyclopedia:Writer of the Year

Cheek! Not written anything? What about Tim Rice, The Goodies, Denzel Washington, The Beano and a few more I forget. --Vegetationlife 21:35, 8 January 2009 (UTC)

It may be a good idea to keep a list of your articles on your userpage so that others can easily find your works. Lots of us do it, so conform or else. Also, try responding to messages on the talk page that the conversation started on. —Sir SysRq (talk) 22:01, 8 January 2009 (UTC)

UnSignpost 8th January 09

The Uncyclopedia UnSignpost

Now With 0 Trans Fat!

January 8th, 2009 • Issue 30 • Suckling the Milk of News from the Teat of Truth

Uncyclopedians on Xbox Live By SysRq Recently, hundreds dozens some Uncyclopedians have joined the ranks of thousands of pizza-faced proud high school graduates and pre-pubescent twelve year old boys in the dysfunctional, loosely connected network of gamers known as Xbox Live. Among these traitors to Uncyclopedia were Orian57, a friend of the UnSignpost and frequently featured writer. Other Uncyclopedians on Xbox Live include The Woodburninator, Mhaille, Bonner, and Heerenveen. How could such successful Uncyclopedians go so wrong? I went undercover as "Pope Gustav" to expose these turncoats and find out why they abandoned the site in such numbers. The following is an actual transcript between me (under the alias "Pope Gustav") and Orian57 (under the alias "Orian57") on Xbox Live. Pope Gustav: Hey buddy, it's SysRq from Uncyclopedia. Orian57: Hello. You want to play some Horde? Pope Gustav: Yeah, man. We're playing on Gridlock, right? Orian57: Actually, Security is a much easier map for Horde. Pope Gustav: Cool. This is stunning evidence that Orian57, along with others, is leaving the site for the glamorous life of Xbox Live. When confronted with this transcript and these accusations, Orian replied that "I was just on Uncyclopedia today. I was just bored and wanted something else to do." Oddly enough, all of the other Uncyclopedians that have Xbox Live accounts that I spoke to also claimed to have "lives" outside of Uncyclopedia, lives that mainly consist of playing Halo 3. Article gets 21 votes on VFH By Mnbvcxz. Only a few days after going back to featuring "Today's Featured Article" for only one day, instead of the previous two, the article, The defense rests, your honor received 21 "for" votes and no "against" after a mere 3 days on VFH. The article, nominated on VFH by SysRq, and written by noted admin Modusoperandi, is the first article surpass 20 votes in a long while on VFH. Upon hearing of his accomplishment, Modus is heard to have said, "I'd like to thank all of the little people that I crushed to get where I am," and, "Can I wear my Kernel Popcorn costume?" SysRq, the article nominator is quoted as saying, "I was the one who nommed that article; I deserve some recognition." For those of you are new around here, VFH is the process by which uncyclopedia nominates articles for "Today's Featured Article", the article in the top left corner on the mainpage. All users of uncyclopedia, including anonymous ip users are encouraged to vote on VFH and nominate articles on VFH. VFH can be found here, but typing in VFH in the search box, by clicking the "Votes for Highlight" link under the community links on the right (it's second from the bottom between "Pee Review" and "Votes for Pictures"), and Uncyclopedia:VFH, in addition to several other redirects. Many users have expressed approval of this accomplishment, as the more votes an article gets, the better an article is. Therefore, by voting on an article, one injects more quality into an article, in the same way that manufacturers "inspect" quality back into a finished part. Additionally, the admins will not longer be forced to torture various cute animals to inspire users to vote in VFH: provided VFH doesn't stall out again.

Check out these pages! Serious Bitchin' Business Women farting on baked goods... Who was that guy? From our logs: 14:30, 7 January 2009 Mordillo (Talk | contribs) blocked 69.249.151.205 (Talk) with an expiry time of 1 week ‎ (hi hi poop? That's the best you can do?) 22:38, 6 January 2009 Mordillo (Talk | contribs) blocked 151.201.148.112 (Talk) with an expiry time of 3 months ‎ (People who don't learn need to get extra lessons via their anus. Well, I'm here to give extra lessons. Bend over mister!) 15:22, 4 January 2009 TheLedBalloon (Talk | contribs) blocked 79.175.81.253 (Talk) with an expiry time of 1 week ‎ (1nd, I have 2 dads, and 2th, just because I am the product of dirty, dirty incest, and also a fuckface, that is no reason to blank my talkpage. Fuckface.) Biopic of the Week Whatever else you say about Mordillo, you can't say he's idle. Except in real life, because he's spending all his time on his computer, banning asshats, deleting crap, making stuff happen, writing quality articles, and sorting shit out. Of course, as he's a Zionist, it's all part of a wider conspiracy to control our very thoughts, but that's probably a small price to pay for such an efficient admin. Old School Featured Article of the Week I'm a dick. A private dick. That's like a private dancer but with a gun and dances cost extra. That's how we do it in the detective game. It's a game like Clue, but without the cards or the board. Just the dice. And they always come up snake eyes. The name is Gwendolyne. Last name's not important. All you need to know is my friends call me Gwendolyne. My friends are bourbon and ice and I haven't spoken to ice in years. Translated Uncyclopedia Article of the Week Drill Sergeant in Mexican. ¡UN INSTRUCTOR DE ENTRENAMIENTO ES LO QUE CARAJOS SOY! ¡DESDE AHORA NADA VENDRÁ DE ESA INMUNDA COLADERA LLENA DE CACA QUE USTED LLAMA BOCA! ¡SÓLO RESPONDERÁ CON 'SÍ SEÑOR' O 'NO SEÑOR'! ¿¡ENTIENDE RECLUTA!? Read the original. The welcome(?) return of Cajek ban of the week 09:46, 7 January 2009 RAHB (Talk | contribs) blocked Cajek (Talk | contribs) with an expiry time of 2 hours ‎ (Cajek, you have no idea how wasted I am. 15 shots of gin and somehow I'm still awake. And blocking you. Fuck yes.)

UnSignpost Main Page • Contact the Editors • Sign Up for Delivery • Get the Userbox

MrN9001 16:08, 9 January 2009 (UTC)

Ye Gods!

Your userpage. It's so beautiful. - [19:16 12 January 2009] YYettie

Why thank you. I did that not too long ago and decided that I liked it. You were the inspiration, of course. —Sir SysRq (talk) 19:45, 12 January 2009 (UTC)

Oh of course. I'm a very inspiring person. :D - [19:49 12 January 2009] YYettie

Indeed. The rounded edges and such are becoming a new "thing" for me, much as large borders and Courier New font were for you. —Sir SysRq (talk) 19:52, 12 January 2009 (UTC)

They were? I did? Wow that sounds cool. I used to be so cool. - [20:01 12 January 2009] YYettie

Yeah, it's like Orian to penises. It's just your thing. Oh, what was that other thing you used to do? Didn't you have some catchphrase like "IIIIIIIII'M PRICELESS!" and the studio audience would laugh every time you said it? Like in that one episode when you got raped by my computer's optical drive? And you came away all bleeding from the anus and crying and like "IIIIIIIII'M PRICELESS!" and we all laughed. —Sir SysRq (talk) 20:33, 12 January 2009 (UTC)

Oh I remember that. It took me weeks for my writers to write those two words. Remember the time I made that man-on-elephant porn video? Ahh good times. - [20:40 12 January 2009] YYettie

Yeah...never mind. Probably wasn't the same elephant. —Sir SysRq (talk) 20:42, 12 January 2009 (UTC)

Uh? Sex? - [20:48 12 January 2009] YYettie

Oh my god that's so cool. You're mentioning me and you don't even need to! That gives me a warm fuzzy feeling. It's like if Kiefer Sutherland were to read this sentence he'd be all like: "That guy must like 24". Except for the fact that it's mad, and he looks implausably short. ~Orian57~ ~Talk~ 21:39 12 January 2009

Ghey. —Sir SysRq (talk) 01:24, 13 January 2009 (UTC)

Message from Santa

Ho bloody ho You paid your inflated entrance fee for Lapland New Forest so I guess you should have some sort of Christmas present. Here, tell you what, have this crappy lovely dolly then go and feed the reindeer - carrots are only £3 each from our gift shop.

