On the twelfth day of Rizzmas my true love gave to me:

12: Twelve inches busting 11: Eleven gooners gooning 10: Ten booms-a-bringin 9: Nine sigmas mogging 8: Eight gyatts-a-clappin 7: Seven moldy lunchlys 6: Six skibidi slicers 5: Five gas station blumpkins 4: Four flickergoons 3: Three Fortnite carts 2: Two munt buddies 1: A hawk tuah spit on that thing

Do not put your penis in a blender.

The amount of pain you would feel would be huge. No matter how tempting or sexy, it is not worth it. Even if it will stop you from losing NNN, just don’t. There are no benefits of doing this, only downsides.

One: you lose your penis

Two: you will probably never probably want to use that blender again, costing a ♥♥♥♥ ton of money to get another one.

Three: the amount of money for the medical bills may kill you. It may cost even more if you or someone else is unable to drive you to the hospital

Overall you just shouldn’t put your penis in a blender. Thank you for coming to my ted talk!

They👥 shall be 🐝 my finest warriors⚔️ , these men 👨🏼‍🦲 who give themselves to me😳 . Like clay🗿 I shall mould them and in the furnace🔥 of war forge them🥵 . They will be of iron⚙️ will and steely muscle🦾 . In great armour🦿 shall I clad them🛠️ and with the mightiest guns🔫 will they be armed👮🏽 . They will be untouched🚫 👈🏽 by plague or disease🤮 , no sicknes💀 s will blight them. 😫 They will have tactics🌍 , strategies and machines🚓 such that no foe👶🏿 can best them in battle💅🏿 . They are my bulwark 🗿 against the Terror😱 . They are the Defenders 🛡️ of Humanity.👩🏼‍🦳 👩‍🦰 👨🏿 They are my Space Marines⚓ and they shall know no fear.🤓

Hello am 48 year old man from somalia. Sorry for my bed england. I selled my wife for internet connection for play “hell diver too” and i want to become the goodest player like you I play with 400 ping on brazil server and I am Super Citizen. pls no copy pasterino my story..

Its absence leaves a void in my spirit, a yearning for adventure unfulfilled. Yet, even in the depths of despair, the flames of passion for gaming burn fiercely within me, driving me to persevere, to cling to the hope that one day soon, I shall reclaim my rightful place among the ranks of HellDivers, where my spirit soars free amidst the pixels and polygons of virtual conquest.

As a Nigerian prince, every ounce of my being resonates with an insatiable hunger for the immersive world of HellDivers 2, a game that transcends mere pixels and code to become a sanctuary for my weary soul. Oh, the depths of frustration I plummet to when confronted with the harsh reality that my last $40, graciously bestowed upon me by an elderly grandmother whom I deceived into providing to me, now stands as a barrier between me and my cherished digital haven. With each passing moment, my heart aches with the longing to once again wield the virtual weapons, to stand shoulder to shoulder with comrades-in-arms, battling through the chaos and adversity that only the digital realm can provide. HellDivers 2 is not merely a game; it is a lifeline, a beacon of hope in a world fraught with uncertainty and hardship.