Santa...I miss you. You won't return my calls anymore. What happened to us? —Sir SysRq (talk) 19:52, 13 January 2009 (UTC)

He doesn't even call me! And I've slept with him three years in a row. Regular as clockwork, every xmas eve, and what do I get for it? Bloody squashed mince pies in the post! - [20:05 13 January 2009] YYettie

Thanks

Thanks alot for welcoming me and for the good luck on the NOTM! Thanks also for your help, I will definitely need it. And no I do not have an adopter yet should I? Thanks! --Tagstit 20:26, 15 January 2009 (UTC)

Aye, no worries mate. An adopter would be a good idea if you feel like you may need an experienced editor/abusive father to help you around the site for a while until you're a responsible Uncyclopedian like, erm, actually I can't think of any Uncyclopedians that would be considered "responsible." I happen to be an adopter of noobs, and would be more than happy to mentor you for a small fee. Just let me know if you're interested. —Sir SysRq (talk) 21:42, 15 January 2009 (UTC)

I'm interested. ~Orian57~ ~Talk~ 22:34 15 January 2009

Ya sure that would be awesome! How do you adopt me? --Tagstit 22:45, 15 January 2009 (UTC)

well first we kidnap you and take you to a secure location, then your assigned master makes you write funny. You will not be released. ~Orian57~ ~Talk~ 22:50 15 January 2009

You say "Ya sure that would be awesome!" on my talk page. Rather simple, really. Slap a template on your page and you're good to go. I am now your UnDaddy, as per the tradition here on Uncyc. —Sir SysRq (talk) 23:34, 15 January 2009 (UTC)

Putting Un in front of words to make tehm true. ~Orian57~ ~Talk~ 23:40 15 January 2009

Alright sweet, what do I do after the template? Like, what do you help me with?--Tagstit 23:41, 15 January 2009 (UTC)

Wiki code, funny qualities in articles how to handle the fact that nobody takes anything seriously around here and other stuff you have questions about. ~Orian57~ ~Talk~ 23:42 15 January 2009

Rather clever, innit? Oh, and Tagstit, you can consider Orian a sort of stepdaddy in that you only see him when I'm not around and he doesn't pay bills. However, much unlike a real stepdad, you may walk in on us from time to time having sexual intercourse. Your first task as my noob is to find me on IRC, as I just woke up from a nap and need something mindless to do for the next 20 minutes or so as my brain regains various functions in no particular order. I should be on for a little bit. (Oh, and my IRC name is SisReck, just a phonetic spelling of my Uncyc username so don't be alarmed by my sexual advances.) Also, never edit conflict daddy. —Sir SysRq (talk) 23:45, 15 January 2009 (UTC)

S-Y-S-R-Q!!!!!! ~Orian57~ ~Talk~ 23:46 15 January 2009

Hallo, Orian. —Sir SysRq (talk) 23:50, 15 January 2009 (UTC)

I read your T.Rex thing, you are now my hero. That was the funniest shit i have EVER read. Dear god, i had tears at some parts. Amazing dude, just simply, amazing, wow haha well ya thats it haha --Tagstit 01:07, 16 January 2009 (UTC)

Sure that was good but have you read this? ~Orian57~ ~Talk~ 02:19 16 January 2009

Hey I am on a different computer right now and none of the IRCs work so I can only talk through this right now, sorry =/ please impart wisdom on my page though! And I really wanna get the cardboard box up and running so your tips would be helpful so I can try to get it nominated!--Tagstit 02:57, 16 January 2009 (UTC)

Alas, I must go and finish my sonata now. I'd like to have it done before I leave. We'll pick this up tomorrow. —Sir SysRq (talk) 03:06, 16 January 2009 (UTC)

UnSignpost 15th January

The Uncyclopedia UnSignpost

Because Uncyclopedia is no laughing matter.

January 15, 2009 • Issue 31 • Making the New York Times look like Mad Magazine (or is that the other way round?)

From The Desk of the Cabal: Incest and sex change are now bannable offenses From the desk of the cabal. Embedded with the last person who came looking for the cabal Following the sex change operations of citizen (now citizeness) Yettie, and several suspicious sexual activities in the Uncyclopedia compound, the Cabal hereby decrees the following: Sex changes are only allowed if the citizen wishes to become a voluptuous female. Any other operations are banned (particularly those who wish to become males, or just more manly looking, in order to improve their chances of scoring with various Uncyclopedians of either gender). Any sexual activities with family members is strictly prohibited. Exceptions are: members of the AAN family members, who can shag aunts and granddaughters as much as they'd like. Sex tax is now in affect. All sex acts taking place in Uncyclopedia are taxable. Taxes should be paid to Olipro no more than 24 hours after the act has taken place. Acceptable currencies are: Euros, Dollars, Pounds, Young Boys and Camels. Thank you citizens, this message was not delivered by the Cabal which does not exist. Behave nice, vote on VFH and obey the Cabal. The Cabal is your friend. Or it would be. If it existed. Pee Revuu? In a surprise move, Boomer, former dictator in absentia of PEEING, the group for opinionated users who enjoy nothing more than giving a good Pee Review, has announced his official retirement. His last official act was to appoint Under user, noted reviewer and maintainer of the Pee Review committee page, to his old position of Captain Catheter. Some regular pee reviewers are worried; Orian57 was heard to say "If UU is going to do Boomer's job, then who the hell are we going to get to do UU's old job of keeping track of pee reviews, judging the quality of pee reviews, and actually getting around to doing the occasional pee review? Don't look at me, I'm gay." UU himself dismissed such fears, pointing out that he's got nothing better to do with his time than arbitrarily judge the quality of other people's opinions anyway, and adding "I'm relieved to be taking up this position as it will drastically reduce the number of reviews I'm expected to do. Also, I'm thinking of introducing a policy of stripping Orian57, and only him, of his RotM award, his rank, his mittens and his right to drink hot chocolate ever again unless he does a bloody review some time soon". However, some users are still not convinced this is a good idea, or even possible. One, speaking on condition of anonymity, said, "I seriously doubt that UU can do Boomer's job and his own at the same time. I mean, how can he be accused of being a lazy arse if he has almost twice as many good pee reviews as anyone else and does 75% of the pee review maintenance tasks? This ruins the running pee review committee in-joke about Captain Catheter not doing anything. There is no way this can work."

Check out these pages! Rcmurphy of the Year Mooses pops back for some bandwagon action The reason for 4pedia From our logs: 08:25, 13 January 2009 Mordillo (Talk | contribs) blocked Tardman (Talk | contribs) with an expiry time of Judgement Day ‎ (I love being a cunt, it makes my hair glow) 23:58, 12 January 2009 TheLedBalloon (Talk | contribs) blocked 218.186.12.218 (Talk) with an expiry time of 1 day ‎ (Replacing a page with 'Hey uncyclopedians, edit this please' is basically the same thing as replacing it with 'Hey uncyclopedia admins, ban me please.' Talk pages are your friend. Blanking is not.) 01:06, 12 January 2009 TheLedBalloon (Talk | contribs) blocked 86.135.165.198 (Talk) with an expiry time of Judgement Day ‎ (Hey! I remember you! You evaded that ban that one time, remember? Good times, man, good times.) 15:17, 10 January 2009 Modusoperandi (Talk | contribs) blocked Modus Operandi (Talk | contribs) with an expiry time of 2 months ‎ (1 month for being an ass, the other for that stupid username.) Biopic of the Week It's hard to define the singular entity known as Modusoperandi in mere words. He's like Uncyclopedia's wandering troubadour of amusing non-sequiturs: roaming the land in search of discussions worthy of his absurdist input, sitting by the campfire of the conversation, treating those assembled to another whimsical one-liner, and then heading off toward another exchange where his presence is required. Kinda like the Littlest Hobo, but with jokes. And lots of awards, featured articles, admin powers and suchlike. VFD Delete vote of the week Delete How many half-baked, stale jokes can we fit on one page? More importantly, how can something be stale and yet only half-baked? by Syndrome on Awesomeness. Transatlantic jaunt of the week After many months in the hands of that most malevolent of dictators, the United States date format, the New Year allowed our stand-up English editor to put the UnSignpost printing presses on a 747 to what this journalist considers the correct British format! Rejoice! (Note: What you paid for this paper may or may not have gone on the presses' ticket. We don't know. It may also have gone on that booze over there.)

UnSignpost Main Page • Contact the Editors • Sign Up for Delivery • Get the Userbox

MrN9001 21:34, 15 January 2009 (UTC)

VFH

DUDE! I had no idea, but I fixed up my scary movie article and sent it into pee review and it got a better score than Cardboard Box, 41.9 and was nominated for VFH. Pretty exciting! --Tagstit 14:41, 16 January 2009 (UTC)

Could I possibly get a look through on Cardboard Box now from you? If you have time =) --Tagstit 21:18, 17 January 2009 (UTC)

Absolutely. You'll find that I often need a bit of a poke before I do things. Thanks, I'll do that now. —Sir SysRq (talk) 21:20, 17 January 2009 (UTC)

Haha sweet thanks alot =)--Tagstit 21:30, 17 January 2009 (UTC)

*Poke* ~Orian57~ ~Talk~ 04:25 18 January 2009

Why yes, I did just make an edit. And now I am off to bed, for it is 11:26 at night. Gnight, Orian. —Sir SysRq (talk) 04:27, 18 January 2009 (UTC)

gnight. ~Orian57~ ~Talk~ 04:47 18 January 2009

dude...

dude!! look at this! <youtube>NNoX0SAPsSI</youtube> ~Orian57~ ~Talk~ 15:30 18 January 2009

Wow, who uploaded that? —Sir SysRq (talk) 17:54, 18 January 2009 (UTC)

I unno, some guy called Joe -- but aren't you mortified that this has had 45 views, that means I have to be embarrased 45 more times than I originally thought. here's the link to the page: [1] I think we should flag it -- it's clearly not for the all American fammily and it talks about sodomy. Probably. ~Orian57~ ~Talk~ 20:52 18 January 2009

Probably. Now that I think about it, does Creative Commons protect that kind of redistributing of our work? —Sir SysRq (talk) 20:55, 18 January 2009 (UTC)

I'm pretty sure they aren't allowed to claim the copy right like they do at the start of the vid but to be honest i'm not over fussed i'd rather someone else take the blame. ~Orian57~ ~Talk~ 21:04 18 January 2009

Yeah, I'm not gonna really look into it or anything. But I did leave a comment on the video so maybe this guy will get in touch with me or something. Rather weird, though, some random user that nobody seems to know uploading UnTunes stuff to Youtube. —Sir SysRq (talk) 21:07, 18 January 2009 (UTC)

If there wa s alink to uncyc there it might be good but I'd like to know what JNNN TV is, I hope it isn't some forengn channel showing terrible internet shit (no offence but you didn't improve it at all) I'm mean how embarrassed would I have to be then?. I better start now just in case. ~Orian57~ ~Talk~ 21:14 18 January 2009

Question

Hey just wondering, is it considered bad taste on this site to vote for yourself or your article for an award or a Featured thing? Thanks--Tagstit 00:23, 19 January 2009 (UTC)

Not at all, we are whores. Filthy, filthy sluts that will have sex with anyone for very little money. Yeah, vote for your own articles and such, vote for yourself on NotM, but there are some cases where I personally do not feel comfortable voting for myself. That is, however, a rare occurrence for I am, after all, an Uncyclopedian and therefore am a whore. Please direct all questions from now on to your stepdad, as I have to be up at 4 in the morning to get on a plane to Texas for the week. I have an audition for the Baylor School of Music on Saturday, around 11am Central, so do wish me luck. Until next Sunday, cheers! —Sir SysRq (talk) 00:29, 19 January 2009 (UTC)

Later! Good luck! Thanks for everything so far! --Tagstit 00:53, 19 January 2009 (UTC)

Hey Honey You're Home!

Just stating the obvious after waiting here for a week. I can go now? ~Orian57~ ~Talk~ 03:00 26 January 2009

I have literally been in my house for about twelve minutes. You, my friend, are freaking me the fuck out. Glad to be back. How has the site been? I know y'all stop everything when I leave and just wait for me, like my dog does when I go to take a shit and leave the door open just because I'm home alone and I can do that. —Sir SysRq (talk) 03:05, 26 January 2009 (UTC)

Well I've done two reviews. And I'm attempting to re-write an article. My power rangers article could do with another vote. And... I don't think anything else of any consequence has happened. Probabably loads actually but you know this place, it's all forgotten so quickly it's like it never happened. ~Orian57~ ~Talk~ 03:13 26 January 2009

Oh thank god your back! It was getting really scary with my stepdad drunk all the time and hitting me. He even made me do some things and it hurt my bum pretty bad...well...he said to keep it a secret...in fact...he said if I don't keep it a secret he will blow my brains out...he showed me the gun...but anyways, I got a feature! Woot!--Tagstit 07:21, 26 January 2009 (UTC)

Congrats, kiddo! Oh, and I brought you something from Texas. Except I haven't made it yet, I'm gonna do that now and pretend like I got it from Texas to say it was a souvenir when I just didn't feel like spending any money. Oh, and I forgot to mention that your stepdad will, without a doubt, rape you just about anywhere as long as I'm not around. That could have been useful information to have. Anyways, I'll be on your talk page in a jiffy. Hang on. —Sir SysRq (talk) 02:57, 27 January 2009 (UTC)

Hey I mentioned my power rangers article up there and the Top ten vote. You obviously don't have to vote or anything but I'm just curious as to why you think Insomnia was better? ~Orian57~ ~Talk~ 02:49 29 January 2009

Hey why are people voting for me to be banned? I didn't do anything, I think its a joke but I am not sure ~SirTagstit • VFH • NotM • PEEING • CPT • RotM • BFF 16:12, 29 January 2009 (UTC)

{{USERNAME}} ~Orian57~ ~Talk~ 16:13 29 January 2009

No fucking way did I fall for it? Wowwww I suck, thanks Orian ~SirTagstit • VFH • NotM • PEEING • CPT • RotM • BFF 16:18, 29 January 2009 (UTC)

I did too to be fair. ~Orian57~ ~Talk~ 16:30 29 January 2009

Ok good, I want to write an article but have no ideas. ~SirTagstit • VFH • NotM • PEEING • CPT • RotM • BFF 16:38, 29 January 2009 (UTC)

Try reading some other articles for inspiration. But avoid <insert name here>'s articles. That dude sucks. Oh, and Orian, I just liked Insomnia so much. I think I do like it better than Power Ranger? for reasons I cannot really identify. I just like Insomnia. —Sir SysRq (talk) 23:18, 29 January 2009 (UTC)

Will you vote for power ranger? anyway? ~Orian57~ ~Talk~ 23:20 29 January 2009

Does my new emo one have any potential?--~SirTagstit • VFH • NotM • PEEING • CPT • RotM • BFF 23:23, 29 January 2009 (UTC)

My friend, I have used all ten of my votes and I never cast a vote in haste. I didn't vote for it, but it wasn't because I didn't think it was funny. It was hilarious. I just have my list of what I think the top ten articles of 08 should be, plus my articles. =] Also, thanks for the double edit conflict, Tagstit. —Sir SysRq (talk) 23:25, 29 January 2009 (UTC)

No problem poppa --~SirTagstit • VFH • NotM • PEEING • CPT • RotM • BFF 23:26, 29 January 2009 (UTC)

First impression of your emo article: it's going exactly where I expect it to go. I mean, you've made it relatively funny, or at least as funny as it can be. You need to be unexpected when dealing with subjects like this. Perhaps I could suggest Abortion or George W. Bush as examples of "controversial" subjects that are written in unexpected ways. —Sir SysRq (talk) 23:31, 29 January 2009 (UTC)

Oh ya, *poke* on that pee review. And thanks on the references. I am going to finish it and see how it runs in pee. Thanks!~SirTagstit • VFH • NotM • PEEING • CPT • RotM • BFF 23:33, 29 January 2009 (UTC)

I'm too busy chasing tail to finish a goddamn review. Fuck. (Yeah, I'll do it soon.) —Sir SysRq (talk) 23:45, 29 January 2009 (UTC)

I am sorry sir ~SirTagstit • VFH • NotM • PEEING • CPT • RotM • BFF 23:54, 29 January 2009 (UTC)

Would you swap insomnia for 'Power Ranger?'? It's just it's in danger of missing the top ten. I'd just like to make it more safe. Like UU my ego wouldn't survive. ~Orian57~ ~Talk~ 01:20 30 January 2009

I voted for Power Rangers...third one, your welcome ~SirTagstit • VFH • NotM • PEEING • CPT • RotM • BFF 01:35, 30 January 2009 (UTC)

Oh yeah! Yeah, I noticed that actually, and you must have actually liked it. While we're here what did you like about it? I'm still trying to figure out why it was such a hit. ~Orian57~ ~Talk~ 01:38 30 January 2009

Emo Article

I like this one! I think there are some things wrong, but if you read it slowly...idk I just like this one more than any others I have written so far. Not trying to brag, just wanted to know if you got anything to say before it goes into pee. ~SirTagstit • VFH • NotM • PEEING • CPT • RotM • BFF 01:10, 30 January 2009 (UTC)

I really don't have much to say other than what has already been said. I think your concept is weak. If you want to make a truly great article, a featurable article, try working out a new concept. I know you probably don't want to hear that, because you like what you have, and rewriting would be much more work than just making minor tweaks. But I really think that a new idea, something people don't expect, like having emos be popular and involved in their community and stuff, or perhaps they are government employees devoted to road work, then you could have a really funny article. But if you want a second opinion, take it to pee review and get a full review. On a side note, that review WILL be done tomorrow. I swear. —Sir SysRq (talk) 02:27, 30 January 2009 (UTC)

I fuckin' swear the whole cunting time but that doesn't mean I do any fuckin' work ya twat. ~Orian57~ ~Talk~ 02:30 30 January 2009

Dun cus a me kefin —Sir SysRq (talk) 02:47, 30 January 2009 (UTC)

What the fuck did you just call me? call me a cunt wouldya I'll fuckin' break your cunting face in with a fucking brick or somethun. ~Orian57~ ~Talk~ 02:50 30 January 2009

Thats a good idea. I like both of those. I will submit this just because it is done and if some people like it I will run with it but I will definitely work out a better concept for next time. Thanks! Sorry I ask you so many things. ~SirTagstit • VFH • NotM • PEEING • CPT • RotM • BFF 02:57, 30 January 2009 (UTC)

You're supposed to ask me questions, you're my noob. I'm here to help. =] Good luck at Pee. —Sir SysRq (talk) 13:58, 30 January 2009 (UTC)

On the Pee Review that "that review WILL be done tomorrow. I swear."...*POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE* *POKE*

UnSignpost 22 7 ( 1) January

The Uncyclopedia UnSignpost

The Newspaper Made Entirely From Recycled Internet Memes

January 22 7, 2009 • Issue 32 • Th-the m-m-most con-confident new-Newspaper in a wh-while

Zionists consolidate wiki power By The rather nervous junior horoscope writer accidentally promoted to editor in chief Yeah the st-story is, erm, about Mr Mor-Mordillo’s erm asce-ascent—rise to new power. He was, eh, pr-promoted to erm, Be-Beu- Bureaucrat? Which, erm, me-means he can- can now do- do th-things he cou-couldn’t d-d-do b-before; Kind-kind of like m-my pro-pro-promotion. Heh-heh, th-that was a j-jo-joke. S-some Un-Uncyclope-Uncyclopedians th-think this p-p-proves s-s-s-something abou-about so-some s-sort of J-Je-Jewish, erm, conspiracy. Or-or something, I-I’m n-not really sh-sh-sure why that was meant to be funny. Pro-pro-probably was-was-wasn’t. So-sorry. Th-the decision ca-came about b-b-because of th-the fuh-fuh-forum voting process in-in-initiated b-by Under—Under user wh-who was u-u-upset tha-that Bureaucrat C-C-Codeine had decided to leave. After s-some ti-time voting it-it was d-d-decided that Mordillo w-w-would become a Bureaucrat and that C-C-C-Codeine wasn’t leaving a-a-after all! Which was g-g-good. M-M-Mordillo di-didn’t ma-make a c-c-comment s-so I-I’ve b-been told t-to make one u-up. Erm, “Ha ha ha! N-Now you-you’re all un-under my thumb!” Or something, that that wasn’t really f-funny ei-either. Sorry, M-Mordillo, it-it’s not my W-words! Image:Do a jailbait.jpg Determined to be a Shemale By Mnbvcxz and Orian57 To the relief of Uncyclopedians everywhere, notorious image "Do a jailbait" has been scientifically proven not be a girl. Originally, many suspected that the disturbing and disturbingly attractive image was that of young girl: age estimates ranging from jail bait age down to "pedo-bear approves" age. However, due to much "research" on the internet regarding the appearance shemales who are just over the age of consent, it has been determined that said image was in fact a young shemale. Researchers said the hairy arms and the huge penis of the lady in question proved without reasonable doubt that the image can not be that of a girl. Many in the Uncyclopedia community were relived by the news. Orian57 in particular who stated the child was “quite sexy.”, on the image talk page, was relieved to find he could no longer be considered bisexual. Some worry about the continuing freedom of Sockpuppet of an unregistered user after his comment: “I don't care. Me wanna rape!”

Check out these pages! Think of the Grues, won't someone please think of the Grues? Looks like the cool and sexy admins IP is back under another different name then Virtually nothing From our logs: 19:48, 22 January 2009 TheLedBalloon (Talk | contribs) blocked Jeus (Talk | contribs) with an expiry time of 2 weeks ‎ (And the Lord said, "Let there be bannination," and there was bannination, and one more asshat was kept off of the wiki, and the Lord looked and he saw that it was good.) 03:30, 19 January 2009 TheLedBalloon (Talk | contribs) blocked 98.27.241.181 (Talk) with an expiry time of 1 day ‎ (Blanking talk pages is annoying. Your inability to take a joke is even more annoying. The fact that you haven't yet been banned for either is the most annoying of all. I can fix one of those.) 02:47, 19 January 2009 RAHB (Talk | contribs) blocked CANIHASTHISPLEEZ (Talk | contribs) with an expiry time of 3 months ‎ (Looks like somebody needs to get a life. This nice little ban will keep Uncyclopedia from getting in the way of that.) Biopic of the Week To some, a meaningless jumble of letters, Mnbvcxz is much, much more than that. In fact, he's much, much more than you could possibly imagine. In fact, he's so much more that trying to explain it in a small box in a wiki newspaper is futile, particularly if you spend so much time explaining that you can't explain his awesomeness that you leave yourself little space to try. Still, he reviews, categorises, helps out and does stuff. But that's only the tip of the iceberg that is Mnbvcxz! Reason why the UnSignpost is a week late of the fortnight The editor was busy, and totally lacked inspiration. Want to make sure the paper is on time next week? Give us a story in the press room! Cajek ban of the fortnight 05:21, 19 January 2009 RAHB (Talk | contribs) blocked Cajek (Talk | contribs) with an expiry time of a spanking ‎ (20 bans in August, 9 in September, 10 in October, Just 2 in December and 2 in January. Disgraceful.)

UnSignpost Main Page • Contact the Editors • Sign Up for Delivery • Get the Userbox

MrN9001 02:34, 31 January 2009 (UTC)

Thanks!

For voting Why?:Am I a Power Ranger? into the top ten articles of 2008! Have fun! ~Orian57~ ~Talk~ 23:51 1 February 2009

yes, Yes, YES!

Nothing earthshattering, but I wanted to stop by and say thank you for your vote for me on Uncyclopedia:Potatochopper of the Year. Seriously, it was really nice that you took the time. Dame GUN PotY WotM 2xPotM 17xVFH VFP Poo PMS •YAP• 02:32, 2 February 2009 (UTC)

hey mate

You like my writing, right? Well I think this is me at some of my best. What do you think? ~Orian57~ ~Talk~ 11:31 2 February 2009

Give me until the end of the day and I will read it. Have you read mine yet? —Sir SysRq (talk) 21:33, 2 February 2009 (UTC)

How bout mine! I like the story but the humor needs a tune up especially in the first few chapters. It isn't done yet but any help at all would be much appreciated! Like directions it could go and so on. ~SirTagstit • VFH • NotM • PEEING • CPT • RotM • BFF 21:42, 2 February 2009 (UTC)

I'll look at that one too. If you're stuck for something to do, however, perhaps giving daddy a little love could be a good way to pass the time. —Sir SysRq (talk) 21:46, 2 February 2009 (UTC)

Of course! I am reviewing both of yours. I will be done by tonight. ~SirTagstit • VFH • NotM • PEEING • CPT • RotM • BFF 21:48, 2 February 2009 (UTC)

Awesome. I'll see if I can't review either of these articles today, if not then tomorrow. You know me and my reviewing habits. —Sir SysRq (talk) 21:50, 2 February 2009 (UTC)

Or lack there of... ~SirTagstit • VFH • NotM • PEEING • CPT • RotM • BFF 21:54, 2 February 2009 (UTC)

Fucker, you don't chide me. This is a one way street, my friend: I make fun of you, you serve as my straight man and just look pretty. —Sir SysRq (talk) 21:58, 2 February 2009 (UTC)

lol that joke works on many levels. ~Orian57~ ~Talk~ 22:02 2 February 2009

What is a chide? ~SirTagstit • VFH • NotM • PEEING • CPT • RotM • BFF 22:04, 2 February 2009 (UTC)

"To chide" means "to scold mildly so as to correct or improve" or something like that, you get the idea. -Sockpuppet of an unregistered user 22:08, 2 February 2009 (UTC)

Chides are small green shoots with a flavor resembling onions. I fucking hate em. Keep em out of my soup, Tags. —Sir SysRq (talk) 22:11, 2 February 2009 (UTC)

Yes, what SysRq said. I was way off. -Sockpuppet of an unregistered user 22:15, 2 February 2009 (UTC)

HAHAHHAHAHA IT LOOKS LIKE CHODES! damn im funny. ~SirTagstit • VFH • NotM • PEEING • CPT • RotM • BFF 22:16, 2 February 2009 (UTC)

Got a rhyme for your uncle Willie

Then I hit him in the head with a billy

Willie, Willie, watch your mouth

And fuck the South

There's yer words of wisdom for today. Anyone who identifies the source gets one 3 liter bottle of Faygo. (it's only a buck ten) —Sir SysRq (talk) 22:20, 2 February 2009 (UTC)

Drive-by without indenting: Just had a quick look over your article Sys - scared the crap out of me, how will I sleep tonight? Yeah, I like it, although I don't think you go far enough with it. As this is only a drive-by, I won't go into detail, but I'd say you're rocking on maybe a seven or eight here, but you need to go up to eleven! A quick glance at Orian's latest opus next, I feel. Toodles! --UU - natter 22:28, Feb 2

Dont be afraid to give mine a quick look either UU! Oh ya done on your review Sys...now for Orian...~SirTagstit • VFH • NotM • PEEING • CPT • RotM • BFF 22:43, 2 February 2009 (UTC)

Don't worry, I was on my way - this little spate of creativity here bodes well for VFH when the Top 10 extravaganza finishes. I'm a sucker for anything with monkeys in, and this was... different. Good different, I think, although it could have been bad. There's a fine line between clever and stupid (oh crikey, that remark, the comment on Sys's article above, anyone would think I'd just watched Spinal Tap recently or something. Wait - I have. Well, that's alright then). I liked it on the whole, although like Orian's, it could stand a small proofread. A full review should throw up a few things to tweak, but I'd say it's well on the way, and an interesting idea. This has been quite a decent evening, I've read several promising new articles, and enjoyed 'em. I like evenings like this! --UU - natter 22:52, Feb 2

Thanks muchly, UU! I have yet to give these articles good readthroughs (as I am currently dealing with some rather insane members of the opposite sex) but I plan to later. And now, I have a nice review to read from young Tagstit. —Sir SysRq (talk) 23:17, 2 February 2009 (UTC)

Spinal Tap references? I heard Spinal Tap references, dammit! Great movie btw. Have you watched it with the commentary yet? - T.L.B. WotM, UotM, FPrize, AotM, ANotM, PLS, UN:HS, GUN 00:05, Feb 3

It's gonna fuck you with that

And if you're a sewer skank, lemme hit that

Violent J ain't even one to fake it

I wanna see some folded up skank bitches naked

Pure poetry. —Sir SysRq (talk) 02:45, 3 February 2009 (UTC)

You just can't top Sex Farm:

Workin' on a sex farm

Tryin' to raise some hard love

Gettin' out my pitch fork

Poking your hay

Now those are lyrics. - T.L.B. WotM, UotM, FPrize, AotM, ANotM, PLS, UN:HS, GUN 04:21, Feb 3

/me runs randomly across the chatroom naked

Aieeeeeeee... *is out again* -- Luverly - (Contribs) (Talk) Grammar Nazi, Mum , BFF & NotM, CUN , GMP . - 16:16, 3 Feb

Wow sissy, did you see that? Even I was slightly impressed! ~Orian57~ ~Talk~ 16:58 3 February 2009

Meh. - [17:22 3 February 2009] YYettie

Okay so it's a talk page and not a chatroom, but meh. I'm home feverish and with a flu. It sorta got to my brain, I think... -- Luverly - (Contribs) (Talk) Grammar Nazi, Mum , BFF & NotM, CUN , GMP . - 19:04, 3 Feb

Oh I have one of those, they're horrible. ~Orian57~ ~Talk~ 19:06 3 February 2009

I'm sooo gonna call in sick in the morning and go see a doctor. And a doctor of medicine, not psychology... Just to make that clear. I like random nudity. Especially if it involves a shower, massage, sauna or putting on some clean clothes... Red silk FTW... ;) -- Luverly - (Contribs) (Talk) Grammar Nazi, Mum , BFF & NotM, CUN , GMP . - 19:22, 3 Feb

HAI LUVVY && HAI LUVVY'S BOOBIES —Sir SysRq (talk) 19:40, 3 February 2009 (UTC)

/me waves... Hai SysRq :P -- Luverly - (Contribs) (Talk) Grammar Nazi, Mum , BFF & NotM, CUN , GMP . - 22:49, 3 Feb

What have you been up to? We've missed you, and your voting abilities. —Sir SysRq (talk) 22:55, 3 February 2009 (UTC)

Your writing abilites haven't dropped so low you need to whore for my vote on your own talk page, have they?! -- Luverly - (Contribs) (Talk) Grammar Nazi, Mum , BFF & NotM, CUN , GMP . - 22:58, 3 Feb

Apparently they have. I haven't had a feature in a while. —Sir SysRq (talk) 23:01, 3 February 2009 (UTC)

pee review guidelines

I did actually have the pee review guidelines open while I was doing the pee reviews, however I am very new to the process. Maybe the guidelines should mention 2 sentences or more (3? 5?) for each line for in depth reviews. Also I wasn't sure at the time what you meant by PEEING members, but I think I know now.(I'm better at reviewing articles that need a lot more improvement than I am at reviewing already great articles.) I thought the article you made was an Unnews article, due to its format and lack of sub-headers. -- Simsilikesims(♀GUN) Talk here. 19:03, 3 February 2009 (UTC)

Usually, the titles of UnNews articles begin with the prefix "UnNews". And even 5 sentences for a review is considered to be rather sparce. I usually write a good 3 or so paragraphs for the humor and concept sections. Try looking at some other PEEING reviewers, specifically Steel Kidneys, and their reviews. —Sir SysRq (talk) 19:42, 3 February 2009 (UTC)

You could maybe take a look at this gem-masterpiece of a review. - [19:58 3 February 2009] YYettie

Well, Yettie is exceptional. —Sir SysRq (talk) 22:02, 3 February 2009 (UTC)

I'm sexy that's what I am. - [22:14 3 February 2009] YYettie

I'm the sexy one and you know it! -- Luverly - (Contribs) (Talk) Grammar Nazi, Mum , BFF & NotM, CUN , GMP . - 22:52, 3 Feb

What's important is that Yettie has a penis. —Sir SysRq (talk) 22:56, 3 February 2009 (UTC)

And that I'm sexy. - [08:52 4 February 2009] YYettie

Who needs a penis when you've got battery powered orgasms..? But I'll humour you guys and say penis = sexy :) -- Luverly - (Contribs) (Talk) Grammar Nazi, Mum , BFF & NotM, CUN , GMP . - 11:07, 4 Feb

BATTERY POWERED?! That's funny, my orgasms, well to be more correct, my penis, is powered by a twin turbo-charged V8 with 6 exhaust pipes. - [12:31 4 February 2009] YYettie

Ohai!

How the hell are ya dude? -OptyC Sucks! CUN23:03, 3 Feb

HOSHIT IT'S OPTYC! Heyy buddy, long time no see! Let me get you a beverage! Sit down! Let's play twenty questions! Why yes, I am a fluffy brownie! You're so good at that game. I can't fool you. I love you. —Sir SysRq (talk) 23:05, 3 February 2009 (UTC)

I love you too man! So; what's new? What have I missed these past few months? What's the latest IRC meme? And most importantly, what's that in your pocket? -OptyC Sucks! CUN23:10, 3 Feb

This. This. This. This. —Sir SysRq (talk) 23:14, 3 February 2009 (UTC)

Congrats. You're a fucking machine! You may insert your own innuendo. LOLinsert -OptyC Sucks! CUN23:24, 3 Feb

Congrats for what? Oh, winning WotM and getting one of the Top 10 articles of 08 since I last spoke to you. Thank you. —Sir SysRq (talk) 23:26, 3 February 2009 (UTC)

Does this mean I have to call you sir when asking for sex now? -OptyC Sucks! CUN23:32, 3 Feb

Only if you wanna really turn me on. —Sir SysRq (talk) 23:41, 3 February 2009 (UTC)

I am in the room you know. Also hi Opty C! Also Whoring. ~Orian57~ ~Talk~ 00:12 4 February 2009

It's actually very funny. Vote for it. —Sir SysRq (talk) 00:32, 4 February 2009 (UTC)

I second that motion! ~Orian57~ ~Talk~ 00:33 4 February 2009

OPTY! - [08:51 4 February 2009] YYettie

Jumping on the "Use somebody's talkpages to say hi to somebody else" bandwagon. Hi Orian; how you been? Hey Yettie; still got that rash? -OptyC Sucks! CUN22:55, 4 Feb

The rustling of the leaves

The trees are sweetly asking

"Why are you still here?"

—Sir SysRq (talk) 22:58, 4 February 2009 (UTC)

Christ; I've been back for two days and you're already insinuating I should leave? Where'd I leave my razor blades... -OptyC Sucks! CUN23:07, 4 Feb

The love of the goose

I weep at her migration

But what a sweet ass

—Sir SysRq (talk) 23:14, 4 February 2009 (UTC)

You've inspired me! *ahem*

My navel is swollen

Flatus wafts on summer breeze

Uncyc is the worst

-OptyC Sucks! CUN23:19, 4 Feb

Perhaps this stillness

This, the most quiet of nights

Haiku gets me laid

—Sir SysRq (talk) 23:35, 4 February 2009 (UTC)

The woe of the swan

Time moves like tides, unending

SysRq is teh ghey

-OptyC Sucks! CUN23:42, 4 Feb

Glides over the sea

He makes his own destiny

Blow it out your ass

—Sir SysRq (talk) 23:49, 4 February 2009 (UTC)

Knowledge will free you

Lessons come at a high price

Vaseline tastes bad

-OptyC Sucks! CUN23:56, 4 Feb

Welts remind you of

The wisdom of the father:

Alcoholism

—Sir SysRq (talk) 00:00, 5 February 2009 (UTC)

This beer is warm; flat

Get me another one bitch

Do some dishes too

-I miss mommy

RAPE!

Your talk page is about to get one massive raping...and...what's that?

You say I can't rape your talk page, just because I'm 24 headers late? Poppycock! I shall rape your talkpage as I see fit. /me returns to the rape at hand - [22:20 4 February 2009] YYettie

In other news your userpage is looking bwootiful. - [22:20 4 February 2009] YYettie

Wouldn't you need a penis to rape anything? -Sockpuppet of an unregistered user 22:23, 4 February 2009 (UTC)

Not only is he raping you but he is humiliating you too. ~Orian57~ ~Talk~ 22:24 4 February 2009

I saw that. What an asshole. And yes, my userpage is always looking pretty, as is my status box which now matches the rest. =] —Sir SysRq (talk) 22:28, 4 February 2009 (UTC)

I think it should be the law that you have to put IDEA FROM YETTIE on you status box in huge, brightly coloured letters. :P And yes, humiliating and raping is my kinda fun. - [07:35 5 February 2009] YYettie

Your sick. Now where's that e-mail you promised? ~Orian57~ ~Talk~ 07:36 5 February 2009

UnSignpost 5th February 2009

The Uncyclopedia UnSignpost

The Newspaper Whose Mum Said It Was Cool!

February 5, 2009 • Issue 33 • It's Journalism Jim, but not as we know it.

The ‘of the Year’ run down of the year! By Orian57 So after a long neurotic month of blatant prostitution, secret e-mail canvassing, bribery and coercion in deciding who should win the various ‘of the Year’ awards (plus a completely normal five days of knowing who did) the results are in! UotY: Mordillo! Nominated (but not voted for) by UU with the reason “[he does] the big bad wolf stuff to keep fuckwits at bay.”. 21 Jew jokes later (“Jew that controls the internet”, “I feel I have to vote for him” and “I love this man. To the point that his girlfriend is seriously distraught by it”) Mordillo was the landslide victor a whole 12 votes ahead of the runner up, UU! And he deserved it too (though to be frank I deserved it more)! Our WotY was Modusoperandi! Narrowly beating Mhaille by 2 votes he was nominated by UU with the reasoning “…Tends to brighten my day whenever I see him, although that could be the light reflecting off his gleaming naked body.” Another 19 Canadian jokes ( “this silly Canadian”, “I never would have thought that casting a vote would be so painful as this” and “Modus is like maple syrup. On the outside he's all golden, sweet and sticky. On the inside however, he's all golden, sweet and sticky”) won him the award! (though to be frank I would have appreciated it more!) Next up was our winner of PotY, Prettiestpretty! She was nominated (but not voted for) by Mhaille because she is the “producer of some very impressive work” and has won the PotM twice! 18 girl jokes later (“such a foregone conclusion”, “She's earned this and then some” and “Unlike most people here, I'm actually going to give a reason for voting for PP. I'm even going to write two sentences explaining the reason.”) she deservedly won the award which she herself designed. (I don’t even know how to use MS paint but I’d still like to have been acknowledged). There was also an impromptu N00b of the Year award created that Rcmurphy ran off with. He was nominated by Spang with the reason “He really deserves it this time” and received 12 N00b jks (“How can you be a year old and still be a noob without being rcmurphy”, “He's still confused too” and “[Hyperbole is] regularly here and dangerously competent. Rc remains the quintessential n00b”). (*grumble* I started lurking in 2007…) Lastly and leastly there was the UGotY which was awarded to Wikia. Nominated by Mhaille with the reason “Wikia continue to raise the bar on defining what it means to be a Useless Gobshite”. He/she/it got 5 jokes that I don’t properly understand (“As much as I'd like to see Yettie take this, Wikia is both more useless and far more of a gobshite”, “it's rare to see such dedication to gobshitery” and “Outstanding contributions to fail.”). (Ok so I’m not bitter about loosing this.)

Check out these pages! Penis Pants Er, fox? From our logs: 1:33, 2 February 2009 Flyingfeline (Talk | contribs) blocked 81.169.166.86 (Talk) with an expiry time of 1 day ‎ (Oh, brilliant. Well, that's going to be fun for both of us. I wonder who'll get bored first?) 04:39, 31 January 2009 TheLedBalloon (Talk | contribs) blocked 72.138.52.153 (Talk) with an expiry time of 3 months ‎ (Hey there! Remember me? I was the admin that asked you to stop failing so hard back in October. Now I'm asking again, but with a ban length 12 times longer.) 18:16, 29 January 2009 Codeine (Talk | contribs) blocked Sej (Talk | contribs) with an expiry time of Judgement Day ‎ ("And He saw the work, and He was sore displeased; and He did smite the n00b with all his wrath". Book of Codeine, ch. 6, vs 9) Biopic of the Week YesTimeToEdit Commonly known as Yettie, he won N00b of the Month back in April 08 after writing a featured UnNews. He went on a crusade to gave us all more things not to care about than we can handle. Following another feature he deservedly won UGotM. There has also been some recent confusion about his gender. Cajek ban of the week 04:48, 31 January 2009 TheLedBalloon (Talk | contribs) blocked Cajek (Talk | contribs) with an expiry time of 28 minutes ‎ (Apparently the UnSignpost has a 'Cajek ban of the week' section. This is my week!) Custom box #3 This box is empty. Imagine something nice here like a Caribbean holiday, getting sand in your shoes and arse crack while being blistered by sun you weren't made to handle and pretending to enjoy yourself.

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9001(bot)  03:18, Feb 5

So it's a poem you want huh?

Well, this talk page has been getting rather poetic lately, so I decided to share my own with everyone. It is so good, it got it's own header.

Jack and Jill went up the hill

to get some marijuana

Jack got high, unzipped his fly

and asked "Jill do you wanna?"

Jill said yes and dropped her dress

and then they had some fun.

But silly Jill forgot her pill

and now they have a son.

—The preceding unsigned comment was added by Tagstit (talk • contribs)

Lyrical magic,

Sweet gift of the written word

Sign your comments, noob.

—Sir SysRq (talk) 20:25, 7 February 2009 (UTC)

The tilde, respect

The comments you must own, 'tard

SysRq is still ghey

-OptyC Sucks! CUN20:41, 7 Feb

Round and soft, I love

To watch them bounce. Yes, of course,

I speak of titties.

—Sir SysRq (talk) 20:44, 7 February 2009 (UTC)

Irony abounds

Repeatedly calling Sys

Ghey in poem form

What? Poetry's not gay!

You still glad I'm back? :D -OptyC Sucks! CUN20:52, 7 Feb

You're back? —Sir SysRq (talk) 22:55, 7 February 2009 (UTC)

GASP!

Ooo... I'm so popular even you had to vandalise my user page, huh? :D -- Luverly - (Contribs) (Talk) Grammar Nazi, Mum , BFF & NotM, CUN , GMP . - 20:54, 7 Feb

I just made your page

More hip and with the times, kid.

I made haiku cool.

—Sir SysRq (talk) 22:56, 7 February 2009 (UTC)

My Article

Alright, I am really stuck with my Diary of Monkey Lover. I want to make it like a cliche drama high school drama set up. Like, he likes this one monkey who is sweet, but then he is tempted by a hot monkey. Then he tries to throw it all off and pretend it didn't happen but the hot monkey has a big dumb brute of a boyfriend, or a gorilla. Then everything is revealed and the sweet monkey is hurt. Most of the time the boy and sweet girl work it out, but here, since they are just monkeys, she just beats his head open. I really need help in writing and adding some funny littler jokes in the beginning. Could you possibly help me write a bit of that if you have time? ~SirTagstit • VFH • NotM • PEEING • CPT • RotM • BFF 04:21, 8 February 2009 (UTC)

I promise you I will read this article of your's and I'll try and help, it sounds liek you have a fantastic idea. ~Orian57~ ~Talk~ 08:18 8 February 2009

Thanks alot Orian. I am also looking for a few religious jokes in the first two sections to keep the story going. It doesn't have to be religious, anthing works really. I also need help in the bulk of the book so it is funnier and easier to read. I am really trying to go all out on this one. ~SirTagstit • VFH • NotM • PEEING • CPT • RotM • BFF 17:32, 8 February 2009 (UTC)

SYS! I am bored. ~SirTagstit • VFH • NotM • PEEING • CPT • RotM • BFF 19:42, 8 February 2009 (UTC)

Oh, look. I'm back. Yeah, let me take some more time reading your article and I may have some more suggestions for you. —Sir SysRq (talk) 20:14, 8 February 2009 (UTC)

SysRq and/or Orian

It's me again. My newest article is going to be an unscript. I am going to be making it based off of Ocean's 11 12 and 13. Before I really get into it though, I want some help. It will be called Ocean's 14 and so, as the name suggests, I will have to have one new character. I am stuck on what to make him though. Should I make him really stupid and describe him as the one modern people connect with. I found this predictable and often used in unscripts but it is also tried and true and ends up funny, most of the time. I also thought maybe he could be like this really crazy guy who is overally enthusiastic about everything Danny Ocean says. Kind of like a kissass. This might work. Also, a final idea I had was to make him just a normal thief guy, but that doesn't sound as exciting or funny. Thats about it though. Also, I am debating on whether having them try to steal something funny, or try to steal something serious in a funny way. Either way works. Any suggestions? ~SirTagstit • VFH • NotM • PEEING • CPT • RotM • BFF 00:41, 9 February 2009 (UTC)

Alternatively, you could make Ocean's 146, and introduce 133 new characters. pillow talk 00:02, 9 February 2009 (UTC)

How about this...there was a contest for fans of the Ocean's 11 series and the winner gets to be the new character in Ocean's 14. So your new character is an inexperienced actor/fanboy who gushes throughout the entire movie. That could be your angle, and you could bring in jokes from there. I've never seen any of them, so I wouldn't be the one to come to for advice on this one. On the other hand, perhaps my unfamiliarity with the films makes me perfect for helping you make it relatable to people who haven't seen them. And I'm sure if Orian were here, he would say something like "cocks!" and be relatively unhelpful. —Sir SysRq (talk) 00:57, 9 February 2009 (UTC)

Oh I like that idea. It would be perfect for a nerdy little teenager or something like that who is really into the whole thing. What they normally steal is something REALLY expensive from somene of really high power. Do you think they should steal something small and stupid or something expensive but in a funny way? ~SirTagstit • VFH • NotM • PEEING • CPT • RotM • BFF 01:00, 9 February 2009 (UTC)

That could be one way to go, and you could make it really funny. I think South Park did an episode where a bunch of professional thieves robbed a Burger King or something and they made it pretty funny by over-dramaticizing it. However, you could also go for something obscene or impossible. Perhaps they want to steal the world. (Not rule the world, not control it, just steal it and sell it on the streets) Perhaps they want to steal all of the world's money at once, as in rob every bank, business, individual, and government in the world, simultaneously. Whatever you decide to do is fine, so long as you're able to execute. I just wanna get you thinking a little differently, since some of your ideas have been a little straight forward. I like weird humor, stuff that makes me think, stuff that I haven't seen before if you catch my drift. But like I said, I'm more worried about your execution than your ideas right now. I hope you found some of these ideas to be at least thought provoking. —Sir SysRq (talk) 01:12, 9 February 2009 (UTC)

Ya all those ideas are great! I will definitely think about them a bit before I really start writing it. I hope I execute it ok!~SirTagstit • VFH • NotM • PEEING • CPT • RotM • BFF 01:17, 9 February 2009 (UTC)

One of the things I like to do when I have an idea is outline it. I can jot down all of the ideas that I like as they come to me, and then develop them in bulleted form so that I can see where each one will lead. You may want to try this too. That way you'll be able to come back to your ideas later when you're writing, making it easier to structure. —Sir SysRq (talk) 01:20, 9 February 2009 (UTC)

Alright, I will try that this time to see if it works for me. ~SirTagstit • VFH • NotM • PEEING • CPT • RotM • BFF 01:23, 9 February 2009 (UTC)

Groovy. And if it doesn't, it's no big deal, different strokes y'know. I would spend tonight just organizing your ideas and then get back to me with your outline so I can see how effective that is. Do you use Google Docs? —Sir SysRq (talk) 01:26, 9 February 2009 (UTC)

Mmm, somewhat. Why? ~SirTagstit • VFH • NotM • PEEING • CPT • RotM • BFF 01:27, 9 February 2009 (UTC)

Special:Emailuser me your email address and I'll show you one of my outlines so you can get an idea for how they are applied to Uncyclopedia articles. I still have my outline for George W. Bush's Weekly Presidential Address: Week of January 25th, 2009 if you wanted to see it. —Sir SysRq (talk) 01:35, 9 February 2009 (UTC)

Ya sure I would like to see that. ~SirTagstit • VFH • NotM • PEEING • CPT • RotM • BFF 01:38, 9 February 2009 (UTC)

Go ahead and email me with your email address so I can enable sharing on Google Docs. —Sir SysRq (talk) 01:45, 9 February 2009 (UTC)

You should post that on-wiki! It'd be cool to see where your article ideas come from, I think, and we could even possibly get some other folks to show their outlines. I haven't written an outline in while, just because I've either done my outlining in my userspace(usually just puking up an idea and sticking it in a subpage), or because my idea came in the shower. All cliches aside, I actually get a lot of uncyclopedia ideas while bathing. I think that was where I got my walls idea, actually... Also: this isn't my talkpage. It's way more colorful. - T.L.B. WotM, UotM, FPrize, AotM, ANotM, PLS, UN:HS, GUN 01:48, Feb 9

That may actually be easier. Here it is. —Sir SysRq (talk) 01:54, 9 February 2009 (UTC)

How do I email you? Whats your address? And I also think I should wrap up my monkey book before continuing on another maybe. ~SirTagstit • VFH • NotM • PEEING • CPT • RotM • BFF 01:59, 9 February 2009 (UTC)

This is how you email any user on the site; just replace my name in that link with someone else's to email them. (Example: [[Special:Emailuser/Orian57]] would get you an email form to Orian.) But I already posted my outline up on the wiki so there's no need now. —Sir SysRq (talk) 02:02, 9 February 2009 (UTC)

Ah, so that's how you go about it. See, I tend to start with an idea, and just come up with a page around that one idea, sort of like what I did with this, which has grown into this almost-done article. - T.L.B. WotM, UotM, FPrize, AotM, ANotM, PLS, UN:HS, GUN 02:12, Feb 9

"Not to mention the.....DUUUUUURRRRRRGGGGHHH" = Feature! —Sir SysRq (talk) 02:16, 9 February 2009 (UTC)

I should have totally left it like that. Strokes make for kickass transitions. - T.L.B. WotM, UotM, FPrize, AotM, ANotM, PLS, UN:HS, GUN 02:21, Feb 9

Coincidentally, so do references to So I Married An Axe Murderer. "She is a thief, she stole my heart...and my cat." Ah, I miss the 90s. Wait, no I don't. Dammit, now I look like an idiot. This is just like the time I told this girl I wanted to be a rainbow. —Sir SysRq (talk) 02:31, 9 February 2009 (UTC)

Alright my outline is done! You can find it on my page under what I am working on. I hope it is good! Any tweak would help! ~SirTagstit • VFH • NotM • PEEING • CPT • RotM • BFF 08:10, 9 February 2009 (UTC)

UnSignpost 12th February 2009

The Uncyclopedia UnSignpost

The Newspaper That Won't Judge You!

February 12, 2009 • Issue 34 • Mainlining news direct to your talk page artery

Worrying influx of n00bs a threat to Uncyc's "worst" status By UU How can you resist my n00b power of cuteness? After the flow of n00bs slowed to a trickle at the tail end of 2008, 2009 has seen the site experiencing a veritable tidal wave of new editors, enthusiastically bounding around the site like wide-eyed puppies that have yet to meet Olipro, tramping mud into the carpet, and leaving half-eaten IPs on the floor of the Village Dump. Worse still, many of these new arrivals show early signs of being dangerously competent: writing funny articles; giving in-depth pee reviews; voting on stuff; helping folks out - generally making the kind of contributions that could, if the community is not careful, lead to the site losing its coveted "worst" status. Experienced editors queued up to condemn the invasion - "Very happy to see the influx in good new editors coming in, we've been devoid of that extra boost for far too long it seems" said RAHB, the bile seething from his every pore, while MrN spoke scathingly about "great additions to Uncyc". But is it too late? With competition for the NOTM award at its most fierce for months (4 noms and none of them Rcmurphy at the last count), it looks like it may be too late to reject this transfusion of new blood. Is there any hope for the long-term future of the proud traditions of the wiki under this relentless onslaught of new talent? A comment on Bullshit from MrN As a well known protagonist of the noble and honourable art of bullshitting I felt it my place to speak out regarding this most tricky of issues. Much has been said of late regarding the consistency, and texture of what we at Uncyc consider to be suitable for our beloved wiki. As you know, normal traditional (un-specified) crap we don't want, but there must always be room for more bullshit on Uncyclopedia. Some will no doubt consider my last comment to be horse shit, which (as you may know) has a slightly thicker consistency. The dilemma we must then face is how do we categorise and specify the fine (if rather smelly) line between what is crap and what is bullshit. The study of bull-crap may also been of concern to some readers, but I feel it not my place to enter that arena. This article stinks enough as it is. However... When considering bullshit, I feel it important to point out our rigorously defined guidelines regarding the use of bollocks as I feel many of the important principles apply. If I may quote: “Sometimes articles arrive at Articles for deletion which have only the most tenuous connection to reality: they are, to use a British term, Complete Bollocks. This is not always a bad thing.” ~ Uncyclopedia:Complete Bollocks I think that speaks for itself. Got it? So basically, we want more bullshit, some horse shit, and a liberal helping of complete bollocks. But NO CRAP. Unless it's crap which adds to the general stench of the article in question (assuming that stinking is what we want). Got it now? Well, look at it this way... There was a man who had three wives. No, that was Moses. Oh, so Moses comes down from Mount Sinai and says: "Well, lads. I got him down to ten, but adultery is still in." No wait. Sorry, that was complete bollocks. I'm drifting into the realms of pointless excrement, and what does this have to do with anything? Don't tell them that! So what was it I was talking about again? Oh, yea... Does anyone know where I left my slippers?

Check out these pages! Apparently, we had a "golden era" Only the Lonely Oh, it's nothing to do with marriage. I'm disappointed Random suggestion If we weren't on the internets, I'd say this was getting geeky From our logs: 13:25, 9 February 2009 Mordillo (Talk | contribs) blocked 67.71.123.168 (Talk) with an expiry time of 1 month ‎ (1 day for blanking, 1 week for blanking a featured, 2 weeks for blanking a top 10 and the rest is a bonus!) 02:46, 8 February 2009 Roman Dog Bird (Talk | contribs) blocked 97.83.236.223 (Talk) with an expiry time of Judgement Day ‎ (Fer the love of Christ, you make me think I actually have a life. You've been doing the same God damn thing since the summer. Just fuck off already.) 16:41, 7 February 2009 Mordillo (Talk | contribs) blocked Luvvy (Talk | contribs) with an expiry time of a purrr ‎ (And that's for flirting with another admin. Shame on you.) Biopic of the Week DrStrange is one of these here stellar n00bs that we're wittering on about in that there main article. He's been here for a bit over 2 months, and in that time has won NotM and already been nommed for WotM. At this rate, he'll be WotY by about June. Good job he's funny and good at writing things really, otherwise we'd be obliged to hate his precocious guts. Gender confirmation of the Week YesTimeToEdit astonished the Uncyclopedia community by admitting to being male. Orian57 continued in whale raping Yettie. SysRq consequently "won teh penis", granting him this most prized life-time achievement award. In the ensuing chaos, Sockpuppet of an unregistered user cut off Yettie's penis and went on a raping spree with it. Mnbvcxz still believed that Yettie was a girl and the latter declared his love and desire to be raped towards the former. SoaUU AKA Sockie admitted having a vagina, or did (s)he?... Mnbvcxz refused to give his/her gender... Will Yettie get his penis back? Who is pretending to be male and who is pretending to be female? Tune in next week! Same penis-time. Same penis-channel. Cajek ban smackdown of the week 02:53, 10 February 2009 TheLedBalloon (Talk | contribs) blocked Cajek (Talk | contribs) with an expiry time of a voyage made in less than twelve parsecs ‎ (You want a ban-off, RAHB!? BRING IT!) 00:46, 7 February 2009 RAHB (Talk | contribs) blocked Cajek (Talk | contribs) with an expiry time of a Kessel run ‎ (I shall not allow TheLedBalloon to dethrone my weekly Cajek-banning title!)

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9001(bot)  20:50, Feb 11

Congratz...well...sorta...

Just came by to congratulate you on your feature. Superb job. I do think it is a bigger achievement for me because I was the one who actually nominated it but its fine...no need to applaud me...but you can anyways if you want...just sayin ~SirTagstit • VFH • NotM • PEEING • CPT • RotM • BFF 03:10, 12 February 2009 (UTC)

CONGRATULATIONS TAGS ON NOMINATING AN ARTICLE THAT I WROTE AND WORKED HARD ON AND THAT YOU DID NO WORK ON. There, that better? =] —Sir SysRq (talk) 14:28, 12 February 2009 (UTC)

Awww...no...well...I guess I did help out alot so your welcome =) I am really proud of the work I did on that piece. ~SirTagstit • VFH • NotM • PEEING • CPT • RotM • BFF 15:16, 12 February 2009 (UTC)

Oh yeah, you did review it. I still get to call you "Baggins" though. —Sir SysRq (talk) 15:18, 12 February 2009 (UTC)

Why Baggins? ~SirTagstit • VFH • NotM • PEEING • CPT • RotM • BFF 15:20, 12 February 2009 (UTC)

Don't backsass me, Baggins. —Sir SysRq (talk) 15:22, 12 February 2009 (UTC)

K...well anyways I NEED HELP WIT MY SHIT DUDE! Can you look at my working on section and tell me what you think? ~SirTagstit • VFH • NotM • PEEING • CPT • RotM • BFF 15:25, 12 February 2009 (UTC)

Yessir. This class is almost over and so I won't have a computer to use so I'll have to do it when I get home. Yell at me in about four hours, kay? —Sir SysRq (talk) 15:33, 12 February 2009 (UTC)

Will do thanks man ~SirTagstit • VFH • NotM • PEEING • CPT • RotM • BFF 15:35, 12 February 2009 (UTC)

Thankies

Going Down? Necropaxx would like to thank you profusely for reading his article and actually liking it enough to vote For. The picture on the right is exactly what you wouldn't see in an elevator. Sorry. :(

Take a look at my userpage, there's something... familiar about it. :) • • • Necropaxx (T) {~} 17:23, Feb 12

Mine is more flamboyant. Oh wait, you addressed that. —Sir SysRq (talk) 20:23, 12 February 2009 (UTC)

GOD SAVE AMERICAAAA

'Twas but my pleasure to vote for George Bush to stay in office for another eight years, to defend our shores, to inflict democracy and help God free the world from tyrants and ward off evil nations like South... uh... North Kor... Korea. Anyway, I remember a few months back you wondered what the meaning was behind my username. I got it from the name of a underrated German electronica band, but the true allure to the name is the videogame reference. It means, literally, "Reloader", supposedly what Famicon consoles in Germany did during the warm up. Also, thanks for the advice on the web browsers. --Nachlader 22:05, 12 February 2009 (UTC)

No worries, mate. Thanks again. —Sir SysRq (talk) 23:13, 12 February 2009 (UTC)

Hey, its been four hours and you told me to remind you to take a look at my new stuff! So...*poke* ~SirTagstit • VFH • NotM • PEEING • CPT • RotM • BFF 23:36, 12 February 2009 (UTC)

I WILL DO IT. Also, use a new header (or recycle an old one) when talking about something that bears no relevance to the current header. Nao, you wanted me to look at the Monkey article or the Ocean's Fourteen article? —Sir SysRq (talk) 23:42, 12 February 2009 (UTC)

Well, ok, there are four things. I wanted to know what I could do further to improve the monkey book. I wanted to know if my ocean fourteen's outline was good and useful. I also wanted to know if the jokes I put into the article itself was good because I know some people haven't watched the movie so in doing so I made a few gay jokes and rascist jokes to help the story. Finally, I had an idea of Balloon animals being told as if they were going through evolution like people, and wanted to know if you liked the concept. Thanks dude! ~SirTagstit • VFH • NotM • PEEING • CPT • RotM • BFF 23:46, 12 February 2009 (UTC)

PIIICTURES!

Hey Sysrq I know I bother you alot but this time its important! First of all you still need to read my stuff and second...I made my first photoshop ever! Go to my page and click pictures to see it. It is by no means hilarious but it took me forever to perfect and im awefully proud of it! It is going into my User:Tagstit/Balloon Animals article. Tell me what you think! Orian Yettie and all other SysRq stalkers should look too and give me their opinion. ~SirTagstit • VFH • NotM • PEEING • CPT • RotM • BFF 07:28, 14 February 2009 (UTC)

Hey you're learning fast. It took my ages to realise that other people read other people's talk pages. Also I shall have a look see. ~Orian57~ ~Talk~ 07:31 14 February 2009

Alright thanks! By the way its looksy...maybe...looksie? Maybe it is look see and it is just the same verb meaning twice...hm...interesting... ~SirTagstit • VFH • NotM • PEEING • CPT • RotM • BFF 07:41, 14 February 2009 (UTC)

Uh hu, that is interesting. Also love the pic! ~Orian57~ ~Talk~ 07:45 14 February 2009

Really??? Awesome...I am really excited about it! I always wanted to make some original pictures for my articles and now I can. What is considered a featurable picture though? Because I looked at the pictures on VFP and lots aren't funny. ~SirTagstit • VFH • NotM • PEEING • CPT • RotM • BFF 07:52, 14 February 2009 (UTC)

I unno, generally they come with a caption (I think, to be honest I never go to VFP) But I thought yours was funny anyway. Better ask someone like Modus or P.P. as they do great VFP stuff. ~Orian57~ ~Talk~ 08:05 14 February 2009

Alright, because everytime I go over there I see like, random stupid crap. Like right now! There is a coke can that says cancer on it...how the fuck is that even remotely funny??? Alright I will ask both so they will both gimme some insight thanks! ~SirTagstit • VFH • NotM • PEEING • CPT • RotM • BFF 08:09, 14 February 2009 (UTC)

Well it's because there was a scare a while back that diet coke has chemicles in it that may contribute to cancer. ~Orian57~ ~Talk~ 08:14 14 February 2009

I know that...but I guess I am just not one to laugh at cancer kind of stuff. Maybe others find it humorous though. ~SirTagstit • VFH • NotM • PEEING • CPT • RotM • BFF 08:30, 14 February 2009 (UTC)

Hey Tags, I see that your other daddy has already given you some pointers and has said many of the things I was going to say. The image looks good, I like the concept but there are some spotty looking areas that could use some touching up. Are you using Photoshop? Also, Modus is the man for images, he's bloody brilliant. Finally, I've taken the liberty of inducting you into my official SysRq Stalker's Club. Welcome. —Sir SysRq (talk) 18:23, 14 February 2009 (UTC)

Alright, I did some touch up especially around the tree. I think it looks better now. Would you vote for it on VFP? If not I might kill myself cuz even my own daddy isn't proud of me. =( ~SirTagstit • VFH • NotM • PEEING • CPT • RotM • BFF 18:55, 14 February 2009 (UTC)

That's because your a fanny licking himophobe. ~Orian57~ ~Talk~ 18:57 14 February 2009

What's a himophobe? One who is afraid of...him? (shh he's listening) —Sir SysRq (talk) 19:18, 14 February 2009 (UTC)

So would you two vote for it if I put it on right now? ~SirTagstit • VFH • NotM • PEEING • CPT • RotM • BFF 19:35, 14 February 2009 (UTC)

My honest advice is not to fuck with VFP. It's a terrible place. I hate it. But if you wanted to self nom it, I would have no problem voting for it. —Sir SysRq (talk) 19:39, 14 February 2009 (UTC)

K I put it on go vote for it! You too Orian! please...=) ~SirTagstit • VFH • NotM • PEEING • CPT • RotM • BFF 19:45, 14 February 2009 (UTC)

Oh you sound bitter.

Whos lauren? A girlfriend? <chants> Sissy has a girlfriend/ sissy has a girlfriend/ sissy has a girlfriend/ and he's gonna get aids! </chants> you make me sick. ~Orian57~ ~Talk~ 08:26 14 February 2009

Wait, you're going out with your babysitter? - [11:51 14 February 2009] YYettie

It's a long story. Let's just say that the mailman ran over my rabbit. —Sir SysRq (talk) 18:25, 14 February 2009 (UTC)

Awwww. Sissy's girlfriend got ran over. :( I'm sad for you. I dated a mailman once. They sound good on paper but they just don't deliver. I am truly sorry. ~Orian57~ ~Talk~ 18:28 14 February 2009

Well that got a smile out of me, thank you. I'll manage. Also, watch out for that banana peel. —Sir SysRq (talk) 18:30, 14 February 2009 (UTC)

No I mean I'm sorry for lying, I've never dated anyone before let alone a mailman. ~Orian57~ ~Talk~ 18:32 14 February 2009

Oh. For a minute there I thought that you may not actually be an asshole. I guess I was wrong. I take back my warning about that banana peel. —Sir SysRq (talk) 18:35, 14 February 2009 (UTC)

What banAAAAAAAAGGGGHGHHGHGH! ~Orian57~ ~Talk~ 18:37 14 February 2009

That's what happens to A-holes. —Sir SysRq (talk) 18:52, 14 February 2009 (UTC)

Oh...what happens to B-holes? HAHAHAHA...k not funny sorry ~SirTagstit • VFH • NotM • PEEING • CPT • RotM • BFF 18:53, 14 February 2009 (UTC)

Fucking homophobes. ~Orian57~ ~Talk~ 18:54 14 February 2009

Orian, you're an expert on holes, why don't you tell him? —Sir SysRq (talk) 18:59, 14 February 2009 (UTC)

A holes are for angels. B-holes are for bastards. ~Orian57~ ~Talk~ 19:00 14 February 2009

Cute. —Sir SysRq (talk) 19:18, 14 February 2009 (UTC)

I don't work well under pressure. You fucking homophobe. ~Orian57~ ~Talk~ 19:20 14 February 2009

That's funny, because your mom works well under pressure. BOOM roasted...k sorry not funny ~SirTagstit • VFH • NotM • PEEING • CPT • RotM • BFF 19:21, 14 February 2009 (UTC)

Being a prostitute she doesn't have much choice. ~Orian57~ ~Talk~ 19:23 14 February 2009

I love your mom. I also love homophobes. They turn me on. I'm a homophobophile. (Article idea, anyone?) —Sir SysRq (talk) 19:26, 14 February 2009 (UTC)

Funny, The guy I fancied all through out my last year of school was homophobic. Well he wasn't he was gay because I fancied him but he said all these homophobic things as a double bluff. ~Orian57~ ~Talk~ 19:27 14 February 2009

What a dick. And by that I mean I had sex with him and he's got quite a cock on him. *me sighs* What a dick. —Sir SysRq (talk) 19:34, 14 February 2009 (UTC)

He was soo dreamy. And bad boy-ish. I still wank over my mental images. I saw his underwear once. ~Orian57~ ~Talk~ 19:37 14 February 2009